Pregnancy reveal etiquette- auntie had MC

[SenoraSurf]

Hi all,

We are planning to reveal our pregnancy to immediate family on Christmas Day when we will be 9 weeks.

My auntie recently suffered a MC in November at 6 weeks.

I know my family will tell my grandparents during there Christmas Day phonecall (which DH and I are fine with and have discussed). However, I'm a little worried about my auntie receiving the news, as I don't want to ruin her Christmas or bring any sadness.

How is it best to deal with this?
Should we hold off on telling my paternal grandparents to delay my auntie finding out until after Christmas Day? I don't want to message her personally before or on Christmas Day, but would hate for her to feel sad by finding out from my grandparents (her parents) on Christmas/Boxing Day.

Any advice welcomed. I know they have been trying for almost a year and were very sad when they lost their pregnancy. I don't want our happy news to ruin their Christmas.

She needs to hear it from you (not second hand) and when she is somewhere private. A text/email/note is kind, as she doesn't have to look happy for you immediately. How that works with your Christmas plans is up to you.

What SheepyFun said but why not wait until you are past 12 weeks to tell everyone?

It's nice that you are being sensitive. I hope all goes well and that your aunt is soon pregnant again.

@SheepyFun thank you. We are not spending Christmas with them nor seeing them over the festive period. So might just have to tell my grandparents not to tell them under any circumstance.

@jessstan2 thank you. I don't think there is a need to wait till 12 weeks. We are telling family, not everybody. Personally, I think waiting till 12 weeks is a shame. The first trimester is a big thing whether you hide it or not. Regardless of whether a baby comes to be, a pregnancy has still happened and that should be celebrated if people wish to do so

I’d tell your parents but hold off them telling your grandparents for a couple of weeks. Christmas is a really hard time of year for this sort of thing.

Yes I would delay telling your grandparents. I suffered several miscarriages between DD1 and DD2 and having my stepsister announce her pregnancy at prechristmas dinner drinks was difficult.

Congrats OP.

You are right that this news will likely cause your aunt to be upset, whenever she hears it, and of course you don’t want to ruin her Xmas. So tell your parents, that will be lovely and I’m sure they will be thrilled... but I agree with PP - ask them to hold off telling the GPs til after the new year. And just before they tell GPs, send your auntie a text so that the news comes from you, at a time when she can process it before having to put on a brave face in front of wider family.

Good luck with your pregnancy.
I’ve had two miscarriages but am with you, I have never felt the need to keep pregnancies under wraps until 12 weeks - each to their own though.