FAMILY ISSUES

[tinytinker93]

So I recently found I'm pregnant, it was totally unplanned as I was on contraception but since my sister found out she's barely spoken to me and apparently is furious I'm pregnant again, she suffers PCSO and is struggling to have a baby and I'm heartbroken for her but she's just become such a horrible person since finding out I'm pregnant 😞 I don't know what to do and know one in the family is happy I'm pregnant either, what do I do?

Are you happy you're pregnant?? That's the most important question you should be answering first (and I say that as someone who needed ivf to conceive and struggled with infertility, so may understand a bit about how your sister feels).

Even though it was unplanned I'm so over the moon x

I can understand her being upset but your family are out of line to be not be happy you're having a baby. It may take her time to get used to the idea, especially if she knows it was unplanned. Congratulations.

It must be difficult for your sister. I don’t know enough about your situation to know why the rest of your family wouldn’t be happy but maybe they are not sure how to react especially if they’re not sure you are happy. Maybe just get on with things and if they know you’re happy they’ll support you. As for your sister maybe just don’t rub it in if you can help it as it must be hard to witness your sister (or anyone) just get pregnant by accident if you are having difficulting TTC but it at least sounds like you are happy and appreciate it. Good luck with your pregnancy. I hope you’re family comes round.

I can't believe that nobody in your family is happy, WTF is wrong with them??

Congratulations OP. What type of things is your sister doing to be horrible? There is a level at which I think empathy goes a long way, but once it tips into plane cruelty and meanness, I lose all sympathy.

But for nobody else to express happiness at your news is despicable.

I'd send your sister an email or text letting her know that you're giving her some space and that you hope she understands that you haven't done this to spite her, that you're aware it might not be ideal for her, and most of all that you love her.

Honestly, you need to ignore that she's being nasty. It's so so so common for people suffering from infertility to have crazy low self-esteem, be depressed or even suicidal. So try to be sympathetic and give her time for her grief (and it is grief).

Let her know you're around when and if she feels ready to talk.

My family aren't happy I'm pregnant due to my physical health, when I found out I was pregnant I diccused my health with my GP and he gave 2 options 1.have the baby before my health gets so bad I won't ever be able to carry again or 2. Have an abortion and have no more children I was already set on this baby and I was given a choice and I made it, ive not mentioned anything pregnancy related to my sister so not to upset her but she refuses to speak to me and has gone as far as to refuse to speak to her nephews over FaceTime and it's heart breaking as there only little and can't understand why auntie won't talk to them anymore, I know she's hurt and I wish she wasn't going through what she is but I feel she's being spiteful taking it out on my boys x

Her issues are not your fault- if it wasn't you she would be mad at someone else who was pregnant. It must be awful for her but she shouldn't be taking it out on your kids or you!! You should be happy and feel confident about your pregnancy- not worries to be talking about it.
If you had an abortion you would never get this chance again.
Your family should be pleased for you- please do not let yourself get down :( xxxx