Anyone else worry over every little thing?!

[sunshinegirl12]

Hello

I’m currently 11weeks pregnant with a very longed for first baby, it has taken us 4 long years and 7 IVF cycles to get to this point, I never thought we would get here and I would love to be able to enjoy it but instead I am a nervous wreck! I constantly focus on things that I may have done to harm the baby, to name a few my previous obsessions have been long bumpy car journeys (this was a HUGE worry for me for weeks at the start!), smelling gas from the hob, smelling cigarette smoke on other people, getting mad at DH for slightly burning dinner in the oven and worrying about the smoke etc etc. I google them obsessively until I’m reassured enough but it’s never long until I get something new to zone in on...

My current list of worries are; fumes that I can smell in my car from other car exhausts on my commute, stresses at work (nothing too major but to the point I can feel myself getting irritated and heart rate speeding up), and lastly today at work while running the fire drill I was standing under the very loud alarm for a fair few minutes ticking everyone off, I have been so worried about the noise harming the baby!

I am driving DH mad with my list of worries, he tells me he thinks it’ll be ok and all I can say is ‘well how do you know?!’ I know babies are sturdier than we give them credit for and that most of my concerns are irrational, but it almost feels like this is my one chance and I feel like I’m doing so many things to risk it. Oh how I would love to wrap myself in cotton wool and stay in the house for the next 6 months!

Just wondering if anyone else has been like this?! xx

Unfortunately I suffered multiple miscarriages so I was up the wall with worry every second of the day.

I had a frank talk with myself and decided that by being so stressed it may be me that was causing harm.

Understanding that the baby IS actually wrapped in layers upon layers of you, safe, snug and pristine because you filter out smells, sounds, fumes and none of it gets to your baby, maybe you can think more logically.

I get it though, I went to a concert when I was 6 weeks pregnant and put my coat over my tummy to protect the baby’s ears!! Ffs, I did have a work with myself after that.

You deserve to enjoy each moment of your pregnancy because it’s your time and your turn.
You are letting things ruin it for you.
Millions of baby’s are born healthy under awful circumstances, yours is not.

Treat yourself, allow the joy to overtake you. You’ve waited too long and gone through way too much to not drink in every minute of happiness that you deserve.
X

I get it OP. My current list of worries includes:

• that I drank alcohol before realising I was pregnant
• that I used a decongestant nasal spray at about 6 weeks pregnant without realising I shouldn’t
• pollution
• toxoplasmosis
• listeria
• chicken pox (my parents aren’t sure if I had it when I was little)
• all toiletries I use - shower gel, make-up etc
• stress at work and my blood pressure
• having baths - are they too hot??

I don’t have any advice but I just want you to know you’re not alone!

Thanks both for your responses.

Crosser62, I know what you’re saying is right, I just need to find a way to get my head to start thinking that way.

Buddy, I’m sorry you are dealing with a similar list of worries, but it does make me feel better to know I’m not the only one. How far along are you?

Xx

Yup this was me, multiple failed ivf cycles and when I did eventually succeed I pretty much developed health anxiety/ocd. I think going through ivf makes you a bit mad, and then going straight from ivf to pregnancy gives you no time to get over the trauma and all the terror just gets pushed into the pregnancy. And of course the fear of something going wrong is huge. Ds is ten weeks now and I am much more normal so it does improve! I tried to remind myself I was being crazy. Dh was very tolerant - I would say i know I’m being nuts but please just humour me and rewash that carrot 😂

Yes. I'm 26 weeks and still worrying now I went out last Friday and was wondering about the loud music hahah. Also worry about chicken pox, movement, squashing her when I bend, if my shower is too hot, what food I eat. It's ridiculous but midwife said very normal especially after 2 losses. Just trying to think positive xx

@sunshinegirl I’m 16 weeks. But, even though I’m still an anxious wreck, I have to say I found the stage you’re at really really stressful. You haven’t had your 12 week scan so you have the worry of that looming, along with the fear of miscarriage. Plus I don’t know about you but I kept it a secret, so I didn’t have anyone to talk to apart from my DH. And I didn’t have any early scans so there was always this wonder - am I actually pregnant? And on top of that, in your case you’ve been through a hell of journey even to get to this point! Hardly surprising you’re a tad anxious.

I’m still an anxious lunatic but I was worse before my 12 week scan and I think (hope!) I’ll improve some more after my 20 week scan.

I’m definitely not the person to be giving advice on being rational but I try to focus on is that the vast majority of babies are healthy. Despite pollution and bumpy roads and loud music and fire alarms and burnt dinners and stressful jobs! There are 7.5 billion humans on the planet. We’re by far - by FAR - the most numerous mammal on the planet. We wouldn’t have got here if we weren’t fairly resilient!

Btw I’ve also found pregnancy yoga helpful for managing anxiety and staying calm generally 😊 xxx