Miscarriage - surgical management experience

[mumofthe21stcentury]

I have had a missed/delayed miscarriage and need to have a surgical management under general anaesthetic.

Has anyone had this procedure in the past couple of years. It is no longer D&C but it's MVA (a little auction vacuum).

If you can share your experience about how scary it is and your recovery I would really appreciate it.

Today is Friday and my procedure is on Monday 24 June 2019.

Thank you x

Hi @nespressowoo I'm sorry to hear that. This one also took me a year to conceive and I really, really didn't to let it go. I prayed everyday for a miracle to happen.

Leading up to it I wanted to cry all the time (but I didn't let myself). However there were moments I just couldn't hold it in and started crying at work. I was crying in the car. I remained as calm as I could. It's entirely normal to feel heartbroken. The important thing is to grieve. After I 'let myself' grieve I felt much better. How I did it? I secretly knew I was having a girl and my husband and I name her Amelia. Instead of keeping this to myself, I told a friend this and I let myself think of her and the little baby girl Amelia who I could have. I will always remember her. Once I 'let myself' do that, I started to come to terms with it. Whatever your process is just do it. Don't be afraid of what people think of you. Do whatever you think will help you.

I promise you once you had had the procedure you will feel so much better. There is something intrinsically dark about carrying a dead foetus. I had my ERPC on Monday and today is Saturday and I feel better and better everyday. I went back to work on Thursday which helped as I kept my mind off things. My boss knew so I was taking it easy. A lot of people think that I went back too earlier but it felt right to me. Do what feels right to you. There is no 'one way' in coping with grieve and miscarriage.

Xxx

Hello @mumofthe21stcentury

I had the surgery yesterday. It was a long day waiting for a bed to become available but went down at 2pm, was back with my DH at half 3 (who was panicking by this point as had been told I'd only be gone an hour). Home by 6pm. It was an incredibly emotional today, I sobbed and sobbed as the wheeled me to theatre and anaesthetised me, I then woke up sobbing. The surgeon said I'd lost a bit more blood than he'd liked but my HB was stable. I think I'm just a bleeder as I lost 3L with my son.

The surgeon was wonderful, he explained most losses are chromosomal irregularities and nothing I'd done.

I am a HCP and had worked at the hospital for 10 years previously so was odd being on the other side. Once they knew who I was I had a side room to myself which was a lovely token from them, I hadn't told them, the EPAU sister was someone I used to work with so she went out of her way.

I've not slept much overnight as I couldn't get the conversation out of my head about my wishes with regards with what to do with the pregnancy tissue. They asked me if I wanted to attend the cremation service or know when it was going to happen, I have at the moment declined as I think the day in itself will be a reminder for years to come.

Pain hasn't been too bad, had some severe stabbing cramps this am but they pass quite quickly. I am happy I went for the surgical route, I don't know how I'd cope with passing the pregnancy, I am not strong enough for that. I still feel a bit numb and tearful. Not much bleeding at all,

My DS is in nursery today and family are running round for us to help. Everyone has been amazing.

How are you feeling? Please can I ask a personal question? Please don't answer if you don't want to. When will you start TTC again? Surgeon has said no reason to put things on hold if I am ready, just to wait for bleeding to stop, they advise waiting one normal period but that's just for dating reasons if I was to fall again quickly and they'd just scan early if that was the case. Xx

Hi @nespressowoo

I'm glad to hear that your surgery went well. I really like for people to share their experience here so whomever in the future have the misfortune that we had at least they know what they are expecting.

Today is Tuesday and I had my op last Monday (8 days post op). I have only had light spotting (panty liner only and not pads). Today I think the bleeding have stopped or is stopping. I have been doing some pelvic floor exercise and I did yoga last night.

Of course I don't mind the question. I'm going to start trying after my period. This is mainly because I personally believe that my womb area needs to heal for a bit longer. Also mentally I want to be more certain of my dates. Last time I kept being told that I was earlier than I thought and I think it would just drive me crazy if I didn't know and going in more blind than last time. Emotionally I don't think I can take it and therefore I will wait. However it really is entirely up to you. Once you feel physically and emotionally ready, there is no reason not try straightaway. I personally want more certainty for my next pregnancy (at least regarding dates).

I wish you a speedy recovery! Xx

Hope it’s ok for me to share my experience. I had a D and C last Monday I had been told I had a missed miscarriage on 6th June and had tried to miscarry naturally but it didn’t happen then had a 2 week wait for the hospital appointment. The staff at the hospital were amazing so thorough with their questions and reassuring. I became very upset when they took me for the anaesthetic and a nurse kindly held my hand while I was put to sleep. I was only off the ward for an hour while they carried out the procedure. I had very minimal cramps and bleeding that day and was discharged by 2pm (had arrived at 8am)

I honestly found the day went well even though it wasn’t nice circumstances to be in. I’ve found I’ve had bleeding now a week after d and c and unsure if it’s normal as I had nothing in the days following the procedure. I’m actually hoping it’s my period and body starting to get back to some sort of normality.

I would say to anyone having medical management to try not to be afraid, take someone with you who is comforting (I took my friend) and who can chat and keep your mind on other things

Can I ask some advise, I had an embryonic pregnancy in September last year
That I miscarried naturally, today I'm 11 weeks and bleeding, I've been to a and e for bloods etc, scan on Friday, bleeding is heavier every time I wipe though so sure I'm miscarrying again, just wondered if I wait until Friday will it be all over or will I still need medical intervention, how painful will it be? What will the blood loss be like?
Sorry for so many questions

Hi @Sweetpea12 thank you for sharing. The more we share the more we can help other mums to be in the future to prepare for this horrible experience.

Hi @Mumof4andahalf sorry to hear that you're bleeding. I think it's still early day to say whether or not you're miscarrying. Over 50% women can have a bleed or two during their 1st trimester go on to have healthy babies.

On Friday they can let you know whether or not ty may be miscarrying. They will see you blood hcg level and a scan. If the blood result and scan are all fine, then happy days!! If the foetus still has heartbeat but slow growth, they will keep you monitored on a weekly or fortnightly basis. If foetus has no heartbeat, they would advise you to have one of the three miscarriage managements. (1) natural management - wait 2 weeks to see whether it passes naturally (2) don't want to wait then use the medical procedure to 'induce' the process. This can be painful and may not pass all the residue. (3) surgical procedure has (a) D&C, which is like a scrap. A bit more traumatic to your womb and wait longer to try, (b) MVA a suction procedure that is done via local anaesthetic when you're awake. But can be uncomfortable. Since no scraping you can try as soon as you feel ready; and (c) ERPC, which is the suction procedure but done via general anaesthetic. This is what most of the women had on this thread. We find it to be the most certain and comfortable experience for us.

I hope this helps to manage your expectations a little bit for Friday. I will crossing everything for you. Do keep us updated xx

Just an update....i think I've passed everything naturally, the pain was awful but feel much better now, quite relieved it happened at home.

Hi @Mumof4andahalf oh I am so sorry to hear that. At least it was at home. I hope you rest well and have a speedy recovery!

Hi all,

A bit of change of topic. This may be inappropriate, hope none of you are offended. How's sex after EPRC? My first time felt a bit weird and had to stop. When are you physically ready?

HI @nespressowoo I have changed my mind, I have decided not to wait a cycle. I am emotional and physically ready now. First try 12 days after EPRC.

Anyone else want to share I would be grateful!

Thank you x

Hello @mumofthe21stcentury

We haven't attempted it yet as it's only been 5 days but I do feel I want to. I am going to wait the 2 weeks advised due to infection risk, I am hardly bleeding at all though so may re-evaluate that.

I will be nervous. How come you had to stop? Was it painful?

I've just bought the Ava fertility watch / bracelet. I want as much help as I can get and I've read a lot of good things about it. It took 15 months to conceive again after my first MC last year so I am really stressed it'll take longer.

Xx

Hi @nespressowoo thank you for responding. I bled for about 9 days (at the end it was more spotting). The second day that I stopped bleeding we tried and then it just felt a bit uncomfortable at points. It wasn't pain but I would say it was more discomfort and I got scared (mentally) so I stopped. However we attempted 1.5 days later and it was fine.

I think I will give the Ava watch a try, how are you finding it? My last one took me 12 months to conceive as well. However I have read that you'll conceive much more easily after a MC. Try not to stress, lovely!

xxx

Hi @nespressowoo just checking to see how you're getting on. I've starting trying again. I'm also doing acupuncture, reflexology, yoga and all reiki therapy. Hopefully will be pregnant again.

Hello!

I didn't see your last post sorry. How are you?

We had sex about 10 days after the D&C and it was fine to be honest. I had my first period and it went on for absolutely ages. Currently in the TWW. Due around the weekend, using about 4 apps! Wish I could do some acupuncture - just can't justify the cost at the moment.

I'm using about four apps! The Ava bracelet has been very good to be fair and has predicted my ovulation perfectly, confirmed with OPKs. It's really good for tracking temperature, I've been putting that into fertility friend as the chart is quite good and a lot clearer.

Did your period come back ok?

I have been ok on the whole, just every bugger seems to be getting pregnant! X

Hi @nespressowoo

No worries thanks for responding. I tried from 10 days after my ERPC until my period came. My period was light and normal. I think the ERPC sucked out some extra stuff that wasn't meant to be in my womb (just a feeling). My period is back to my pre-baby period (I have a 2.5 year old).

I use Fermometer, Clue, Period and Kindara to track my sex, period, cervical mucus, temperature etc. I find the Ava bracelet too complex for me. The BBT tracking works best for me. I don't think I ovulated after my ERPC and before my period.

Now I'm Day 20 in my cycle and been trying. The way we 'try' is to have intercourse every other day. I have a history of irregular ovulation and never a positive ovulation test. A bit tiring but I am giving everything I have the next few months!

Acupuncture is a science that I don't understand but I'm literally doing everything that doesn't harm my health and may help me get pregnant. I justify the cost by saying that it's cheaper than IVF! I'm so crazy about getting pregnant.

Tell me about it. EVERYONE woman I know it's either pregnant or giving birth - the definition of bittersweet.

I will keep you up to date!!! Please do the same!!

Lots of hugs xxx

I have had both surgical and non surgical management of miscarriages. My surgery was done as an emergency, rather than in a planned way (there was too much bleeding). The surgery itself was unremarkable - I think it only took the gynecology doctor 20 minutes. I found recovery from the anaesthetic was smooth - I didn't feel groggy (there are lots better short acting anaesthetic drugs than there used to be so I didn't have that hungover feeling). Physical recovery was much easier than from my non-surgical miscarriage. I felt a bit bruised and fragile, but had almost no bleeding and went back to feeling not-pregnant within a few days. My emotional recovery was much harder - I had reached 13 weeks and thought it wouldn't happen to me and all the bleeding before surgery really scared me. In terms of physical recovery I found the miscarriage I had at 9 weeks harder - I had terrible period pains for three days and bled for about ten days. On the other hand my emotional recovery was much easier - I think because this miscarriage was earlier and I was better prepared for the possibility.

Hi @mumofthe21stcentury

I know what you mean, I'm crazy too and feel another day goes by is another day lost. It's incredibly hard isn't it.

A family member has announced their pregnancy, due the same day I would've been, her first is also two weeks younger than my son so it stung a bit.

We tend to try around my fertile window, whenever we get the chance. It's hard with a toddler isn't it because we are so exhausted. He's been quite hard work recently.

I'll have a look at the acupuncture. Anything is worth a shot isn't it!

Keep in touch - would be good to know how you get on and I'll definitely do the same

As they say, lots of baby dust! Xx

Hi @nespressowoo

How are you doing? I'm pleased to say that I'm now 27 weeks pregnant! I got pregnant one month after acupuncture.

Hope you're doing well!

Lots of baby dust and hugs xx

Hi @mumofthe21stcentury

I was trying to find this thread!

Congratulations that is wonderful news! How have you been feeling?

I am 11 weeks pregnant - it has taken a long time but have been quite stressed with moving house. I fell pregnant the first month in the new place! I have already had two scans and everything is looking good, I’ve also managed to pick up the heartbeat with a Doppler - I know I shouldn’t but I just needed the peace of mind. My EDD is 30/09. Haven’t told our 3 yr old DS yet as he won’t be able to keep it a secret! Have the 12 week scan in a couple of weeks where I’ll be nearly 14 weeks.

Thanks for checking in. So pleased to hear your news. X

Hi @nespressowoo

I'm SO pleased for you!! Good news all around! Thank you for checking in! I hope the rest of your pregnancy goes well!

Lots of hugs
Xxx

Hi @nespressowoo

How are you? DD is approaching! Just want to let you know that we welcomed our healthy and gorgeous little girl on 26 May!

Hope all goes well with yours.

All good wishes xxx

Hi @nespressowoo

How are you? DD is approaching! Just want to let you know that we welcomed our healthy and gorgeous little girl on 26 May!

Hope all goes well with yours.

All good wishes xxx

Hi @mumofthe21stcentury

I have been thinking of you this week! Big congratulations! That is wonderful news. How are you feeling? Is your toddler besotted?

I'm 30 weeks now, have had a rough pregnancy with appendicitis and being classed high risk but baby - a girl! - is very wriggley and happy. I have had lots of scans and have growth scans to keep an eye on her. Due 27th Sept so not long.

So lovely to hear from you. It must be very hard having a baby in lockdown. Thanks so much for getting in touch.

Hope you had a lovely straight forward labour.

Looking at this thread has bought back lots of memories, we've come far xx

@mumofthe21stcentury congratulations on the birth of your daughter! Glad you got your rainbow 🌈. I'm 31+4 and due my rainbow baby girl in September.

Hi @Chanel05

Thank you - how are you? How's your baby girl doing? Xxx

Hi @nespressowoo

How is it going with you?

My baby girl is almost 6 months - cannot believe it! Looking at the thread just shows that we were so determined to get pregnant.

All good wishes to you both xxx