Daft things people say

[PatrickMerricksGoshawk]

I know there’s been a thread like this recently but I couldn’t find it!

Just had a conversation with my mum where she insisted that my due date must be wrong. I was with her around 2 weeks before I conceived and felt faint and had to sit down, which she took as being a definite sign that I was pregnant, even though I assured her at the time that I definitely wasn’t.

Today she brought it up again and said that they must have got it wrong at the scan, and that she thinks I’m a few weeks further along, because of the fainting!! I told her this was absolutely not the case, because I actually started my period on that day (which is why I remember it so clearly). Her reply? “Are you sure?” 🙄😬🤦‍♀️

She is actually lovely and very supportive, just slightly infuriating!

I work in a company which is almost all men. When we moved office the question of whether we needed a tampon dispenser in the loo came up and I heard my colleague tell facilities that she didn’t need one and that I was too old to need one.

Err, no ! Basic biology lesson needed I think.

"Oh, your bump's definitely gotten bigger since last time I saw you!"

I don't know why this really gets to me. It's such a pointless observation as that is indeed what is supposed to happen. With some people it happens every time I see them.

"You should try ginger!"

I know people mean well but when you've got Hyperemesis and been on 3 different tablets with none taking the edge off and they know you were signed off work for 10 weeks and still being sick multiple times a day at 28 weeks ginger isn't going to help 😑 I've lost count of the amount of people (including a Consultant) who told me it would solve my problems.

“Was it planned?!” asked by DF, many friends and even BOSS!

Oh, this was the best one.

When I told our receptionist at work, and she asked when I was due I responded “September ”

And she goes “This September, or next year?”

It took everything in me not to burst into hysterics in her face

Oh, God, all of these. I can feel myself getting annoyed all over again, remembering.

"Oh, your bump's definitely gotten bigger since last time I saw you!"

I think that one just used to drive me mad, because it's just such a fucking inane thing to say -- I got so sick of it that I used to deadpan 'I believe that's the way pregnancy works' and stare until they looked away. Often the same people had to be trained away from lunging at my bump. I think I once smacked one of their hands away in a lift at work, after several verbal warnings.

And ginger, when they've been recommending it for weeks, despite me telling them with increasing crispness that it does nothing for me, and I don't give a monkey's whether it saved their hairdresser's friend's cousin's life. All I did for me is give me ginger-flavoured vomit, and put me off certain cakes and biscuits for life.

“Your bump is tiny!”

Said by absolutely everyone. Really helps to alleviate my worries that baby is not growing well.

“If the baby is likely to stop breathing, it’s better that it does, and sooner rather than later.”

Said by my mother in response to the information that we are going to have the baby sleeping in our room because guidelines say that it is safer for the baby (among other reasons).

I’m not talking about many parenting decisions with her!