Helping DD accept sex of baby

[pancakes22]

Hi all

Any tips for getting DD excited for her new brother when all she talks about is how she wants a sister? (I know this is often a sensitive topic on MN but she is 3.5 so obviously can't help having these ideas about girls vs boys and so hopefully it's not as controversial as other sex/gender topics).
I keep telling her that baby will still love to play with her dolls etc and playing dress up regardless of whether they are a boy or a girl and talk to her about all her boy cousins that she plays with but she still constantly says she wants a girl which is starting to get a bit upsetting. Did anyone manage to overcome this and it so how did you best help to get your little ones excited for their new arrivals?

My little boy who's 4 adamantly wanted a brother, kept asking if he could have a "boy sister". In the end I just had to tell him he was getting a sister and explaining that the baby was a girl...with 2ish weeks to go he seems to be getting it 😅

I guess I’d just say our baby is what it is- just like you couldn’t decide if she was a girl or a boy. And use it as a chance to help her see that there are no such things as girl activities or boy ones. Maybe a sneaky praise of her being your best girl and him being best boy might go down well too. I’d be matter of fact though as 3.5 year olds can be contrary beings at the best of times... she will love her baby brother regardless. And hate him! 😂
(Is she a peppa fan- dd wanted a baby brother like George!)

I think just stop talking about it for a while. Not sure how long you have to go but it could get exhausting if you've months to go. It's very difficult to reason with 3 year olds as you know doubt know. When our 2nd DD arrived DD1 was very indifferent about her, despite the fact that she'd been hoping for a sister and she got one. The jealousy was there regardless and to be honest for the first few months she barely acknowledged her, mainly because she was a baby stealing mummy's attention. Your DD will come round to it, just don't stress yourself out trying to get her to accept it now - it's very difficult for her to even understand the reality of her getting a sibling, the sex of it is pretty irrelevant in the grand scheme of things.

Thank you all. I'm 27 weeks so still a way to go which is why I really wasn't sure whether the best way to go is to keep talking about it to get her used to it or just stay quiet as you say and see what she thinks when he arrives. One of the reasons we found out is to try and prepare her as much as possible but I suppose it's just accepting maybe it's going to be tricky her coming to terms with the fact there's a new baby regardless and the boy/girl thing is the easiest thing for her to verbalise at her age perhaps. Who knows! I just want to try and do everything I can to help her accept a new addition to the family so I think any slight comment she makes then makes me really paranoid as I know it's going to be such a big change.

I’m 35 weeks with a little boy and DD (3;3) was gutted when we told her it was a boy at 20 weeks. It took a bit of time and lots of indirect gentle comments (basically brainwashing!) but she’s now accepting it and quite excited about her brother. We didn’t directly address her wanting a boy but lots of comments like ‘your friend Lenny is fun, he’s a boy, boys are fun too’ etc...and like a previous poster said Peppa Pig helped!

We also bought some books about getting a new baby and made sure we talked about all the non gender specific things that would be fun like bathing the baby and tickling baby just to get her excited about baby regardless of gender.

Good luck - if she’s anything like my little one her opinion of the baby will fluctuate throughout the pregnancy anyway....

No advice, sorry, but DS1 was three when DS2 arrived. Throughout my pregnancy, not only was he adamant that it was a boy, but he'd also decided on the name (he'd heard us discussing, and latched onto one in particular).

I kept reminding him that it could be a girl, and we hadn't decided on a name, but he kept saying "yes, I know, but it is actually a boy and his name is .....".

And, obviously, because he's such a determined child, it was a boy and we had to call him the name he'd chosen.

Ah my daughter was like this. Every single time we mentioned it was a brother she would say sister. That was from the 20 weeks scan. I’m now 31 weeks and she totally accepts it’s a brother. We took a similar approach to pipandchew2 just kept subtly mentioning it, pointing our cool brother and sister relationships/ fun things her brother sister friends do etc. I’m sure she’ll be fine in the end :)

My eldest was like this, only wanted a sister. Said a brother would be the worst possible thing that could happen her. We found out and knew it was a girl but didn't tell her. I wouldn't have if it had been a boy as my gamble was once the baby is born and they see it then that's it, baby's here.

Thank you all that's reassuring xx