Gender scan nerves

[Juanaiguana]

Hey all, having a 20 week scan this week and I want to know if my baby is a boy or girl!!
I’m so nervous and even though I don’t have a preference of what I want, I’m scared I’ll be disappointed which I know is weird! Anyone else in the same position waiting for a scan?
This is my second baby and I already have a boy. I suppose I’m scared I’ll be disappointed if it is another boy as my family have been in my ear about having a girl x

Hi, I’m in a similar position as I have a 3yo DS and would love another boy for DS. At the same time I would love a daughter. I’m worried I’ll feel somewhat disappoint by either when I’m told but i think it mainly comes from the opinions of other people. For example, if I have another boy I don’t want people thinking that it’s any less enjoyable than a little girl just because I have a boy already. I probably just need to learn to not take any notice of what other people think. As long as you’re happy that’s the main thing!

I’ll add the obligatory “it’s not a gender scan, it’s an anomaly scan”....

@Longislandicedme I’m glad someone gets it!! Id be happy with another boy but people seem to have a lot to say when you have a son people always want to bring you down or say ‘oh when are you doing to have a girl?!’

I'm thinking all the same as you! What's worse for me is I went to a really good medium, and she told me I'd be pregnant in next few months (which was true) and that I'd have a "little princess", even told me the one name me and OH had discussed and said that would be her name. So obviously I told all my family what she said, and then when I found out I was pregnant everyone is now expecting it to be a girl. My dad even refers to it as the name we liked for a girl. I feel like everyone will be disappointed now if it is a boy, not many girls in our family so I know it's what everyone wants

@N3WBi3 wow that’s really interesting! I wonder if it will be a boy or girl! These things have to be taken with a pinch of salt though- I hope either way your family will be happy! From what I’ve seen on MN and in real life, boys seem to be classed as the second best option

I understand why people want a daughter. I thought I wanted my son to be a girl before he was born as I had no brothers (I’m an only child) so I wanted a relationship like me and my mum. My son happens to be exactly how I imagined a relationship with a daughter to be, he’s my little best mate. Made me realise sex has no impact on the relationship you’ll have with your child. Part of the reason I think I wanted him to be a girl was because his father left us and I was worried I wouldn’t be able to teach him ‘boy’ things. That has never been an issue thank god! Anyway, I got a few comments from people saying things like oh isn’t it a shame you won’t be able to buy cute girls clothes. I find comments like that really immature as there’s more to a baby than what you dress it in!

I think that women often really want at least one girl, and most posters on this board are women. I suspect that if most posters were men, a girl would be seen as a potentially disappointing option much more often.

I really wanted a girl, but I felt a bit sad at the possibility of not finding out what DH’s son might turn out like. It was vaguely disappointing to find out that I am having a boy, but it’s lovely that I should indeed find out what DH’s son will be like (I’m definitely hoping for an absolute sweetheart), and I’m very glad that I won’t be having any negative gender feels when I’ve just delivered (if the scans are wrong, I’m very happy with a girl, and we’ve got the name picked out).

My point is, if you do find that you are disappointed, that’s fine. You’ll get used to the idea, whatever it is, and have lots of time to get used to whatever it is before it is born. Just sit with whatever you feel - it’s not wrong to feel however you feel, and bad feelings will pass. 🙂

@Juanaiguana boys only become 'second best' when you already have 1! I have my gender scan today and already have a DD, every single family member has either said 'I'm team boy' OR I hope its a boy, id love a little boy 🙄 didn't realise they were having the baby....