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Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

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Original poster

Work Residential 8 months pregnant

43 replies

Autumnsloth · 21/05/2019 19:27

Hello, I wanted to ask advice about going away on a work residential. The residential is 3 days long, and takes place on an island which is at least a 5 hour train journey from where I live. By then I will be 8 months pregnant (3/4 weeks before my due date). This is my first pregnancy so I have absolutely no experience of how I will feel - is there any obvious reason why going to this event would be a problem?

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Sexnotgender · 21/05/2019 19:30

What type of island? We talking remote desert island or populated with at least a hospital island?

Sexnotgender · 21/05/2019 19:33

I’m 15 weeks post partum and I’d probably have gone at 8 months. However i had a pretty straightforward pregnancy and whilst big wasn’t utterly enormous.

How far along are you now?

Only thing I’d probably have struggled with was sleeping, I had appalling hip pain at night so slept on a doubled over duvet to try and ease the pain. My concern would be a horribly uncomfortable bed.

INeedNewShoes · 21/05/2019 19:33

It's impossible to know how you will be.

At 7 months I was really struggling physically but then had a miraculous recovery at 8 months and felt better than ever. I wouldn't have wanted to be more than an hour from a maternity unit/midwife though.

angelix · 21/05/2019 19:33

I'm in my first pregnancy too (and a worrier) so I wouldnt be comfortable going that far from home at that stage.
Not sure if that's just because it's my first time though, maybe other mums would disagree.
Cant help but feel that the fact you've asked suggests you're having doubts though, that being the case, go with your gut!

BlueJava · 21/05/2019 19:33

I wouldn't want to go - 3 to 4 weeks before due date is getting close and you'll be a long way from home. I'm sure work would understanding if you talk to the HR Dept.

flowery · 21/05/2019 19:37

I would not have wanted to travel on a train for 5 hours at 8 months pregnant.

Original poster

Autumnsloth · 21/05/2019 19:38

@sexnot it is inhabited. There is one small (10 beds) hospital, I don't think that they have a midwife unit. It is 20 minutes to the mainland by ferry, and then another hour to the nearest hospital on the mainland.

Good point about comfort - I'm 4 and a half months now, and can only sleep with a maternity pillow that would not fit in my suitcase!

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Original poster

Autumnsloth · 21/05/2019 19:41

@angelix nail on the head - the residential just got announced and I was having doubts, but wasn't sure if maybe I was just worrying for no reason!

Good points about the travel and being far from home that close.

OP posts:

Sexnotgender · 21/05/2019 19:49

20 minutes by ferry - how often are the ferries? Do they run overnight?
Then an hour by car... NOPE!!

In that case definitely don’t go.

By the time I’d waited on a ferry then got to the hospital I’d pretty much have had my baby. No thank you.

ThanksItHasPockets · 21/05/2019 19:59

It is 20 minutes to the mainland by ferry, and then another hour to the nearest hospital on the mainland.

That would be the decision made for me. No way.

DPotter · 21/05/2019 20:05

I would also be concerned about what activities you would be expected to take part in. If it's just round table work - well OK. But if there's lots of tramping around the island - not so good.
At 8 months - I had heart burn, carpel tunnel syndrome and was very uncomfortable in my own bed. And I'd been on maternity leave for a month by then as well.
On balance I would decline the invitation

Tableclothing · 21/05/2019 20:11

No way. If you did have the baby while you were there (are you going to take a hospital bag too), even if it was a perfectly straightforward delivery (no guarantee baby's father could be there) and you have a bouncing baby in perfect health, you would then have to make a 5 hour journey home again, days post-partum and with a newborn. No no no no no.

Teddybear45 · 21/05/2019 20:18

No that sounds risky if you had complications. Are they insisting you go? If so you could save up all your leave and just use it before your mat leave starts

RandomMess · 21/05/2019 20:33

I did lots of travelling and stuff when heavily pregnant and overdue (have 4 DC). However no would I do that distance that heavily pregnant for a work 3 day residential! Too many unknowns.

Lovelydovey · 21/05/2019 20:35

No, no and no. And I suspect HR would say no too.

FraterculaArctica · 21/05/2019 20:36

With my first pregnancy I could have done it, been a bit uncomfortable but OK. Bearing this in mind, when pregnant with DC2 I organised to go to a work meeting via sleeper train at 35 weeks. Luckily I ended up in hospital and never got on that train - she was born that night after a 45 min labour! Just as the train was pulling into its destination...

MrsRolly · 21/05/2019 20:38

I think the risk assesment at my work would send our H&S lead into such a panic there is no way you would be going!! Do you have a pregnancy risk assesment at the moment? I dont think I would have wanted to be so far away from my other half that close. I made my DH come to the funeral of someone he had never met at that stage with our first just in case.

GlossyTaco · 21/05/2019 20:40

I think the answer will have to be no op.

I asked to be excused from a day trip when I was 7 months pregnant because it was a 4hr round trip and the destination was hilly. It would've involved hours of walking while there too.

I think you have every right to give this one a miss op.

PotteringAlong · 21/05/2019 20:43

Noooooo. No. Just no.

Cuddlysnowleopard · 21/05/2019 20:46

Are your HR department even considering this?

The last four weeks of my first pregnancy, I could hardly walk. His head was engaged, and I could just about waddle. I went on maternity leave at 38 weeks, but the last two weeks at work were a real struggle, physically.

DS2 arrived, unexpectedly, spontaneously and healthily, at 35 plus 5...One minute I was strolling round the park with DS1, the next my waters had gone and I was in labour.

I wouldn't risk it.

Original poster

Autumnsloth · 21/05/2019 21:07

Thanks all for your comments - definitely going to talk to work and explain why I don't feel comfortable committing to this. Glad I asked, reading about everyone's experiences makes me feel on solid ground explaining it to them.

OP posts:

TokenGinger · 21/05/2019 22:28

I'm now 37+5. I had my baby shower at 35+1 and the effort required just for that was hard work. I honestly don't think I'd have been able to travel that far. You probably won't get travel insurance for it, either. Many ferries will not allow you to travel past a certain stage.

Also, there is no way I could comfortably sit in a train/plans/ferry seat right now, or for the past few weeks. It's so uncomfortable.

I personally wouldn't commit to it at 8 months.

Also at 8 months, I was admitted to hospital twice in 8 days for monitoring as baby wasn't moving. You never know what medical attention you may need.

stillworkingitout · 21/05/2019 22:32

In both of my pregnancies I refused to visit my parents after about 30 weeks - they live in a much more rural area than I do. I live 10 minutes from a world class maternity hospital with neonatal unit and children’s hospital. They live an hour from a mediocre hospital where complex cases are sent a further 3 hours to their large centre. For me it wasn’t worth the consequences of a preterm or complex delivery, however unlikely. Chances are you’ll be absolutely fine, but if you’re not the outcome could be poor

FogCutter · 21/05/2019 22:37

My baby was born unexpectedly and very quickly when I was 8 months pregnant (36 weeks) - it happens!

I'd not go on the residential. In any case you/your work should be carrying our risk assessments in relation to your pregnancy and work and I think the residential would be a potential risk.

lemonjam · 21/05/2019 22:50

I’m 7 and a half months pregnant now, and if I could guarantee a really comfortable bed with at least 8 (!) pillows then I probably would go... the pillows would be a real breaker though!

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