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Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

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Original poster

Second pregnancy after a rough first one ?

15 replies

Emmabryant123 · 10/05/2019 20:39

I have one dd and she is 3 until a while ago I absolutely thought I was one and done but have been having more thoughts recently about a second ...

My first pregnancy wasn't great ...
I had episodes of unexplained bleeding throughout
Terrible sickness ( I was on medication and sick daily until the end ) often mutiple times a day ..
I also developed pre eclampsia at 34 weeks and i was induced at 35 weeks
She was healthy but spent a couple days in special care

Has anyone had a better second pregnancy?

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ThisIsTheEndgame · 10/05/2019 20:43

My pregnancy with DC1 wasn't as bad as yours, but I still suffered with sickness, exhaustion and swelling. With DC2 it was.so easy i completely forgot I was pregnant for large chunks of time, and my large belly often took me by surprise.

Original poster

Emmabryant123 · 10/05/2019 20:45

Oh I also had the bloody restless legs and heartburn so bad I would vomit from it
Eurgh but I would love one more

OP posts:

Aw12345 · 10/05/2019 20:54

Following this thread as I would love another baby but also had an awful pregnancy (and birth which ended in me being very ill with sepsis). I sooo know your dilemma. Part of me feels that it's 'only' 9 months of suffering for something so amazing but then I think that 9 months is a very very very long time to be so unwell!!

Original poster

Emmabryant123 · 10/05/2019 21:38

It's hard isn't it and I wonder about looking after DD if I was that sick again...

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Aw12345 · 11/05/2019 05:48

Yes absolutely, that's my main concern too tbh. Someone my DH works with has had a very bad 3rd pregnancy (first 2 were ok) and it's just so difficult looking after 2 kids, getting ready for new baby, working etc.

Original poster

Emmabryant123 · 12/05/2019 17:34

Yep I just feel so conflicted about it at the moment

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Cantthinkofausername1990 · 13/05/2019 21:00

Yes I had an awful first pregnancy.
This time it has been hard at parts but in a different way to my first pregnancy and no where near as bad. I'm nearly 36 weeks now and still working, I actually can't believe how manageable this pregnancy has been in every way.

Original poster

Emmabryant123 · 14/05/2019 08:36

Ah brilliant
What did you have that was difficult in your first ?

OP posts:

Reastie · 14/05/2019 08:52

My pg as awful, to the point I think I had ptsd and took years to recover. I felt sick every single day and was bed bound for months. I basically didn’t leave the house for the full 9 months. I had servere pg anxiety but didn’t realise it at the time. I had pgp from about 14 weeks and could barely walk or sit for over half an hour in the same position. I had constant thrush all the way through. My heartburn was so bad I had to sleep sitting up for months. I had insomnia and didn’t sleep properly for the whole 9 months. It was awful. I won’t even go On!

I was convinced dd would be an only child and it took me 8 years to think I might manage it again.

I’m now 34 weeks. So far the sickness has been the same, but I’m more informed about medication and have had to be very proactive in getting medication but I have and this has helped. I haven’t yet had thrush once, my anxiety generally is better than last time (although still an issue), sleep has been improved from last time, aches and pains much easier to cope with compared to last time, no pgp yet other than some aches and pains that I think are more normal. My hands don’t go numb at night, I’m having less heartburn, I’m having less nighttime pains. I have minimal swelling whereas last time by now no shoes fit me, Generally my body feels like it’s coping much better under the stress. I’ve put on about a stone less than last time at this point (I put on a huge amount of weight last time). The only thing just as bad is the sickness despite the meds! I’m still signed off and still very housebound with it. Makes me realise how bad I was last time and how most people experience pg. I say all this knowing tomorrow it coukd all go to pot and I have a terrible last 6 weeks! But I speak on behalf of my experience so far.

Mrsmummy90 · 14/05/2019 09:07

My first pregnancy was so horrific that I was looking into hiring a surrogate for baby number 2.
In October, we conceived (big surprise) and this pregnancy has been a million times easier. I'm 29+4 and it's only started to get difficult the past few weeks due to SPD but it's still so much better than the pregnancy with dd and I'm coping really well.

This will definitely be my last though.

Original poster

Emmabryant123 · 14/05/2019 09:09

Oh goodness
I am so sorry you went through all that with your first
My dd is 3 now and I'm only just at the point of thinking maybe I could do this again
I'm a sahm and she is in nursery 11 hours a week so I would get a chance to rest in the week if I had bad sickness again

I took medicine last time as well
I wish I could go and talk to someone about what happened last time around the pre Eclampsia etc as it all feels like it was never explained properly

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Original poster

Emmabryant123 · 14/05/2019 09:11

Oh if we had a 2nd it would be my last too
Dp has said he would not consider a 3rd and he thought for a long time before saying we could think about having a second

OP posts:

Reastie · 14/05/2019 10:24

Mrsmummy I too looked into a surrogate because my first pg was so awful!

Op definitely have a plan in place for childcare. Before I got pg I saw my gp to make sure she was on board and supportive to give me sickness meds (I was only given cyclizine last time and made to feel I was lucky to get that). You could also ask the gp to refer you to someone to debrief you about what happened during your birth last time. I asked my family if they would be able to do school runs shouod I get pg so I knew I wouldn’t have to stress about that. Dh was also aware how it was likely I would feel and that I would be useless for months. For me I set an end date on ttc because I couldn’t take the indefinite anxiety of whether I’d be pg every month, and tbh I still didn’t know if I coukd cope with it and if I was making a mistake. Part of me wanted it not to work. Ironically the month it happened I told dh before af was due I thought it was a mistake because I didn’t think physically I could cope with it again and we should stop trying. That’s not because I didn’t want the baby but because I didn’t think I could cope with the pg, obv I wouldn’t have it another way now! Everything you can plan now to make your life easier is worth thinking about and doing.

Original poster

Emmabryant123 · 14/05/2019 10:32

Thank you
I would have plenty of people willing to help with my daughter and nursery is only a 5 minute walk away each way ...

Did anyone suffer the restless legs as well ? They left me in tears unable to sleep most nights from about 26 weeks

I do really want a second

OP posts:

Mrsmummy90 · 14/05/2019 19:44

IIRC restless legs is often caused by some kind of deficiency. Talk to your gp about it and ask what extra supplements you could take xx

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