Miscarriage at 40

[FantasticMrsfox78]

Hi, im posting for advice because I just feel so lost. I found out 3 weeks ago I was pregnant with my third at 40. At first we were so shocked and worried about how we would cope financially and practically, we contemplated termination however soon realised that it wasn't for us and we'd figure it out. I think it was just homones and panicking in hindsight. Then like lots of people I began so looking forward to it, planning etc however at the weekend I realised that my pregnancy symptoms were diminishing and yesterday I started to miscarry. Im still bleeding quite heavily and waiting for it to pass. I just feel so bereft about it all. I can't stop thinking about how things might have been and how my boys would have loved a little brother or sister. I feel guilty about how I reacted when I first found out I was pregnant. Im 40 and we've never used contraception in 4 years and this is the only time I've fallen pregnant so I also think that the odds of having another baby now are minimal. I just feel like I'm at war with myself. Ive still got the cot under bed and the baby clothes 'just in case' but it just seems like I'm kidding myself and my heads telling me to let go and be happy with my fabulous boys, but my heart just can't let go. I know it's early days after the miscarriage but just dont want to be stuck in this dilemma. Has anyone been through similar and what was the outcome? Thanks in advance ladies

Are you sure you are miscarrying?
I had two bleeds in early pregnancy. The second one was with huge blood clots and I hadn't miscarried and am now 24 weeks. Have you been to the GP, early pregnancy unit to confirm miscarriage? May be not all is lost, unless you are sure it's a miscarriage? In which case hugs! I had a miscarriage last year soon after I turned 40. I think it's awful at any age really. Keep posting to update the situation.

Thanks so much for your reply. I haven't had my miscarriage confirmed yet, I called my gp when the bleeding started on Tues night. He pretty much said it sounds like a m/c and to rest 🙄. The following morning I rang the early pregnancy unit for an appointment, i foolishly assumed I'd be seen the same day, but the earliest appointment they had is tomorrow, so I'm just waiting. I was sure it was a m/c as the bleeding was so heavy for almost 24 hours and cramping and nausea, however the bleeding stopped today. Im hoping it's something else but I don't know what. What was the cause of your bleeding if you don't mind me asking? Lovely to here that some have a happy ending x

Just wanted to wish you well for appointment tomorrow

I have had a MMC with no bleeding and a full term pregnancy with some bleeding

Miscarriage is awful at any age, my thoughts are with you 💐

My bleeding was straight after sex one time and the other time was 24 after sex. And we were careful, all was very gentle. The blood clots were huge, I really thought that was it.
Fingers crossed for you. It seems many women bleed during pregnancy especially early on.

Just to update everyone, the scan the other day showed that the little embryo is still there. I was so shocked after the enormous amount of bleeding 🙏, I really did think it was the end of the line. All the blood was from me apparently. I had a haemorrhage in the uterus which caused all the bleeding, i could see lots of lumps of blood still in there. They are keeping an eye on me to make sure the lumps of blood are from the haemorrhage and not fibroids but I know I'm incredibly lucky. After waiting 3 days for my hospital appointment thinking Id miscarried, I appreciate even more now the heart ache that so many brave ladies have to endure due to mc. 💗 xx

What a lovely update! Hope the rest of your pregnancy is uneventful!

Love this update

Oh that's an amazing update OP! Let's hope it's a bit smoother for you from here on in

Thanks ladies. The bleeding was heavier than a period and I couldnt think of anything that may have caused it eg sex, heavy lifting etc and the doctor I called said it was probably a miscarriage. After googling like crazy I couldn't find any likely alternative causes. Hopefully other ladies with sudden heavy bleeding might see this post and know that all may not be lost 🤞💗xx.

Congratulations OP! Here’s to a continuing healthy pregnancy

I’ve known a few people this has happened to - one had a Subchorionic haemorrhage, one a cervical erosion, and the other was unexplained. All babies were born healthy.

What lovely news. I think this just shows that every pregnancy is different and there really is no telling what the outcome will be.

This is such lovely news. I also started bleeding 2 weeks ago & was convinced I was having my third miscarriage however we had a scan last week and showed everything was all ok with the baby. Wishing you well for the rest of your pregnancy x

Hi ladies, I just wanted to update you. We went for a follow up scan yesterday but unfortunately the baby's heart stopped beating last week some time 😔. Missed miscarriages are so cruel. I'm still a bit numb but it's good to know others have more positive outcomes, I guess I've just been unlucky. Best of luck ladies 💐💜 xx

So sorry for your loss