I feel so alone in this pregnancy

[PineapplePrincess]

Currently 35+4. Have struggle with SPD since 20wks, generally find moving around difficult and exhausting. Still working, finish up Friday. Heartburn and acid reflux is the worst. Have had a persistent cough since October, and now pretty much stress incontinent. To add to the misery I have bad toothache for the third time, which the dentist has resigned to swollen gums and will only improve post baby arrival.; painkillers are barely working.

I accept I’m probably not the best person to be around. If I’m not sore, or tired, I’m on the brink of tears because I have just peed myself for the umpteenth time. I feel smell and dirty.

But I do get up every morning, put on a brave face go to work or try to do a ‘normal’ days activity (with DH and DS4) without complaining.

I just feel I get no sympathy or support from DH. It is obvious I’m struggling, I’ve tried to explain how I’m feeling, but it doesn’t seem to register with him. If I try to make the effort he moans its not up to standard, if I try to concede and sit an activity out I’m considered lazy.

There is no hugs or affection, no positive words or reassurance - he doesn’t even slow his walking pace to allow me to keep up. If anything my coughing annoys him and my struggles are an inconvenience.

I feel so alone. I don’t feel like I have any support or anyone to talk to. And I could really do with just a hug.

Your DH sounds like an utter cunt sorry to be blunt but how nasty to treat you that way. I'm 38+3 weeks and from 33 weeks till 37 weeks suffered terribly with SPD and sciatica but where the baby's head has now engaged the pain has eased off to a mild moderate pain if I overdo things but walking is a million times better. But my DH would never have treated me as a nuisance, would help me with DS who is 3 as much as he could even though he's working 7 days a week and late evenings renovating our home as well as running a building firm.

Sorry but husbands are there to be 'moaned to' in late pregnancy - who else better, they helped make the baby! They should just suck it up & be a listening ear and a hand to hold & tell us we look fabulous even if we are a large waddling lump of goo!

Try to speak to him & tell him how his vile attitude is making you feel. Also perhaps book yourself a pregnancy friendly spa treatment - on HIM!- and rest up a little bit.

Ladies disposable pants (like elderly people wear) are fab for wee leakages and you won't feel wet or smelly, I used them for running all the time before I fell preg again- they soak everything up perfect.
Hope you feel better soon

You poor thing, sounds bloody awful. To be frank, he's being a twat.

What was he like during your first pregnancy? What is your relationship like generally?

Do you have friends or family you can talk to?

So sorry you're feeling so low.

Can you talk to your midwife or DR? They might be able to help with some of the physical bits at least.

Would you find giving yourself a little treat helpful? I found giving myself a manicure, getting my hair done (I'm not girly so usually a no go for me), or doing whatever usually gives me a mental break from life really helpful when I've felt a bit low and my body is grossing me out. It's a small thing and I know it doesn't solve the big stuff but it may help in a small way. Be kind to yourself, you're doing an amazing job.

We're here to listen. Lots of love and hugs. x