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Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

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Original poster

Missed Miscarriage at 12 Week Scan

21 replies

Tomandnic1 · 23/02/2019 14:42

Hi,
I had my 12 week scan yesterday to be given the devastating news that our baby had died at 8 weeks and 5 days. I’ve had no bleeding or cramping so this news was just the worst thing to hear. Having cried all night and talked about things I am booked in for a D&C on Monday.
I just wanted to hear some stories to see if this has happened to anyone else, and did you manage to successfully get pregnant soon after the procedure? Thank you.

OP posts:

BiggFactHunt · 23/02/2019 14:48

So sorry to hear this, it’s devastating.
Exact same thing happened to me, the only clue I’d had was I’d not developed morning sickness as I had with my two previous pregnancies.
Went for the 12wk scan and the sonographer asked if she could do an internal scan to see more clearly and she said the pregnancy hadn’t progressed past 7/8 weeks.
That’s was Friday in the January and they booked me in for D&C for the Monday. I was pregnant again by March and went on to have a successful pregnancy.

BiggFactHunt · 23/02/2019 14:50

*That was a flipping autocorrect

ppwonar · 23/02/2019 14:50

I had a mmc/blighted ovum in Sept/Oct last year and had a d&c mid October. Procedure was fine and it's recommend it as a way of getting things resolved efficiently. We didn't try in November, died December and January cycles and became pregnant mid Jan, so no obvious affect on fertility.

JoinTheDots · 23/02/2019 14:52

I am so sorry for your loss. I have been there, had my 12 week scan (at about 13 weeks) and the baby stopped developing at about 9.5 weeks. It was odd, because I noticed I had lost all my symptoms about that time, but did not think it might be anything to worry about.

I had a D&C about 3 days later, and it went very smoothly, I was home that same afternoon. Got pregnant on the very next month of trying. She is sat next to me now, and will be turning 5 next month.

Easterbuns1 · 23/02/2019 14:55

So sorry to hear about your loss. I had a mmc in September, positive scan with heartbeat at 8 weeks and then no heartbeat at 10+4. I went for medical management so can't comment on the surgery but emotionally I felt like I had been hit by a train, the process of grieving for something I felt I never really had was completely alien to me and although friends had lost babies I really had no idea how upset I would be until I had experienced it.

From a practical side there is a thread in the miscarriage section which I found very helpful, it can be hard reading but it helped me to prepare for my management and there's advice for surgical management on there too. I bled for about 5 weeks afterwards and the last week of that was my period restarting. I decided to try again pretty much straight away and I'm now expecting again and have my dating scan this week. Some people like to try again straight away and others need a little more time. Medically they just suggest you have a period first but that's mainly so they can date any new pregnancy.

Take care of yourself and do whatever you need to do, everyone's timescale with these things is different and I know my way of dealing with it was very different to my friend who experienced the same.

MrsBodger · 23/02/2019 14:55

I had bleeding and a scan showed an empty foetal sac - the foetus had been reabsorbed. But I had to have an op (EDPC I think?) which was a day procedure. I had Dd3 just over a year later.
Much sympathy for you - it’s horrible xxx

Chimmychunga · 23/02/2019 15:07

Oh darling. Im so sorry. I'm sending you all the love and hugs I have.

maxiflump1 · 23/02/2019 15:13

So sorry to hear this. I had a mmc in February last year and had a D&C. Fell pregnant again in May and my 3 week old DS is currently asleep on my lap. Be kind to yourself and good luck.

Original poster

Tomandnic1 · 23/02/2019 15:15

Thank you for your messages. It makes me feel better to know that I'm not alone and it does happen to lots of women. Also comforting to know that it hasn't affecting subsequent pregnancies. I just hate this time at the moment, feels like we're in limbo waiting for the surgery on Monday, hopefully after that we are able to move on.

OP posts:

MilkItTilITurnItIntoCheese · 23/02/2019 15:16

This happened to us with our 2nd pregnancy and I opted for medical management. Nature is so cruel. However I went on to have a successful pregnancy and our 2nd child was born within a year of the mmc. We had a third child with no problems too. It's a devastating thing to have to experience. I wish you well for the future.

currantbeings · 23/02/2019 15:50

We had a MMC back in June. I had an ERPC and was pregnant 3 months later.

Currently 25+4 weeks and June at the beginning of June.

missrose0110 · 23/02/2019 18:53

@Tomandnic1 I'm so sorry to hear you're going through this. The same things happened to us back in October. We went into the 12 week scan completely unaware that the baby had stopped developing at 8wk1day. It was such a shock and a hard thing to go through. We opted for surgery too which wasn't as bad as I expected, just emotional. We are now 8wk pregnant again and praying that the same thing doesn't happen again x

buddy79 · 23/02/2019 22:45

I’m so sorry for your loss. This happened to me at the start of March last year, and I had surgical management too. We started trying again straight away once i felt comfortable, and I conceived again in the August. I’m 7 months pregnant now and all seems to be well, so in answer to yr question, no, I don’t think it had any impact on fertility other than our being older. It’s a very difficult time, I really hope you can feel some healing after getting through the medical side.

ChoccyBiccyTastic · 23/02/2019 22:56

MMC with my 1st pregnancy. Now have 3 DCs! It is devasting and such a shock.

Came on to say that it did take 6 long months to conceive again after the m/c, which was horrible because I was so desperate. I conceived my other pregnancies in 1-3 months of trying... but the baby I so desperately wanted took 6 months (9 months from scan to BFP). So if it inexplicably takes longer, don't panic.

User12879923378 · 23/02/2019 23:28

This happened to me, almost exactly the same - scan at 12 weeks showed baby had died at around 8 weeks. We had previously seen a heartbeat on an early reassurance scan. In the weeks that followed I discovered that an awful lot of women who I'd been friends with for ages had had miscarriages before and between their children and had just never told me. It's very common and does not mean that you won't be able to have children later - I got pregnant again the following year and now have a toddler.

I'm so sorry, OP, it's such a terribly sad thing to go through

Original poster

Tomandnic1 · 28/02/2019 17:31

Thank you everyone for your messages. Sitting here now recovering from the ERPC I am feeling much more positive and uplifted from your happy stories. I’m so sorry you all had to go through it but you’re right! A lot of people just don’t talk about it but it happens so often.
My husband and I are looking to the future and hoping for a successful pregnancy this month, I don’t want to see the return of my dreaded period!!!
Hoping you are all alright xx

OP posts:

pitterpatterbaby · 28/02/2019 17:34

Love to you xxx I had this too my baby stopped growing at 8 weeks, all symptoms went and I didn't find out until 13 weeks. I can still remember the absolute feeling of being cheated. Everything you've hoped and wished for over the last 12 weeks gone. I successfully had 2 more babies after xxxx

currantbeings · 28/02/2019 17:40

@Tomandnic1 i hope the ERPC went well. Like you I felt much more positive and felt able to draw a line under it all.

I’m sorry anyone has to go through this. It’s heartwrenching. Wishing you all of the luck and positivity in the future. FWIW, we conceived quite quickly after my ERPC - within 3 months which was amazing considering the baby we had lost had taken 2 and a half years to conceive.

We’re all here if you need a moment to vent.

Babycakes1989 · 28/02/2019 17:44

I also had a mmc 5 months ago. Found out at 12 week scan that the pregnancy had stopped progressing at 8 weeks. I know exactly how you and all the other ladies feel 💐 just know your not alone and it was nothing you did. It took my head a few months to get around the fact that yes it was so cruelly snatched away but something wasn’t right and our bodies recognised it. I’m now nearly 10 weeks with my 2nd pregnancy and it took me 5 months to conceive. I wish you all the luck in the world, be kind to yourself 😘🥰 xx

Stinkytoe · 28/02/2019 17:47

I had a MMC when trying to conceive our second and had an ERPC

It took us a little longer than we hoped for another successful pregnancy but we ended up conceiving twins and everything went smoothly.

There’s no reason to think you won’t have a baby, even if it doesn’t happen this month it most likely will eventually x

Snowflake9 · 01/03/2019 19:37

I am so sorry to hear your news. I had a similar thing last may. I started bleeding a little on the Friday night of a bank holiday weekend. Went to out of hours GP. Said it was just a UTI and gave me antibiotics. The blood continued so I called 111 again. Long story short I was sent for a scan, they said the baby had stopped at 6 weeks. I was to leave it a week to see if there was any growth in case I got my dates wrong. After the most heartbreaking week of my life I returned for another internal scan. No change, I made the decision to have a D&c which was scheduled for a week later.

No one on this planet can understand the sheer grief and emptiness you feel, only those who have been through it . My advice to you would be to let yourself feel however you need to feel. Lean on those around you.

You are going to have some hard days ahead of you, but there is light at the end of the tunnel I promise you. The D&C was fine for me, no bleeding after or pain. I was able to return to work the next day.

On December 31st we found out we were pregnant again, I am pleased to say I am now 14 weeks pregnant and all is going well.

Just remember that this doesn't mean it's over, just not meant to be right now.

I wish I could give you a hug as I know how hard it is for you right now. X

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