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Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

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Original poster

grim 20-wk scan. i've been in 3 times and it's not over yet.

69 replies

bakedpotato · 14/09/2004 14:41

long, long, long -- i'm sorry.

i'm having a truly bad day. went in for my anomaly scan this morning. was told by one scanner midway through hb seen etc that my bladder wasn't full enough for a good visual. so tanked up and returned.

another scanner was now on you could tell she was in a stinking mood instantly. she hacked away at my bump, telling the baby to move over, for heaven's sake. i thought she was joking, but her face was cross. then she said there might be a problem with the kidneys, they looked dilated. left me alone in the room while she went to find someone else. returned and said that person wasn't around, i'd have to come back in a fortnight to check that out and also to see the heart she couldn't see the chambers clearly.

i said, i'm not waiting a fortnight, not knowing whether there's a serious problem or not. she said she couldn't fit me in to her schedule before then. her tone was brisk, bored, as if she was ticking me off for being fussy. i said, 'please don't talk to me as if you're a teacher and i'm a child.' i'm afraid voices were raised... on both sides.

she sent me out into waiting area -- i was in floods of tears (fury, mostly, that she was able to talk to me like this). i felt sorry for other pg ladies out there, god knows what they thought. i could hear her though the door,shouting, 'well, what could i do?' then a senior scanning tech came and got me and calmed me down and said she'd scan me this afternoon, i could come back again and again for as long as it took the baby to move, and of course i shouldn't be expected to wait a fortnight for clarification.

i've been in once more -- it's still on its side, they can't see whatever it is they need to. going back in an hour.

i'm not panicking yet, i'm sure it's a matter of getting the right angle, but i do HATE the fact that i'm only getting seen this afternoon because i kicked up a stink. women get the MOST crap deal from medics in pg. it makes me so angry. scanner 2 talked to me as if i were a dimwit. she implied i was unreasonable to refuse to wait for a fortnight. (of course, understaffing was mentioned. considering my situation -- well, really, my heart bleeds.)

wish me well. as well as being furious, i am a bit scared.

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

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Twiglett · 14/09/2004 17:14

message withdrawn

smellymelly · 14/09/2004 17:57

What an awful day. I've had a bad sonographer in the past, but plenty of good ones since. Do they forget how important these scans are to us??

I'm sorry about all the stress you've had today, hope the last scan is good news! I thought one scan every 4 weeks was alot!

bundle · 14/09/2004 18:02

bakedpotato, tried to contact you via CAT but access was blocked. if you want to, amend your profile so I can send you an email..but quite understand if you'd rather not.

SoupDragon · 14/09/2004 18:10

DS2 had the renal dilation thing picked up at a 37 week growth scan. He had low dose Antibiotics after birth in case it was a UTI and was scanned at something like 6 weeks old I think. There was nothing wrong with him. He also made me go back for another 20week scan because they couldn't see all his spine at once. They could see all of it in bits but needed a particular measurement. He was an awkward one.

That sonographer sounds like a right miserable cow! Do they not teach them "customer service" techniques??

fabarooney · 14/09/2004 18:20

You poor thing, BP. You are quite right to be furious at the way you were spoken to earlier. Complain in writing to the hospital!!!!

Original poster

bakedpotato · 14/09/2004 18:26

soupdragon, i am vv reassured by your message. in fact, ALL of these messages help -- i've been logging on in between scans, and sometimes welling up. i blame the hormones of course

well, just had scan number five. (FIVE?) no change. nippper still being unhelpful, heart diff to see in detail. the scanning lady who has done the last 3 was just lovely though. she kept saying, i'm sorry for your horrible day. my DH asked her a lot of questions i hadn't done any of the usual things like asking about size for dates, because it's been such an odd sort of day, so it was nice to come away with some positive stuff finally. oh, apart from the fact that my placenta has moved down it was high at 12 wks. now it's next door to exit. cheers for that.

sad that for whatever reason we didn't get aruond to asking for that scan pic.

going in tomorrow to see not lovely lady, who is off for rest of week, but someone else. hope hope hope this will be end of it.

seem to have spent all day weeping with belly slathered in that gel, but looking on the bright side at least they appear to have some sort of warming mechanism. i only remember chilly gel when i was pg with dd.

OP posts:

luckymum · 14/09/2004 18:32

Bp - sorry you've had such a cr*p day.

My ds2 had renal dilation picked up at a scan (poss 24 weeks but can't really remember as he's 13 now!!) The measurement was noted as the 'upper limits of normal'. We had a dreadful 2 week wait until a more detailed scan which was inconclusive, but the sonographer was more reassuring. Thankfully following renal tests after birth he was given the all-clear.

Hope this gets sorted for you tomorrow and the little blighter behaves while he/she has his picture taken. Good luck X

Original poster

bakedpotato · 15/09/2004 11:35

sixth scan this morning. the baby had finally moved and they could see the heart. me and DH had got the renal dilatation thing into perspective overnight and thought we were going to be dismissed, but then it turned out that there was something on the heart that on its own wouldn't cause concern but in conjunction with the renal thing meant that we would have to be referred on, as they were both 'soft markers' for downs. the word amniocentesis was mentioned.

more weeping. waited 40 mins to see a consultant (v good, calm and clear) who said that since my quadruple test result was low, 1 in 1,900, and i'm a 'young mother' (34), she wouldn't see the need to refer us for amnio unless we really wanted it. perhaps i'm being overly positive but i've seized on this. i want to stop thinking about this and stop thinking about worst-case scenarios.

i want to believe her, that our child is well and healthy, and that we have just been exposed to TMI.

they're going to arrange another scan on monday with a doctor, not sonographer, in the hope that the whole thing can be put into context for us... i think she wants us to get some reassurance. she seems to think a scan will do this for us. it's not going to undo what they've picked up so in some ways i'm not sure it's worth doing, but if we come out of it feeling more positive, then it will be a good thing.

i am fine about the scan but feel strongly that i don't want invasive tests and anxiety. don't want to have a child with down's, not sure i could cope or that it would be fair on dd (sorry if this offends anyone but it's my instinct), but feel that the signs are pointing away from that.

wonder what the best thing is.

OP posts:

bundle · 15/09/2004 11:41

bakedpotato, you're really going through it, you poor thing. which dr did you see? was it Miss H?? i tried to email you yesterday, but you'd blocked it on CAT. I too didn't want a Downs baby and had 2 amnios, so if you want to chat more, please unblock your email, x

frogs · 15/09/2004 11:43

My youngest sister had the renal dilation thing with her first baby too. They gave the baby antibiotics for the first few weeks after birth just in case, but everything was fine.

Blu · 15/09/2004 11:47

bakedpotato - was it 'echogenic focii' in the heart? these are harmless little deposits of calcium that many, many babies have and that are in themselves completely harmless. There is some statistic that suggests that slightly more DS babies have them than other babies, so this, coupled with the fact that your baby has this borderline / average renal dilation, is presumably what is prompting them to suggest DS.

We found ourselves having amnio under similiar circumstances - my nuchal fold test gave good results - but not anywhere near as good as yours. It was an awful experience, (the waiting for results, the worry of mc, the fact that by 20 wks the baby was moving and I felt I was being disloyal to it) and on the odds and evidence we were given, I wonder why on earth we did it! In hindsight, I wished we had done CVS at 12 weeks - but then I am definitely an older mum.

We were also in a unit concentrating on research.

Good luck with wahtever you decide - but it seems to me that the odds are very heavily in your favour!

Original poster

bakedpotato · 15/09/2004 11:47

bundle, i've done it

OP posts:

Original poster

bakedpotato · 15/09/2004 11:50

blu, yes, that was it

i don't know if i'm strong enough to go for amnio. risks of m/c seem so much higher than the risks of downs. even with 2 soft markers factored into my quad test results, i still don't qualify as high-risk. but then stats are not my strong point

OP posts:

Twiglett · 15/09/2004 12:10

message withdrawn

jellyhead · 15/09/2004 12:32

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Tessiebear · 15/09/2004 12:55

Really feel for you baked potato - have been following this thread with fingers crossed for you! Have a really good friend (nearly 40) who is expecting her 3rd. She is adamant that she would not keep a Downs baby and therefore had an amnio. She said it was absolutely fine and not really painful or anything. Her results came back fine and she is really glad she had it. As you feel strongly on the Downs issue i would really think you need to have an amnio

beansprout · 15/09/2004 12:56

Thinking of you BP and keeping everything crossed for you.

FWIW I am in North West London and would happily drive over to the Whittington to bop witch woman on the nose if it would help?

Blu · 15/09/2004 13:12

BP: Jellyhead's suggestion sounds a good one to me - it's the Harris Birthright Trust Unit at King's.

princesspeahead · 15/09/2004 13:27

poor you, bp. Also get them to have a look for a developed nasal bone - which is a good sign that it ISN'T DS. The Harris Trust will look for this for you. I was relieved to see that my ds2 looked like barry manilow in utero, which I was told meant he almost definitely didn't have DS, although my nuchal scan was pretty uninformative either way.
Just another "soft marker" to look out for. THinking of you.

Original poster

bakedpotato · 15/09/2004 18:12

rang antental unit and asked, and thankfully they've arranged an appt/detailed scan with 2 consultants, inc fetal medicine person, tomorrow.they sound like the top people -- yes, bundle, the person i saw this morning was Miss H, and she's going to be present for the scan. do you have a take on her? i thought she seemed good.

may go for amnio if things point that way (i'm coming round to this). they can do it there and then if necc.

spent afternoon in park with dd and doctor friend undergoing treatment for breast cancer. oddly enough, she was fantastic steadying company.

glad i don't have to wait till mon. god what an awful 2 days.

OP posts:

Angeliz · 15/09/2004 18:14

baked potato, hope you are o.k
Best of luck for tomorrow+++++++++++

Original poster

bakedpotato · 15/09/2004 20:36

bundle, i thought i'd unblocked my email earlier, but actually i don't think i have. i can't work out how to do it either , without getting junk mail. (going mad can't concentrate) perhaps i'm looking on wrong mn page
frustrating

OP posts:

bundle · 16/09/2004 11:34

i've sent you one, did you get it?

Original poster

bakedpotato · 16/09/2004 13:28

bundle, i didn't get it

just back from amnio

they were as reassuring as i suppose they can be

feel very low

OP posts:

Blackduck · 16/09/2004 13:32

BP I had an amnio so know what you are going through - take it easy this afternoon - feet up and all that. Fingers crossed for you.

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