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Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

Original poster

Can my DD insist on a plan for delivery

19 replies

fluorescentorange · 01/05/2019 20:32

My DD had a few growth scans and after the last one on Tuesday she was booked in for s CSection as her baby was big, transverse and she has Polyhydramnios.
All good so far. Her DH works offshore do came off and began his paternity leave today. She was all ready for surgery when they scan her and baby is head down so they cancelled the op and have asked her to stay for monitoring for the next 48 hours. Still all ok!
The consultant then says if baby stays there for 48 hours they will induce at 39 weeks, which is Sunday.
Now here is where it gets a bit frustrating, they said as it is BH they may leave her til Tuesday, that is nearly 1 week of her DP’s paternity leave used up. She wants to insist on an induction or CS depending on where her baby is lying on Friday when she will be 38+5 can she insist on this due to the nature of her partners employment and his leave?

OP posts:
Bambamber · 01/05/2019 20:36

You can request a c section even if there is no medical need, consultants can be very unwilling to agree though. Not sure about induction.

She won't be able to demand it for a certain day though. Inductions and c sections are generally done on a priority basis. If it's not being done for a medical need they will prioritise other ladies in front of her

moreismore · 01/05/2019 20:36

I doubt she’d be able to under the NHS. Their concern is for safety of baby and mother. As annoying as this situation is, that is surely more important?

MaverickSnoopy · 01/05/2019 20:45

Unlikely. I take it she's explained the situation?

churchthecat · 01/05/2019 20:46

Not on the NHS. You'd have to go private to book a specific date for those reasons.

WoWsers16 · 01/05/2019 20:48

This happened to my friend- she was induced twice and then luckily it worked the second time - however that took a week so her partner lost out on a week.
When we sorted my partners paternity leave I told him to book it a week or two after my due date so we def knew baby would be here.
Unfortunately their care doesn’t lie with the fathers paternity leave, it’s with baby. I don’t think you can demand anything x

WoWsers16 · 01/05/2019 20:49

Just re read - being induced could take another week- so even if it is done this Friday baby may not be here till next Wednesday x

Original poster
fluorescentorange · 01/05/2019 21:00

Thanks for your replies, she is going to explain in the morning and I have said she must be as nice as possible and try not to come across as bring insisting on anything, just ask them to help her out if they possibly can. She does understand that induction can take a week so that is why she is panicking slightly that he will be back at work before she even delivers the baby😁

OP posts:
WoWsers16 · 01/05/2019 21:04

I agree- be nice about it and hopefully that may sway them - as it’s the ones that get mad and arsy that I bet don’t x

PennyMordauntsLadyBrain · 01/05/2019 21:33

Has he got any annual leave to fall back on?
DH tacked on two weeks of AL after his paternity leave, so bad a month off in total. Not every workplace can be that flexible but worth looking into.

dementedpixie · 01/05/2019 21:38

I thought you couldn't start paternity leave until the baby was born

Original poster
fluorescentorange · 01/05/2019 21:44

His leave is very difficult and not like other places as he works offshore and I don’t understand the full details but it is not as simple as normal jobs. He has to get a helicopter to bring him off rig if it isn’t a change over day or something. I am sure they will sort it out. Thanks

OP posts:
Melamine · 01/05/2019 22:09

Paternity leave can’t legally start before the baby is born. So I’m not sure what that means for the time he has to take beforehand. Maybe annual or unpaid leave?

Original poster
fluorescentorange · 01/05/2019 22:14

Oh right, well I clearly don’t fully understand the story here, I will see what happens tomorrow. Thanks

OP posts:
SlB09 · 01/05/2019 22:24

Priority will be the health of baby and mother. Each procedure has serious risks and they will only deliver when facilities, staffing and resources are safe enough. I know using leave seems like a pain but I don't think it's a reasonable request or reason to have baby born earlier.

itwasalovelydreamwhileitlasted · 02/05/2019 08:58

As per previous poster paternity leave doesn't legally start until the day baby is born x

WoWsers16 · 02/05/2019 11:56

Paternity leave does start even before baby is born- you choose when you take it. If you decide to take 2 weeks off and baby is 2 weeks late- you can’t just take another 2 weeks off.

dementedpixie · 02/05/2019 12:00

www.gov.uk/paternity-pay-leave/leave says leave cannot start before the birth and that you don't have to give an exact date of when to start it

DrWhy · 02/05/2019 12:04

I can tell you from experience that if his wife gives birth when he is offshore most companies will do everything they can to get him on a hopper (helicopter that stops in at several platforms) even if it’s not crew change day. I was on a flight in pretty rough weather where they were trying to pick up one guy for compassionate reasons and the helicopter made about 3 attempts to actually get down on the deck because the pilot was determined to get him home (obviously don’t know the nature of the compassionate reason in that case). There’s always a chance that the company will be awkward about it but that could be the case with any employer regarding shift work. It’s probably a good idea for him to keep his employer in the loop with what’s happening, he might be able to do some days onshore while she’s waiting for the induction, training or office catch up and his employer can see if someone else is able to do his next rotation. It depends a bit how accommodating they are but the more he communicates with them the better the chance of making it work.

LetsSplashMummy · 02/05/2019 12:14

Would his job add compassionate leave to the start of the paternity leave. My DH was given compassionate leave for the first week after the birth as DD and I were in hospital.

I think it would be easier to ask the employer to be considerate of this than the hospital to fit to their schedule.

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