Hi, don’t really know how to start this off as I feel everyone I’ve spoken to expects you to super happy during your pregnancy and I’ve had so many people shrug me off when I try discuss...
I’m 31 weeks pregnant and although I am feeling incredibly grateful/lucky to be pregnant and cannot wait to meet my beautiful baby soon enough, my anxiety has returned from years ago and I feel totally crippled on a daily basis. I was diagnosed with anxiety about 8 years ago and was put on medication but after about 2 years and some life changes and lots of PMA I came off the pills and have not had any anxiety bouts since. Up until about 3 weeks ago I have been feeling good, still a bit of nerves (I have had 2 previous miscarriages and I’m generally a bit of a worrier), but life has been good and I had been so surprised at how normal I have felt and at ease most of the time, but since hitting the 28 week mark I feel I’ve been a nervous wreck!
All my check ups and everything have been normal but I have become totally fixated on her movements the last few weeks and constantly worry because I don’t feel her for an hour or two that something dreadful has happened. Everyone has told me to look out for a pattern of movement, but I have found it incredibly hard to see a “routine”. Some days she’s active, some days she’s quiet. I feel this is where my anxiety is stemming from as all I seem to panic in the back of my mind about is still born or something terrible happening, as I feel they drill into your head “baby should have a movement pattern” and if it even slightly changes we’re to expect the worst. I’ve already been at my local maternity a handful of times so far and feel such a burden on them and like I’m wasting their time as every time I go in they monitor her for half an hour or so, tell me she’s fine and send me on my way feeling rather embarrassed.
I know this is probably just anxiety on the run up to the birth but I’m finding it incredibly hard to function normally as I find my mind is plagued with worry at the minute about how she is doing in there and her lack of movements some day. Despite reaching out to my midwife and GP on numerous occasions I’ve not felt like I’ve been taken very seriously and kind of forgotten about, I’ve had nothing but a referral to a counsellor which appears to have been forgotten about also as it was at my 28 week appointment which is coming up to 4 weeks ago and whilst I understand these things take time, I don’t have that much time left in my pregnancy!
I have no friends that are pregnant and would understand and I hate to make my poor husband worry more than he already does about me so most of the time I keep quiet about how I’m feeling.
I’m yet to attend my antenatal classes as they start in a week or two and have tried aquanatal classes where I was desperately hoping I might meet other women who I could form a relationship with and at least have someone who might understand my concerns but unfortunately I’m yet to meet anyone who was genuinely interested in making friends and have struggled to find places to meet such people.
Has anyone else had this concern regarding movements and also feeling incredibly anxious about the health of their baby in womb? I just don’t know who else to reach out to as I’ve tried every other option but have been unable to get some sound advice or even someone who may understand how I am feeling and it would be so reassuring to know I’m not alone.
Sorry for the essay story and I hope someone out there can relate x