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Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

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Original poster

Community midwives

18 replies

CatsOnCatnip · 07/02/2019 13:47

Don’t get me wrong, I feel very lucky to live in a country where we have NHS care. Thankfully I haven’t had to use it a lot.

However, I’m pregnant with my first and the community midwives at my gp surgery seem a bit disorganised and disinterested. I’m at the end of my pregnancy now, but throughout I have barely seen the same midwife twice, they didn’t chase up abnormalities on my scan (fibroids) until pushed. They have given very limited vague information on everything, handing out a booklet, basically. if it wasn’t for the internet I would still be very naive to a lot of things. They don’t really seem to want to engage or for you to ask any questions. The last time I went another new (to me) midwife seemed totally confused as to why I’d gone in for a third scan (growth scan, measurements wrong) and kept getting how far along I was wrong despite having my notes in front of her. Then to top it off, I log on to my maternity app today to see if the results of a possible UTI were on there from my last visit to find they’ve logged me in as having visited today with stomach pains (I haven’t and I don’t) and no details of my previous visit 2 weeks ago.

I feel bad having a moan. I know i’m one of many pregnant ladies they see, and they’re probably busier than they seem. I’m slightly overdue now, I’m probably just being a bit miffed and hormonal. Did anyone else find their community midwife experience a bit lacking? Just doesn’t seem like a job you’d want to get into if you were a bit non-plussed about it.

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BettyWoo · 07/02/2019 20:06

I haven't actually seen a midwife yet as I'm only eight weeks, but my best friend is a psychiatric nurse and her team have been short-staffed forever, morale is ridiculously low, rushed off their feet all the time struggling to find the resources to treat even urgent cases. It's probably the same for the midwives. I know it doesn't make it any better for you and it sounds like you're definitely getting a much poorer service than you deserve, but that's probably how it is. Honestly, I'm expecting the same. My booking in appointment isn't till I'm nearly twelve weeks. Fingers crossed for a much improved birth experience for you

Wedgiecar58 · 07/02/2019 20:09

My experience is slightly different but agree that it’s lacking.

1st pregnancy and had my 1st appt with community midwife this morning. I made this appt at 5 weeks and I’m now almost 10 weeks. I went along expecting to go over medical history, be weighed & have bloods taken.

1st question she asked was where I wanted to give birth of which I wasn’t 100% sure so we talked through options. She then gave me a bunch of leaflets, Emma’s Diary etc and told me that I have to inform her my hospital choice by tomorrow (!!) and she’ll book me in there, that’s where i’ll have bloods taken, get booked in for my 12 week scan etc.

The midwife was lovely, it was just a bit of an anticlimax and don’t really understand why i’ve been kept waiting til nearly 10 weeks for that? Surely if they saw me say 3 weeks ago I would have had longer to research my birthing centre options etc.

curlywurlywooo · 07/02/2019 20:37

I didn’t have a booking in appointment til I was 12 weeks (I didn’t bother getting in touch til I was 10 weeks gone) and my community midwife is lovely. She did the second half of the appointment at home with me and DH. She’s so calm and sweet and answers any questions I have and chases things up straight away.

Flamingosnbears · 07/02/2019 20:44

It's sad really, the reality is that you feel your just a number in the system...

Teddyreddy · 07/02/2019 20:46

My experience is they are very hit and miss, there are a couple everyone at my pregnancy yoga group (for DC2) used to complain about. It wasn't that they weren't the most friendly - it was the incompetence, referrals just not happening, bloods being taken but then going missing, forgetting to do things like measure blood pressure. ..

I'm on DC3 and this time round actually asked to see someone I know is very good from DC1 and DC2. She's squeezing me in as officially she now covers a different surgery to mine, fingers crossed it all works out as it's quite stressful having a midwife you don't trust not to get something wrong....

stayhomeclub · 07/02/2019 20:54

I agree, my experience has also been lacking. I feel like I’m on a conveyor belt. She runs through the appointment with me and there is no room for questions. At my last appointment I had two questions and I’d barely got my words out each time before I was told it was nothing to worry about. That advice might have been correct but I didn’t feel listened to at all. I ended up booking a private scan for reassurance. It’s also quite sloppy with some poor practice, things being noted as discussed with me in the notes when they haven’t been, my blood group is incorrect (need to sort this out), and on and on. I’m rrally struggling to trust them with my care.

Angelmiracle · 07/02/2019 21:15

They really are so short staffed. You feel like a nuisance to them. But I just have all my questions prepared (in my head) so when midwife is doing checks or consultant doing scan I start immediately with the questions before they have me out the door again.

But this is DC2- didn't always know what I needed to ask as a FTM it can be overwhelming.

welshsoph · 07/02/2019 21:26

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster

CatsOnCatnip · 07/02/2019 21:59

Don’t get me wrong, I totally understand that the NHS is over stretched, I have family members who work within the system and everyone is trying their absolute best. My GP’s have been great when I’ve been, long waiting time, but I get that. The hospital staff have on the whole been very good the few appointments I’ve had and they are indeed very busy. But there’s something just a bit vague and disinterested about the midwives (bar one older lady I had once who was wonderful and finally chased my scan results). I’m not one to complain usually, I’m just so grateful I work around and know lot of informative women so that I’ve been armed with (hopefully) all the information I need.

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Purplepricklesalloverhisback · 07/02/2019 22:03

It must be on area as I saw my community midwife for booking at 8 weeks (bloods, medical history etc). She organised 12 week scan in my local women’s centre (which doesn’t do delivery) and said I could think about where to give birth over a few weeks. I’ve seen same midwife throughout and it’s the same one I saw with my DS 2 years ago.

Original poster

CatsOnCatnip · 07/02/2019 22:07

stayathomeclub I also went for a couple of private scans. They ended up being very reassuring and helpful.

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Buddytheelf85 · 10/02/2019 11:42

I know what you mean OP. My community midwife is nice but my appointments with her are always so so rushed that they feel a bit pointless. It’s partly the surgery’s fault, their admin is dire - they always overbook her or book people for the wrong day, etc - so she ends up under pressure. I also see her make mistakes, I assume because she’s so rushed - things like she’s recorded the foetal heart rate from my last appointmentwrong in my notes, she said out loud to me that it was 150 and she’s written 145 in my notes, etc.

It’s a real shame - I bet they’d like to provide a better service!

seeingdots · 10/02/2019 22:22

Sorry to hear your experience hasn't been great. It must be so variable between areas and with different caseloads on the teams. Our local community midwife team are amazing, I've felt very supported through both my pregnancies. I just hope this time round I get to give birth in their care instead of in the hospital.

wombatron · 10/02/2019 22:40

I tried to call and text mine Friday. Still no response. I was quite keen on this as an idea but so far I haven't been blown away. One told me at my booking app they'd call me with my bloods. I followed up a week later as I hadn't heard anything to be told by my main midwife that she'd go through it with me at my 16 week appointment. I just don't really see how I'm supposed to go through my entire pregnancy never receiving any guidance.

PolaroidsAndCamperVans · 11/02/2019 09:51

I feel like I'm one of the rare ones who always saw the same community midwife. I actually saw the same lady for both DC1 and DC2!
Though I do have to agree that each appointment was rushed, but when I was pregnant with DC2, I didn't mind the whole 'in and out' feel as I just wanted to get back home and rest ha.
Due my booking in appt on Wednesday for third pregnancy - keeping my fingers crossed I see the same lady again and we can chuckle some more over how close all of my pregnancies have been

Rememberallball · 11/02/2019 10:00

Not met my community midwife team yet but already get a feeling of uneasiness from the fact I was given a pack by the GP surgery which contained a phone number to call if no appointments available and, because I’m away from 5+4 to 10+5 (already away) and because this is an ivf pregnancy, I was told to call the number on the letter and speak to the midwives before I went away. I rang on the Monday (day I was given the pack) but hadn’t heard anything by the Friday so rang the surgery to ask if there was another contact number - apparently the number on the letter is for the children’s centre not the clinic where the midwives are actually based and they would probably never have got the message left on that answerphone. So I could have gone away and missed letters with appointments simply because of an incorrect phone number - can’t understand why they’d put a number not connected to their office/team on a letter telling expectant mums to contact them if no appointments available!!

Doesn’t fill me with confidence for the next 7 months!!

Wedgiecar58 · 12/02/2019 14:59

FFS, just coming back to this thread to say that following my 1st appt with the community midwife last week, she said she was going to refer me to the hospital and to wait to hear from them re a booking in appt.

I haven't heard anything so I gave the hospital a ring, and they havent recieved my referral.

Called and text the midwife, phone was off.

Called my GPs and they've left a note on my file for her to pick up when she will be in on Thursday!

AIBU to be pissed off?

I just want a booking in appt - I am now over 10 weeks and no medical history has been discussed and no bloods taken.

A colleague of mine told me not to rely that anyone will have done their jobs correctly and to always chase up to ensure. I'm disappointed because I really like the community midwife but I don't want to be chasing incompetencies throughout my pregnancy.

I understand the NHS is incredibly stretched but this is my 1st pregnancy and I feel like I've been completely left to my own devices.

Feeling fed up!

whitetoblerone · 12/02/2019 15:15

I know what you mean about community midwives. They were all lovely to me so I have no complaints there but, even though I would mostly see the same one, she would ask me every single time 'is this your first baby?' And every time I had to say 'no, it's my 2nd but my first baby died after birth'. It would have been nice if she could have quickly read my notes before my appointment because it was quite distressing having to remind her every time!

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