I know I’m lucky. There are people who cannot have children. But I cannot help but be fed up. I haven’t slept properly since before December, and these past 2 weeks I seem to be up since 5, regardless of the time I manage to fall asleep or the amount of times I wake in the night, tossing and turning, never able to stay comfy. I was sick 6 times today. I’m not sure if it’s morning sickness or a bug. But it won’t go. I feel like my partner doesn’t care, so I get annoyed or angry or cry- no wonder he isn’t that interested in me right now. I must be a nightmare. Only recently has my baby stopped sitting on my siatic nerve- I couldn’t walk, get up to check on dinner or even turn positions in the night without being in agony. And resting made it worse. I have been suffering with depression, but keep being passed around clinics to “get the best care”. I’ve given up. I have nothing for my baby. My partner doesn’t yet have a job- we both moved. Money is going down. I know he’s trying but that doesn’t magic up a pram, or a car seat. I just want my belly back. I want to feel in control again. I know that’s selfish. But I don’t know what to do. I don’t really know what I’m looking for in response to this. I just guess I wanted to talk to put it into words, and put it out somewhere.