Accidental Identical Twin Pregnancy

[greyby25]

Hi, I'm 20 soon to be 21 with an 18 month old, expecting my second, so yesterday I had my 12 week scan and we were told we weren't expecting only one baby but two, and not only that they share a placenta, and so are identical MCDA twins. I have been in shock since then as I had no idea, we even had a scan at 8 weeks after a bleed at 7 weeks but one was hiding behind the other and because they share the same sac there was no evidence of a multiple pregnancy and I had no overwhelming symptoms. I have an appointment with a specialist next week and then growth scans every two weeks after 16 weeks.

My question is what do you ACTUALLY need two of... I'm already going to have to move house, I had already decided I was using reusable nappies and breastfeeding, and now I'm questioning if I can do that with twins or if it will be too much.

If anyone can give me ANY advice on coping, the things you actually need two of, what you can cope with one of, breastfeeding, and any advice on twins in general it would be a massive help, twins don't run in our families and I don't know anyone who has twins. Seriously any advice will be taken into consideration, I think I'm still in shock to be honest.

TIA. X

Hopeful bump x

I have no personal experience to share OP, but my (several!!) friends with twins all found a lot of support etc with the local branch of TAMBA (Twins and Multiple Birth Association). Worth seeing if there is one near you?

I was going to suggest TAMBA too. Good luck and congratulations.

hey and congratulations and I'm with you on the 12 week scan shock, taken me a while to adjust to the idea of twins (now almost 30 weeks).

I'm having a boy and a girl and have got lots of unisex clothes for the first few weeks - matching clothes obvs cost more and hard to get second hand but local twins groups have been a lifesaver for second/third hand clothes. Two car seats. One cot to start with until they're about 6 months (I have bought a cot bed that converts to toddler bed and will buy a second when theyre bigger) - some people put twins in one moses basket when small but its not recommended as risk of overheating. I have two.

one baby bath (or washing up bowl as I will be doing hehe), but two or more towels.

one bouncer might be enough, but you might want two - you'll need a safe place to put second twin when you're feeding/soothing the other.

lots of nappies - I am doing disposable at first because I can't face all the laundry, envisaging up to 20 changes a day between them...

Feeding pillow in case you want to try tandem feeding. I'm planning on ebf but open to combi feeding to give me a break.

These are my first kids so I'm sure something is missing, but good luck! Hopefully some people that already have twins will come along to help!

Both the nappies and the BF are perfectly possible with twins. I fed mine for two years and found it easier in a lot of ways than I think formula would have been. I did have a lot of support in scbu getting feeding established as mine were 34 weekers and spent 10 days in there. We also did cloth. The nappies are just a lot of washing - particularly as you already have a toddler. My DT are my only children (decided not to risk another set!). The feeding was a lot of sitting down as I tandem fed (a decent twin feeding cushion is a must) so I guess you'll need to have things to occupy your older one. Do you have anyone who can help you? (in addition to your partner). If you want to do cloth but find the washing too much you could do a mix with disposables?
Things you need two of. Not many! Just more nappies, clothes etc. I did have two bouncy chairs, two bath seats and two high chairs and twin specific stuff like the feeding cushion, twin pram. Mine slept in a one cot attached to my bed (IKEA hack one) ok mostly in my bed.
As said above TAMBA are great for advice and also do a course for expectant parents. If you have a local twins club they also often let expectant parents come along.
Good luck!

X-post with istef of course two car seats as she said!
I found 'mothering multiples' by Karen Gromada a good book - covers twin bf but also other aspects of twins.

Wrt nappies, do the advice questionnaire on www.thenappylady.co.uk. She really knows her stuff and will have dealt with multiples in cloth many times before!

Congrats OP, I too know the shock as found out o have DCDA twins at 12 weeks scan (currently 16 weeks). The shock has worn off now and I am excited although probably a little bit hurrying head in the sand for what's the come! I have a 2 yr old DS aswell. Hoping to BF but happy to combi feed if I can't manage. So far I am totally overwhelmed by all the different things I might need or options to get.

Congratulations!

Car seats are the big expense.
But 2 bouncy chairs, 2 high chairs 2 cots

Congratulations.

Yes definitely ask health visitor about twins club. We started our own still friends 10 years on.

Shared cot until 6 months and big enough to kick each other
2 bouncer chairs were handy for feeding
Colour coded bottles helped massively!
Breat feeding pillows are invaluable for twins
Lots baby grows
Don’t do the matching baby things - why would anyone want to change both kids if you don’t have too

@DustyDoorframes @LittleCandle @Hollowvictory I will definitely see about the twin groups, that sounds like it could be super helpful. I didn't even know groups for twins was a thing but sounds like something that could really help x

@lstef mine are identical and obviously too early to tell gender how I've bought lots of unisex baby grows etc, nice to know you're doing the nappies. Just seems like so so much washing ! X

@Taytotots I'm very close to MIL and my mother, partner is also in the picture so have lots of support but still seems very daunting with a just gone 2 year old when they will be due if we make it that far ! I'm very concerned about how early they will come. We are on growth scans every two weeks in 2 weeks so that will give us an indication of if they are growing together normally. Glad to see you found BF possible with two. I combi fed with my first and I was determined to fully BF with this one (now two !) x

@boodles101 sounds like you're in my position just further along ! Glad to know it's worn in for you. I'm in absolute shock ! Feels so strange that I've managed to make not one but two babies, whilst on contraception ! X

@GreenTulips was wondering about Moses basket / cot. I was presuming they will enjoy being close to each other so glad to know sharing a cot for a while is an option. Definitely not doing matching babies ! I'd never be able to tell them apart ! X

Thankyou for all other suggestions and the congratulations! Xx

@greyby25 once it's sunk in you'll be champion!
Most of the twins I know made to full term, and were fully breastfed (3 sets out of 5- one set is due shortly and still safely inside!), so there's every chance that can happen with you too. And if not you'll still be a brilliant mum to them- scary though it now seems!

@DustyDoorframes Thankyou ! I'm going to have a c section as with my last pregnancy I went to 40 weeks and had to be induced due to RFM, I don't want to go through that stress again and I did struggle to get her out, they were going to take me to theatre but I pushed when not having contractions as I didn't want to of gone through the whole induction process and all the pain and have to have forceps etc. I did end up with an episiotomy. With the c section they would likely be delivered around 37 weeks as my midwife said 37 weeks is considered full term in twin pregnancy x

37 is full term for any pregnancy - anything between 37 and 42 weeks. So 37 for twins is very respectable!

@DustyDoorframes why did I think 40 weeks was full term for a single pregnancy 🤦🏻‍♀️ my brain ! We shall see. I'm terrified of them coming early but I have a hunch they will make an appearance around 35 weeks but hey ho ! We won't know until it happens x

40 weeks is your due date- so you were not exactly wrong at all!

@DustyDoorframes it's confusing, but suppose it's all just a rough time frame ! I'm just hoping they don't develop the twin twin transfusion syndrome but if they do I'll cross that bridge when I come to it x

If you're on Facebook have a look at the breastfeeding twins and triplets uk page and join the group.