Hyperemesis Support

[LucindaE]

I hope everyone suffering from the Horrors of Hyperemesis will find this thread useful as a source of support and information.
There's no TMI on here - can't be by definition - and nobody should feel ashamed of moaning as much as they feel the need to.
MOH's wonderful website is full of useful information on this illness:
sites.google.com/site/pregnancysicknesssos
Another invaluable website is:
www.pregnancysicknesssupport.org.uk
If you need help in obtaining medication, phone them on:
024 7638 2020
Lastly, the NICE guidelines on treatment are useful:
cks.nice.org.uk/nauseavomiting-in-pregnancy
I would like to thank everyone who has given such invaluable support and advice on this and on previous threads.
Remember when you are at your worst, 'This Too Shall Pass'. It really will.
So many women on this thread have thought they couldn't get through this, but they did.
On my image of a pink castle: that is an image I use because when I was little, my family had a Snakes and Ladders board with an image on the last square of a pink castle in the clouds. As Hyperemesis is so like a grotesque version of Snakes and Ladders - eat a meal, go up a ladder, first thing in the morning bile run, down a snake - I have used the image of that pink castle on the last square of that Snakes and Ladders board as a metaphor for the happy end of Hyperemesis.

For the first time in quite a while, I've had a lovely day with my son. He's been the delightful boy I remember today, cooperative and helpful. He was a little star at Ikea (tho the sudden needing a wee just as we sat down with our food was inconvenient... luckily there was another mum on the table behind me so I asked her to make sure it didn't get cleared away!). I asked two well meaning strangers for help when he wanted to sit in the trolly and when I wanted him out again. And he continued being helpful at home. It's been really lovely, and really good for me. I'm knackered now! But I don't need to go out til 12noon tomorrow, so I'll have a lie in and lazy morning, then home by 2.30 so can have a power nap before picking son up from nursery

reastie I do hope you feel well enough to go for your scan on Friday, I always find it a real boost in finally starting to feel small movements, flutters, that I'm confident are baby not wind!

ReastieSorry about cold and cough, that's horrible. I have it, and it's bad enough without Hyperemesis. There were four of us hacking and spluttering in the chemist's today. I do hope you can make the scan. It will almost certainly cheer you up.
norbert and nightimenope So sorry, I mixed up the last part of the last message about the anxious mother and pre-eclampsia. Anya That is an absurd thing; I never heard of anyone being too thin to give birth naturally unless they were seriously anorexic. Sorry to hear of dramatic evacuation with cramps, oh dear.
norbert I hope the chocolate Nesquik stays put.
eallison I am so glad that you had a nice day. I did laugh at your little boy's delighted comments - [grin
Waves to SeaEagleFeather and everyone.

Dear. Chums, further to my last message moaning about my mum... 3 hyperemesis pregnancies in, I see my mum at least weekly and she is in no way old or not with it ...I just got a text from her saying ‘there must be something that will help?? Ginger??’
🤯🤯🤯
What kind of losing battle is this

@Nighttimenope 😬

My dad offered to make me a blackberry crumble. No idea why but he's trying his best 😂

@Norbert 😁❤️

@eal i know its minging, but if you know its all sitting 'just there' id get a rubber glove on and get hoking. Fucking grim but i had to do it first pg, felt like a bowling ball had been shoved in my arse. Desperate times...
Oh was a superstar when he got back last night. He had no choice. Handed dd over and went to bed at 8pm. Still rough today. Think the tiredness made me worse. Dd was unsettled through the night so awake with her. Then ds crawled into bed after 6 so awake from then. Little turd better stay in his bed tonight.
Im roughly 10 and half weeks and really hoping the worst will be over soon.

Reastie - interesting around the different variations of dosages for each person, makes sense though. I’m glad someone mentioned the farting, I was mortified the first time I smelt it - brutal and nobody ever talks about it in real life! I hope your cold clears up

Lucinda - haha I know! It’s based on her knowledge of other people being ‘unable’ to give birth and are a similar frame to me. It has nothing to do with the unfortunate health reasons as to why it’s been a c section! (I’ve tried to explain this to her) When it doesn’t annoy me, it does make me giggle a little bit inside that she really believes it!!

hairgician ive not had to resort to that. A lot of massage and applying pressure and success! Will keep on top of lactulose, 2 doses q day. It was actually very easy when finally managed, then this morning completely normal (if massive!).

@eal lucky you! Constipation has finally got the better of me today☹😖
Spent a good 20 min on the toilet, used ds stool to put feet on which helped, then tried massaging round it. Felt too hard but managed to get some of it out. Round 2 later. I have lactulose but even the thought of it makes me want to heave. Also used the 'j breath' technique they teach you at antenatal class. Helped a little. Gloves may be donned later. Fun times.

Sorry to see a fair few of you are having trouble with BM. I have been more constipated than I'd usually be but touch wood it's not been too bad that I've needed anything to help me along yet. I'm still off work and due back 11th Feb. I would've had 9 weeks off. My manager hasn't mentioned anything about my sick pay (which I'm not worried about tbh, because at the end of the day I'm too ill to work so it can't be helped) but I am just wondering if I should expect to receive less money in my next pay packet. Previous to pregnancy related illness, I have had a fair amount of time off from work from endometriosis and having surgery for that.

Canon my work do something like 4 weeks full pay 4 weeks half pay then statutory sick pay afterwards but how long you’ll get paid before SSP will depend on where you work. FWIW ssp is something like £90 a week but I don’t yet know if I’ll get the full £90 or if I get a proportion of it because I work part time. I’m nervous about this because if it’s proportionate I’ll only get about £30 a week!

Definitely getting a bug, I’m getting very wheezy (which is unlike me) and I’m quite wobbly.

Hair I hope you get relief soon, it really is horrible.

hairgician I think some of my success was from an even higher stool for my legs. Might be worth seeing if you can find something? Those j breaths are great.

Thanks @Reastie I believe mine is 4 months full pay followed by 4 months half pay. I'm not sure how close I am to that threshold. I know pregnancy related illness can't be added to usual absence in terms of disciplinary but can contribute to how soon your employer can make you go on leave. There's not a lot I've been able to do about any of my absence from work so I'll just have to wait and see what my pay is like next month but hopefully once I'm back to work I won't need further time off.

Canon they can only make you start mat leave if you’re off sick from 36 weeks pg.

Oh i thought it was bit earlier than that! @Reastie I'm not sure when I'll go on mat leave. I'm not sure how close I should go to the date as I guess it can be hard to know how you'll feel. I work in a very hot stuffy office and due mid August!

Canon it’s worth knowing though if you only get statutory maternity pay the level of maternity pay you get is based on your income during a set period in pg (I forget which weeks but it’s around week 20 and I think it’s an 8 week period they use) so if you’re off in that time and are paid less than normal because of being ill (eg me on ssp) it can greatly effect your maternity pay. It feels so unfair because I’m off due to a pg related issue, already having to suffer huge drop in income and then will have minimal maternity pay because of having to have time off because of pg issues making my normal way appear a lot less than it actually is. Hope that makes sense. Obv if you have enhanced from state maternity pay via work it may not effect it at all.

Thank you @Reastie you've been really helpful. I've tried to look online but I just really struggle with figures etc and find it difficult to get my head around it all. I will get maternity pay from my employer but that stops after 26 weeks. It's 8w full pay, 18w half plus stat, 13wk stat and then 13wk of nothing. That's literally all I know in terms of maternity leave! When I'm back on my feet and more settled being back at work I'll ask my manager what's what in terms of my sick pay.

@Reastie it's so unfair that there is a time limit on sick pay for something like HG. As if we'd want to be suffering from this. X

It always feels particularly cruel to time limit sick pay for this when by its very nature it's time limited... We can't really drag it out longer than birth, and even ifbyou daughter past birth, you're on mat leave anyway!

Reastie and canonlyhope I didn't know sick pay was so truncated. My knowledge from my days as a union rep is wholly outdated. So, in a way, women who suffer from pregnancy related illness often do suffer an oblique form of discrimination still, in that the finances are so impacted, even in secure employment, though the absence can't supposedly be used against them.
Anya and norbert and nighttimenope and others. Ha Ha and oh dear, about these helpful suggestions.
Hairigician and eallison Reastie and others - I don't know if the idea repels, but I do know that some people on here have bought bowel washing out applicances via the internet, which did work. But there is always the worry of the instructions probably advising against use in pregnancy, though I have seen that said of the cervical cap...Why would anyone think of using that?
Waves to everyone...

See Lucinda there is so much about pg that the law protects women rewlly well and we are lucky we have so much protection and fairness yet there’s a complete loophole where your maternity leave pay can be reduced to a pittance if you’re off and on sick pay due to pg related issues in the 8 weeks they work out your income during pg. My main manager has told me not to worry and my maternity pay will be based on my usual non sick pay income but given it’s a government statutory thing I think it’s above his head.

I’m started to think about returning to work possibly in the next month if I continue to successfully build up my trips out (assuming this virus doesn’t put me back for too long) (don’t want to tempt fate too much yet though as onoy managed trips out of an hour successfully so far with resting for the rest of the day and the next day) but it’s difficult as I onoy get paid for the hours I return to work if I do a gradual return. Last time I never managed more than a couple of months of reduced hours before I admitted defeat that it was just making me so sick I couldn’t do it and I actually got paid the same/less for my reduced hours as I would have got being off with statutory sick pay so I was no better financially by working but was a lot sicker. It’ll be a similar money situ again so I’ve got to work out the best thing to do. I’m struggling with it as work haven’t replaced me whiost off so when I do return I’ll have a lot heavier workload even on reduced lessons than I ever would usually have which will be very stressful. I also could only work certain hours as I still can only really cope with mornings. Maybe I shouldn’t be worrying about it until I can function better and get out more. 4/5 very short gentle trips out of the house in the past 3 weeks doesn’t mean I’m ready for work mode... I just feel like I’m being pathetic but at the same time I know if I went back tomorrow I just couldn’t do it.

It's stressful enough without worrying about money@Reastie I hope it works out.

I've just been for a scan and everything is good, dates match up and I saw a strong heartbeat and got a little wave, amazing for 9 weeks. Massively relieved and reassuring.

lovely to hear norbert. makes it all real doenst it!

Thanks @SeaEagleFeather it makes it all real and bearable - I feel constant guilt about hating the sickness but also the worry of a mc again so it's a massive relief.

goodness, about hating the sickness - I can't think of anyone who wouldn't! Don't feel guilty!