Always worrying about movement etc (34 weeks)

[AliceRR]

I just wondered whether it’s normal to worry so much about something being wrong. I have no reason to think it is but was so worried in first trimester that something would be wrong at first scan and then worried before 20 week scan. Since then I’ve found myself worrying about movements. The fact is they change over time, in my experience, and some days baby is more or less active than others. It’s as if there comes a point at a certain time or day and I can’t remember how much baby has moved and then I worry until I feel substantial movements.

Baby seems to have moved head down now and I have been feeling a lot of pressure low down, which still probably amounts to movement as it’s not a constant sensation, but I’m still waiting for today’s “familiar” movements in front of bump to feel satisfied everything is ok...

🤞

I know I’m definitely anxious during this pregnancy

I’m 33 weeks, don’t have any advice but I hear you. I have front facing placenta so movements have always been muted. My baby has been breech, transverse , back to breech ( I know this from growth scans and working with a chiropractor to try and turn him) so depending on positioning I can get some awesome strong punches or very glittery movements. Last week I was sick with lurgy and think I missed a lot of movements due to my coughing and exhaustion and basically got myself in a state so went in for monitoring. I’ve been stressed at work and then routine change over holidays so the patterns that were difficult to decipher before now seem all over the shop. A constant worry. Hopefully someone will be along soon with more tangible advice.

Thanks for your reply @Blondiecub0109

I had one instance of going in for monitoring also, about 3 weeks ago. My husband thinks I was making a fuss and maybe I was but my midwife said to go in if in doubt and I was a bit worried. My gut feeling was everything was fine but I knew I wouldn’t settle unless I felt a lot of movement or the hospital staff said everything was ok.

Today I’ve only felt movement low down but that’s cause baby has clearly moved and. It is surely a good thing if I am still feeling it.

Hopefully will feel some kicking when I lie down later when I get home!

Most of the advice conflicts and isn’t helpful. Even the hospital staff, after monitoring me, ultimately said it comes down to whether I feel ok with movements. I thought what was the point of coming in then?! 🙈😬😂

If the movements have changed go in and get them checked. My babies developed a rare heart condition some time after my 20 week scan, it eventually caused my first baby to go into heart failure, excess fluid built up around her and muddled her movement, I still felt big movements but less 'chatter' I guess. I posted a thread on here about it and got told it was normal (this was several years ago). But it isn't! Well it most likely is, but there is always that tiny tiny chance it's not so if worried get checked, the midwives will be lovely about it and reassure you you've done the right thing and youl be able to relax for abit knowing your baby has had an extra check and is doing fine.

I'm sorry I don't mean to scaremonger, the chances of something being wrong are soooo slim, my doctor told the chances were like being struck by lightening so it won't be what happened to me, but if your concerned/curious enough to spend time thinking about it, then it's time to have a check up to be on the safe side.

I was like this last time too. I did have two missed miscarriages prior so I think that caused it more than anything. I was convinced throughout the first trimester I’d had another missed miscarriage then when he was fine, I worried there would be an abnormality at the 20 week scan. Then it switched to worrying about premature labour and movements. I was paranoid as hell he would be stillborn. He is now nine weeks old and absolutely fine.

An element of worrying is normal but if it’s taking over your whole mentality, maybe ask your midwife.

I’m not sure if it’s taking over but I think about it quite often and if there are a few hours where I don’t feel much then I worry

And I don’t feel like I should go to the maternity assessment centre each time either as I’d be there several times a week!

Sorry to hear of your previous experiences.

I’m going to see how I feel overnight. I did have a bit of a rub of my tummy and baby was moving around a bit (I can see and feel something sticking out at the front sometimes, like a foot or a knee, and that’s what I didn’t feel as much of during the day, more movements low down (like the head maybe) but then that’s not so unusual for me

I need to learn to work out how to distinguish real reason to panick from my anxieties

It is very natural to worry about movement on your pregnancies. There is an organisation called kicks count in the UK who are trying to change the mindset that your baby stops moving as much towards the end towards the end of pregnancy and movement should stay similar. They have bracelets and charts that help you to monitor your baby's movement that can help to track and alleviate your anxiety.

But always at the end of the day if you are worried go to your midwife/hospital and be monitored.

If you think movements have reduced, you must call the unit and let them know. I had an anterior placenta in both pregnancies so felt a lot less than many. I went in to be monitored quite a lot and was never made to feel as though I was over fussy. They insisted I go in actually.
Reduced movements or a change in movements isn’t necessarily a reason to panic but it is a reason to check.

Oh and never wait til the morning to see how you feel. They’re 24 hour.

That’s what my MW says: to go to the hospital if I’m doubt. I’m sure this is the correct approach.

The thing is my gut feeling is usually that everything is ok and I know not to go to the assessment unit after worrying about a “quiet” few hours as that is actually quite normal for me. I have many days (and always have) where I haven’t felt much all day and then she gets going again. She was v active last night and this morning she was moving around and I’ve felt her moving around today. It tends to be either in the morning / night when I’m in bed that I feel her moving a lot or when I’m active and then sit / lie down or when I eat something, which I think is fairly normal, but it causes me anxiety to worry about when to call.

The movements do feel a bit different now as I know she’s changed position and I’m feeling a bit of pressure low down but again the movements have changed (but not reduced) over the course of my pregnancy as she’s grown and moved position.

I think I need to follow my instincts as I suppose I kind of know what is “normal” for me and some days are a bit more active than others but I will go in to be checked if I think there’s a problem.

It just seems like a massive responsibility that it’s all on me to know if something is wrong if that makes sense as there is no clear guidance other than to call the hospital if you’re worried but what if you’re suffering from anxiety and almost always worried?!

Sorry there probably isn’t really an answer to that other than to let MW know how I’m feeling which had been suggested.

@AliceRR I feel just now you do, although I am slightly behind at 30 weeks. The hospital suggested to me that I drink/ eat something sugary then lie on my side for an hour. Then, I did feel some movement. It’s felt close to my back- so I’m thinking that baby is facing that way. When I phoned the hospital back, they didn’t seem concerned, but I could go in if still worried. I’m always going to worry! Kind of wish that they just told me to go in.
They did say that movement can change about now. There may be more rolling than kicking feelings. Have you felt this? X

@Beherenow32 Yes I think the movements have changed due to there being a clear change in position and size of baby. I feel a foot or knee prodding into the front of my bump and what feels like baby’s bum or something and over the last couple of days I’ve been feeling more low down.

Some days I feel “big” movements but this might be once or twice a week and in between I always feel movement at some point in the day. If I drink something and then lie down, or just lie down, I usually then feel something. The one time I didn’t was when I went to the hospital but then of course I felt movement as soon as I got there!

I did find it slightly unhelpful though as they monitored me but then said the main thing was whether I felt ok with movement. I kind of just wanted some reassurance!

I’d actually be happy with calling them and them giving me some reassurance over the phone but my MW said that they should always encourage us to go in if we’re worried. I called one other time but at about 24 weeks and the MW I spoke to them said not to worry as it’s too early to establish a pattern and my regular MW was shocked at this.

People seem to have different approaches as to when to be worried, when to go in, whether / how movements change etc. It would be easier if there were some clear guidance but of course every baby / pregnancy is different x

@AliceRR sounds very similar to me then. I have phoned in 3 times now.... first was also around 24 weeks and they listened to the heartbeat.
I also have an anterior placenta. Which prob isn’t helping if that’s bigger. I know that I should go in if worried, but tbh, I’m always worried!

Hope you get some reassurance xx

I was just explaining to my partner that he doesn't get how much responsibility and stress it is to have to be constantly thinking about it. It gets worse the closer you get to the birth I think because you know if they come out now they'll in all likelihood be ok so if you make the wrong decision and something happens you could have avoided it. It's horrid.

I was convinced I had reduced movement yesterday and I probably did have less than I usually do, but he was v active in the night and this morning so I've relaxed a bit. If you are out doing stuff you notice it less too and then have a bit of a panic when you've not thought about for a while! Exhausting. The midwives are very very strong on saying don't hesitate to contact them for stuff like this but I suspect they are not always as accommodating when you pitch up at the hospital and everything's fine....

To be fair I could be in there every other day with something being wrong so I really have to rein myself in.

@Beherenow32 Yes exactly. I have posterior placent but that almost adds to the worry as I don’t have an explanation for when I feel less movement for short periods 🙈 I can feel her moving now so feel better but it’s like I’m constantly thinking about it

@costacoffeecup Exactly, that’s it. It’s a lot of responsibility and seems like it falls on us alone and you can’t help but worry what if something’s wrong and you ignored it... DH just thinks everything is fine and I’m worrying over nothing which is probably right (I hope). When I went to the assessment unit they were ok with me but I didn’t feel overly reassured anything they did and it just seemed like they had other things to be doing but I think if I was really worried then I’d try to insist they did more.

I was very anxious during my pregnancy.
I paid for a harmony test (at £300 or something!) and extra scans. I had an anterior placenta and felt no movement until 26/27 weeks.
My baby was born and once I could see him then I totally calmed down- thank goodness. I just needed to be able to see he was ok and I found it much easier once I could just have him in my eyeliner. I was surprised by how relaxed I was when he came.
So don’t worry about how much you might worry in the future. I worried about what type of mother I would be.
It’s just naturally a very anxiety inducing time. It really is. It’s normal.

I started to meditate every morning. I told myself and my baby out loud that they were healthy and strong and growing. And that my body was looking after them and keeping them safe. And that all was safe and sound.
Psychologically I tried to think about my anxiety potentially changing the cortisol levels in my body and the thought of the anxiety reaching them was enough to calm me down.

I did end up feeling reduced moevements more than 3 times and was therefore pushed into an induction. I actually didn’t want one and had daily traces instead. Until it went on quite a while and had an induction.. luckily once labour started things progressed naturally.
The nurses were I was happy to see me and check the heartbeat every time.
If you have concerns then do go.

I think it's pretty normal to be constantly monitoring at this stage to be honest. Just got to hang on in there for a few more weeks! And you think the anxiety will go when they arrive but it's just a different sort of anxiety! Glad this is definitely my last pregnancy!

Yes exactly I really don’t mind being pregnant at all but I’m so lookin forward to having the baby obviously so I can meet her but also because I know this will continue to be an issue and the fact is I’m not going to call the maternity assessment unit every other day but I will call if I think something is wrong.

I know people always worry about their children so I will still worry when she’s here but in a different way. I think it will be different when I can see she’s ok though and can share the worry with DH!

@AliceRR how are you feeling today? I’m sure that I have been feeling some movement. But it’s changed so much. More rolling/ pressure feeling, and little taps close to my pelvis 😖 xx

@Beherenow32 I feel better today thanks. I felt her moving a lot last night and again today. I think the movements will change according to baby’s position and space but they say the movements should still be as strong and shouldn’t reduce. For me they are stronger some days more than others and that’s just what’s normal for me I think but it’s a worry every time she has a less active day or a day when I’m busy and then haven’t noticed much movement. I think if I lie down on my side and then feel her moving about I feel ok but I don’t always feel it immediately xx

R U prone to anxiety or (are hormones) is pregnancy making you like this?

R U prone to anxiety or (are hormones) is pregnancy making you like this?

I never really considered myself prone to anxiety until I got pregnant but, thinking about it, I think I must have been a little bit anxious before.

It’s definitely heightened in pregnancy though. Every few hours that baby doesn’t move, I’m worrying. I worry about hurting baby by little things that probably wouldn’t do anything. I don’t really like being in the car, especially as a passenger, as I get anxious (I’m getting a bit better now). I worry about food and stuff, although I avoid the foods that the nhs says to avoid...

@AliceRR hey! I know this is an old post but I resonated SO much with everything you have posted on this thread. I’m currently 37 weeks pregnant and feeling obsessed about movements and the weight of the responsibility to be able to identify if and when anything is wrong. I had a CTG last week after reporting reduced movement which was fine but then after the fact, I felt baby wasn’t moving as much as they usually should during the scan and that afternoon and that I should’ve pushed for more tests at the time/ something was missed. Baby moving away over the last week but I am now fixated on the thought that baby was unwell last week and I missed something. Baby doesn’t really have a clear set pattern either. Wondered how you are doing now a few years later and whether the anxiety persisted post birth? Take care and hope you see this! 😊 xx