NCT antenatal classes

[charlyb]

I'm starting NCT classes Thursday, 2 hours per session, 1 per week but so anxious about going I just want to cancel. I can't stand group performances and stuff like that, can anyone tell me what to expect from a first lesson please?

What is NCT !?

It's a company that runs antenatal classes x

We did a weekend course as the weekly kind wasn't offered at dates to suit us, but, honestly, it was mostly our (tiresome hippy) teacher talking.

If you're that anxious about going, I'd cancel and save your money. NCT teaches you nothing you can't read in most mainstream pregnancy and birth books or find out at the free NHS classes. You're 'buying' a set of 'mummy friends', but my group didn't get on, and hardly ever got together after the babies were born, and you don't have to have done classes or become an NCT member to go to coffee mornings.

It will mainly be the teacher talking, maybe asking questions to the group.

But honestly I found them a waste of time and money - in fact I’d say they were so unrealistic they made my overall birth and breastfeeding experience worse than it needed to be.

The only point of them is making friends but if you’re very anxious I’m not sure how sociable you’ll be feeling?

Ours were very relaxed - no forced presentation and we mainly broke up into groups to look at various things/create sheets to share (if you don't want to talk in front of others, I'm sure someone else will talk on behalf of your group!) I was scared before our first session, but we've ended up with a great set of parents and meet up at least once a week with the babies and text all the time. Try to get over this first hurdle because although the classes themselves are a bit meh, the support network post-birth will be a Godsend!

I felt the same. I really really really didn't want to go. I felt pretty prepared anyway, am really busy and really anxious with new people...

I have class 5 of 8 tomorrow and I LOVE them and really look forward to them. There was a week my husband couldn't make it and I didn't even mind going without him.

Also there aren't really group performances like I thought they'd be. Sometimes we go into groups to discuss things or go round in a circle and contribute something but nothing bad at all.

I had read sooo much stuff so did feel really prepared beforehand but I have found the info really useful and it's been put over in a very good way so I'm super chilled about birth etc

There is no pressure to perform and tbh, without the NCT classes I attended, my first few months of Motherhood and breastfeeding would have been 100 times harder

What do you mean by group performances?

I didn't find ours to be very useful but I know a lot of people who have made friends through it. It really depends on what you want out of it.

Thankyou so much for all your replies! I mean practical work with people I just can't stand the thought it's really starting to freak me out. I think I'm just going to cancel them😔x

It will mostly be the facilitator talking about what to expect from the course, people introducing themselves and talking about what they would expect/like to get from the sessions. Just remember that everyone is in the same boat and just as nervous.

There isn't any practical work?

Ours had a 6 hour first session that was mostly splitting off into groups to brainstorm things like what we wanted our birth environment to be like, how we planned to cope during labour and after birth etc. I’ve read tonnes of info and still found it informative. The group I’m in has some natural extroverts and introverts and by the end we had all swapped numbers and were chatting naturally. It’s a bit awkward at first but I can tell it’s going to be useful for the network. My husband in particular was surprised at how he found meeting other first-time dads to be so positive, he hadn’t realised that he needed to meet other guys going through the same thing. One thing to point out though is that each class will be different, it’s the teacher that sets the topics so no two classes will be the same.

Mine start next week - I am really excited but DH feels like you OP, he finds group situations really stressful and we had a huge row about it. I really want him there though.

Go to the first one, if you don't like it you can leave - they aren't going to lock you in!

Just finished mine, would save yourselves the time and money. As others have said, there's nothing you can't get from a book, quite anxiety-provoking at times and there is way too much wasted time around splitting off into groups to discuss what you think an answer might be for 10 mins only for the teacher to then tell you. Could be far more efficient. Also a subtle but persistent bias towards "natural" birthing, all this stuff about how women are animals and animals are designed to give birth at night and not in hospital - to the point that one of the women cried because she knew she needed a c-section and felt it was "worse". Needless pressure. The social side of it was a bit lukewarm, like everywhere some ok people and some less appealing. Plenty of other ways to meet new mums.

Also a subtle but persistent bias towards "natural" birthing

Ours was about as subtle as a hammerblow. The main thing I remember besides the fact that one of the men fainted when shown a photo of a placenta was the Cascade of Intervention which would follow an epidural as sure as night follows day.

And when we had a collective meet-up which included the teacher after all the babies had been born, she went around to everyone asking what kind of birth we'd had, and was visibly put out to discover that around two thirds of us had a fair bit of intervention and were completely unapologetic about it. It was fine for us, we were all confident older first-time mothers -- but I can easily see how it would have made someone else feel terrible about not having a 'natural' birth.

We did it mainly to meet people and lucked on a really nice group. The ladies are already meeting up whilst waiting for babies to arrive etc.

In terms of the 'work', it was mainly listening to the instructor talk. Sometimes we separated into men/women to do tasks but there will always be someone who's more comfortable with talking to the group so they will no doubt take the lead.

Agree with others, lots of onus on 'natural births' but I mainly tuned that out, my priority is a healthy baby once I've given birth.

It did make me think about things and do some reading though, didn't know anything before the classes!!

It's been 5 years or so since we did our NCT classes but from what I remember they were fairly informative, didn't seem to be pushing a certain agenda. I'm not great with groups of new people but lots of the little activities were with your partner. Never felt put on the spot.
I would say don't underestimate the value of having a group of people (or even 1 or 2) who are going through the same thing as you at the same time and the support you can get (and give). To know you can group whats app at 2am.in the morning and someone us likely to be awake too makes things much less lonely!
I know it's completely pot luck whether you get on with people in your group or not but it's definitely worth a try. You won't be the only one who feels nervous.

I'm halfway through my course and so far we've mostly sat around in a circle listening to the instructor. We've split into two groups of about 8 people once each class, to brainstorm lists of things like what partners can do during labour, etc. The people who were happy to shout out things did so, others kept quiet, nobody was put on the spot. Certainly no performances, role play, games or other such guff. I'm finding them pretty much as useful as I was led to expect - yes it's nothing you couldn't get from the internet and a little biased towards everything 'natural' (depending of course on the teacher) but quite nice to be able to ask questions and meet people at the same stage as you. I also like the fact that it includes the partners so you can both make friends.

I have to disagree with the natural birth thing for ours completely. Our instructor has told us all the way though that they are equal in terms of validity. And purposely refers to a C section as a C birth so it's not seen as a lesser birth.

I also want to add how valuable my husband found the classes. Yes as women we do naturally read about things but I think it's been great for him to have things explained to him from someone other than me.

I don't think you get your money back, you need to go over the refund policy