To ask if people judget you for having a baby before buying a house?

[Marghe87]

I have noticed how obsessed people are with owning a property before trying for a baby and when I say that my husband and I want to start trying (we are in our 30s) everyone's first reply is "but you don't own a house yet".... so what?? Is it really such a big deal?

My parents had my sister and me whilst renting and only managed to buy a house later in life and we grew up fine - what's this obsession all bout?

I think people judge you more on toe size of your home than if it's owned/rented tbh.

We're expecting out third child and are in a tiny flat. We've already had lots of "Where are you going to put it?" and "was it planned?" comments
People will always find something to judge you on.

I think a lot of first time parents now days aren't home owners, properties aren't as affordable as before. People don't want to wait until it's too late like yourselves, whoever made that comment probably either quite well off themselves or at least in their forties.

Well, it's unlikely I will go back part time to be honest. I know we would never be able to buy whilst paying for nursery but hopefully once they start school childcare costs will be cheaper and we can start saving again.

I don't think I would go back pt - I am planning on continuing my career and yes, spending all our extras on childcare for the first 3-4 years but hopefully it will get better once they start school with wrap around care only.

I agree with pp who said you get judged on the size of your home regardless. I live in a 2 bed flat on the main road. I'm judged more for that, and often people assume it's rented when it isn't. In reality no one knows if you own or rent unless you tell them.

Nope. I'm 29 weeks pregnant and DP and I rent. Nobody has batted an eyelid.

For us ttc was the no.1 priority as that's the only thing that has a biological deadline, whereas you can get married and buy a house at any age

I had three DC with my exH and we never owned a home together. I then met DP a year after we separated and three years down the line we have an eight week old and bought our house four months ago so yes, when I was in the third trimester.

Life doesn’t always follow conventions and honestly, many people never own a house.

I live in London and am lucky enough to own but we have a 2 bed flat, not a house. People keep asking if we'll have a second and what we'll do. I'm like none of your business and kids can share a room! There's never a right time to TTC, it sounds like you have thought things through so go for it! I don't understand people who think you have to own a 3 bed house before you can have kids! We originally looked at 3 bed houses but couldn't afford one in the areas we liked so we decided we would rather be bursting at the seams in a flat and happy. Life is all about compromises, good luck with TTC!!