2 miscarriages and losing hope

[Rmac90]

Hi ladies
I had a miscarriage in December last year and another one 2 weeks ago. I was 7 weeks with my first and 8 weeks with my second. I asked the hospital could they do some tests incase there is something wrong with me but they said i need to have 3 miscarriages before they will do any tests and to "just try again".
When i had my first miscarriage i was told “theres a very slim chance of it happening again” so just try again which i did, it happened again so i am beginning to think i cant carry a baby. I only found out I miscarried the second time because i paid for a private scan because i was so anxious. Both my mc were different the first one i had bleeding for 2 weeks which i was told it was probably implantation bleeding, then i miscarried on the 27th December. The second time everything was fine no bleeding had all the pregnancy symptoms, i still had them when i got told the baby had no heartbeat. I am petrified to try again incase i have another miscarriage because physically and mentally i dont think i will be able to cope. Everyone around me seems to be announcing there pregnancies some days i feel like I am on a downward spiral and i cant talk about it face to face with my partner because i hate getting upset in front of people so i just bottle it all up inside. Does anyone have any success stories after 2 miscarriages in a row? i am losing all hope :(

I had 2 mc last year both at 7 weeks. I’m now 25 weeks pregnant. I was shocked to have a second mc. To be honest, I was shocked to have my first after a straight forward pregnancy last time 3 years go. I was very naive. 25% of pregnancies end in mc.

I’m going to be honest, the anxiety of mc has never left me but every day/week gets easier.

It was recommended by my radiographer to take mini aspirin when I found out I was next pregnant for 3 months which I did.

I know what you have gone through. Please keep hope x

@Tobebythesea that's lovely news you are pregnant again!
Yeah i have read about taking aspirin do you get this from the GP or can you just buy it? Im going to ask my GP if she can check my ferritin levels I also read somewhere this could play a part in the loses if they are low ect, so hopefully she will check them for me because the hospital wont carry out any tests until I have had 3 mc's I mean its brutal expecting a woman to go through 3 before being tested 😔 x

I agree it is brutal and women need better after care too, being told it's common its unlikely to happen again go away and try isn't helpful at all. I took aspirin too with my successful pregnancy, I did a lot of research and decided to try it and took it the moment I got a bpf until delivery. You can buy it it's just low dose aspirin I bought mine at a supermarket. I have no idea if it was that or just coincidence but was willing to try anything.

*bfp

@thecheshirecatcanfuckoff yeah after my first one i was told "theres a very slim chance of it happening again try when you are ready" i tried again and it happened again now I am beginning to wonder can I actually carry a child! The nurses shouldn't say things like that 🤦🏼‍♀️ x

No they shouldn't, think they forget we are people and not statistics. I had fab nurses that were kind to me, but the doctors/scan people were not which is sad these are the people that should support women and their partners in such a difficult and sad time. I'm sorry you were treated poorly. Keep talking about how your feeling it helped me enormously, knowing I wasn't alone I think saved me.

So sorry to hear what you've been through another happy story here for you. I had two mc about 8 months apart. The second was on a 'killer cells' programme where the steroids made me so ill. I then decided to focus on my health and just try to be the best I could physically and mentally. Couple of months later, with no meds, aspirin etc, I fell pregnant and my daughter is now almost 2. Btw not at all saying that the steroids and aspirin don't help - they just didn't help me and I followed my own instincts in terms of what made me feel well and good in myself.

Sending lots of baby dust your way 💕

It might help to pay for Level 1/2 testing (many fertility clinics include these as part of their fertility MOT). It was only after I got my results that I was given a reason for my implantation failures / early losses and then put on a protocol that resulted in a BFP.

Now of course I am fast approaching my 2nd trimester and the NHS seems determined to put roadblocks in the way of the treatment I got at the clinic - it seems ‘wait and see if there’s a problem’ or the ‘do nothing and lets see if she has a stillbirth/miscarriage’ is still the preferred option for a lot of consultants.

@Teddybear45 i can relate to them putting roadblocks in the way! The midwife said to me you get your first scan between 11-13 weeks, i asked could i get the scan at 11 weeks as I had already suffered a mc and was so anxious! She said she would ask the sonographer to which there reply was "no it will need do be 12-13 weeks so we get an accurate reading, i could wait that long as i had a gut feeling something was wrong (i was 10w pregnant at this point) so I offered to pay for a private scan soon as I offered them money they were happy to do it!!!! When they scan me she told me my baby was only measuring 8w so it looks like it stopped growing 2 weeks before!
It annoys me when there not willing to help you but soon as you offer money then everything is possible! xx

There is always hope, take care of yourself and don't give up.

4 MCs
1 healthy boy
1 MC
1 healthy boy

Life is a bit random, what more can I say!!