First baby paranoia

[Preggers86]

Hi everyone,

Sorry for what might be a long post but as it’s my first post and the only site I’m currently registered on I feel I might go on a a bit. So from the age of 19 (I’m now 32) I have been told that I would need fertility treatment to conceive. After having all of the free nhs tests and consultations and being told that I would need fertility treatment which could get pricey (dp has other children) we decide that due to a change in our circumstances we would just carry on as we were. So fast forward to about 4 weeks ago when I’m constantly tired, can’t touch my boobs etc etc. A number tests carried out apparently confirm that I have in actual fact conceived naturally completely out of the blue.
This is currently where I am at I do not no how far gone I am due to very irregular periods so will only have a proper idea once I have had my first scan. Going from my last period I am being put at 10+4 however going from when my symptoms started I think I am more like 8+4. I am currently waiting for my 1st midwife appointment which is in 12 days and I am so paranoid that they are going to tell me that I'm not pregnant and that I have been imagining everything. As this is my 1st I have no idea what I am supposed to be feeling or going through and what is normal or not. So I’m just letting the paranoia of this can’t really be happening to me take over the feeling of excitement.

Is this a general feeling that all new expectant mothers go through? Or am I being over paranoid? As baby is still a secret I have nobody I can compare notes with.

Thanks

You are feeling completely normal! I felt the same way, and really it didn't feel real until my dd arrived.
It's very hard in the first few months as it seems like you don't have many appointments or checkups. Try not to worry too much, once you start having regular appointments, and going to antenatal classes and meeting other expectant mums it will feel more real.

@Preggers86 bless yah! You are not alone! I've wanted a baby for a very long time and even thi this pregnancy wasnt planned, I'm so terrified something will happen because I want this baby so much! I keep thinking some days that I'm not pregnant because I have such little symptoms and other days I'm convinced its all going to go wrong and I go to the toilet so often just to check!
What your feeling is so normal espically because you have been trying for so long! Were all hereto chat and moan and laugh when you need us espically in these first few weeks when we dont really feel like we have many people to talk to because it's so hush hush!

Completely normal! I booked a scan early as was sure something was wrong, my sister was the same, congratulations and know it is totally normal

Congratulations!

Don't expect too much from the first midwife appointment. They won't do a pregnancy test or examine you or do anything to confirm the pregnancy (as far as I know!) Until the 12 week scan they just take your word for it that you're pregnant.

First midwife appt is 'booking in', which means taking details and a bit of family history to work out what level of care you need and get you into the system. Not very fun and it takes ages.

The first scan is more exciting, I'd look forward to that if I were you! But pregnancy is a long thing, you just have to take each day at a time really.

Thanks everyone. I gathered that it was I think it's them pesky hormones and the fact that nothing has actually been confirmed and the waiting. I panic every time I go to the toilet and then there is the days when I don't feel at all. It's all so overwhelming and not at all what I imagined. But it's good to know I'm not alone.

OP congratulations on your pregnancy!
I'll compare notes with you - I'm 10+2 and feeling the same! Most of the time I don't really believe it's true, then a massive wave of nausea hits and I think there's obviously something going on! I made the mistake or borrowing my friend's home Doppler today to try and hear a heartbeat, but I couldn't find anything. I know that's just because it's too early and I'm not trained, but it still felt a bit shit. So don't so that! Hold out for your scan! Do you have a date for that yet or will they book it at your MW appointment?

Hi I'm also 10+2 with my first baby and the paranoia is so real! I can't wait for my scan on 1st May! I keep getting indigestion and some nausea. Also back ache. Fingers crossed for your first appointment and scan.

What you're "supposed" to feel is different for everyone. I was lucky and didn't really have any major issues throughout my pregnancy and every time I had a scan upto around week 20 I was so relieved that there was something there and I wasn't imagining it, and if I were in your situation then the magnitude would only be worse. Then I got a bump and constant kicks so I knew there was a baby growing but never really felt that pregnant as I just went about my life as normal and kept waiting for the point when I'd feel really pregnant. It never happened. I went into labour at 36+6 and it was just under 9 hours from the first contraction, so very fast for baby one, and I've apparently now got a 6 week old baby!! Ironically I had a conversation with my husband about when I'd start to feel "properly pregnant" on the day I went into labour, this was how not pregnant I felt!! This was around 4pm, the contractions started around 11pm and he was here by 8am.

I don’t think your alone in feeling that way at all! It’s made worse that most symptoms are similar to pms! I walked away from my midwife appointment feeling numb as no one had checked or confirmed I was pregnant with the exception of my home test so doubted myself heavily but at the 12 week scan it was well and truly confirmed! It’s not helped by having no symptoms either! Also with the dates don’t fixate on them as my midwife and every calculator said different to my scan date and I guarantee they will not come on time anyway! Congratulations on your pregnancy!

I feel the same I'm around 8weeks and I have some symptoms. However, I feel like they could be explained hybother things and I don't think we will really feel pregnant till we have a big bump and we've had a scan lol

I just think that because of my situation and being told that they was slim chance of it happening without intervention then I'm not allowing myself to believe that it could happen to me and that the timing was right.

It's just so overwhelming because one minute google is my best friend and the next my worst enemy. I expressed my concerns to the doctor that I read that ovarian cysts can give a positive results but she just seemed to brush it off.

On another note my maternity exemption certificate came today which had made me feel even more of a fraud because nothing has been confirmed.

I felt exactly the same. Dh and I had all the tests, told we'd need ivf and were on the waiting list when we conceived naturally. It felt so unreal. We decided on an early scan - about 7 weeks if I remember rightly. It still took ages to feel real though. I'm now 34 weeks and baby is kicking and rolling and and jabbing feet into my ribs and being a bit of a pain in all honesty!!