my partner works away i'm scared he wont be back in time

[hayley2u]

i am scared as my bf works away and i keep panicking that he may mis the birth and realy want him there. told him if he not ill be mad.its a few hour drivedoes anyone have any ideas

when your braxton hicks are becoming more regular then get him to book time off

work wont let hi though. they v toldhim that he can only leave the job when i actually go in to labour. feel so alone

Is it your first baby? Often, but not always, first labours take quite a while anyway so chances are he should be back in plenty of time. Personally I wouldn't rely on Braxton Hicks for giving you advance warning - I had them every evening for weeks before I actually went into labour. Is there someone else - mum, friend, sister who could be a back-up and be with you while he drives back?

yer there is but want him to be there. trust me so hormonal at the minute if he s not id probably lock him out afterwrds. i know its not his fault. this is my second baby been having braxton hicks forlast month plus on and off bleedind.

Mine works away and i was worried about this with my first pg. All was fine, he had plenty of time to get there.

I would say make sure you have some back up in place, friends or relatives that you can ring and are happy to drive you to the hospital and stay withyou for a bit if needs be. You dont have the worry that you will be on your own then.

hairy
how do you copwe with him him being away. he only started working away a couple of months ago so quite scared iv moved i to my dad s at the mn as hate being on my own in the house. just feel more safe here but i know ill have to face living alone when baby comes. hating it feels like he ll just be a weekend dad

look into having a doula..who can get to you quicker than your DP and to be there to support you before and when he gets there. .so no worries about being alone..

You sound generally very anxious hayley. Do you have anyone else to give you support because it sounds as though you could do with a shoulder to lean on?

do you think i could ask to be induced

Well you could ask but induction isn't something to be rushed into IMHO as it can increase the risk of needing further interventions and can be more stressful for the baby. Plus, if you're worried about your partner not being there then it could be worse as most hospitals will chuck your partner out overnight if you haven't gone into labour yet.

You'll be fine, really. Lots of people go into labour at night when presumably he'll be around anyway and even if he's not, labour isn't usually as fast and furious as thye would have you believe on the TV, he will probably have plenty of time to get back.

he better dobby or he ll be dead ha. sorry mad hormonal woman

Hello Hayley2u...you'll cope fine when the baby comes. It's not always ideal when they work away but you do get used to it and in some ways it can be easier too...you only have yourself and the baby to think about int he week.

There was a thread last week about someone else in a similar position...ill try and find it for you. Her baby was 6 months old but her hubby had only jsut started to work away and she was quite upset about it.

I wouldnt ask to eb induced as the others say...honestly it is v. unlikely that your partner wont make it back in time.

My main tip once the baby is here is to get out to soem mum and baby groups to mix with other new mums..you should get lots of support then.

This is the link to that other thread

thread

just to refresh i am now booked in for c section so thankfullt he ll be there, still worried just in case i do go into labour but fingers crossed.
i'm a bit worried how i'll cope afterwards, at the moment myself and my ds have moved in with my dad until baby due,willove back again when baby arrives,my partner will be taking the two weeks off but then he ll be off again and only homeat weekends. as we are renting i have suggested to him that we could rent a flat instead, therefore i feel little more safer when he s not here rather than feel lost in our 4 bed house we rent at the moment.
i know i'll survive but just feling alone, as its only the last few months he has had to work away due to the floods. but this will go on for another year. therfore he'll most probably miss babys first smile, word, crawl.

Hi Hayley2U

I dont know if this will help you at all or not, but I certainly felt for you.

I have just discovered I am pregnant, me and the dad are both British, but I live alone in Eastern Europe and he lives in the Middle East. We are away from each other for long periods of time, 8 weeks or so before we get to see each other BUT we do both have computer access every day and we talk every night and lunchtime through MSN and Yahoo and use the webcam all the time.

It helps, I know it isnt the same as him being there personally with you, but it is a whole lot better than being alone.

Anyway, remember almost one third of the week is a weekend and I will keep my fingers crossed for you that it falls then!

Hi Hayley - hopefully you're still checking this thread....

Is your bf working away in one place, or all over the place? If he's just in one place, and you want to move to a rented flat anyway, then why not just move to wherever he is working for a few months. I'm assuming that your first isn't school age yet, as obv this will be harder if he is.

My dh works abroad during the week every week. He took a couple of weeks off when I had dd, but then was straight back to it. It can be very hard work sometimes, but you do get used to it, and it sounds like you have lots of family around you to help if you stay where you are, which must be a good thing.

Tbh, most dads probably miss the 'firsts', as they are at work during the day anyway, as are many mums!

Glad to hear that the worries about the birth have been resolved though .