Friend's birthday party at 36 weeks

[LittleKitty1985]

A good friend's 30th birthday party is in February, when I'll be 36 weeks pregnant. It's in Bristol, we live in London, so a couple of hours train journey away. The weekend will involve various activities TBD which I could take part in or not. & DH would be there to keep me company if I'm not doing what the group is.

My pregnancy has been very easy so far, but obviously I don't know how I'll feel by February. & if I leave it until nearer the time to decide then the trains and hotels will be too expensive.

So... should I go? Or is this unrealistic?

So hard to know in advance! Personally I would be very nervous of going, not so much because of how I feel but because I didn’t like being so far from my hospital. That is maybe a bit ridiculous from a rational point of view because there are hospitals in Bristol but I didn’t feel comfortable, and it’s a very intense time anyway so rational thought isn’t always there! It’s not just baby coming early, it’s if there’s a concern you want triaged.

The two hours on the train I would have found uncomfortable but doable.

Will you still be working? If so, losing a weekend’s worth of rest will be hard.

I would say it is doable if you’re willing to make a big effort and the pregnancy is fairly straightforward. If you do go, speak to your midwife about what the process would be if eg you had reduced movements while in bristol.

Any way you could book a hotel with free cancellation?

I went away for the weekend at 35 weeks earlier this year. 2 hours from home but we drove. I had a fairly easy pregnancy and felt pretty good. I would say take maternity notes and hospital bag. Can you drive instead of train? Also try and book a hotel that will allow cancellation up to a few days before you go.

I'd go at 36 weeks. We've been invited to a wedding 6 hours drive away at 39 weeks which we've had to decline, but 2 hours at 36 weeks I would go.

I don't know. I had a straight forward pregnancy but dc1 was born 36 weeks to the day.

To be honest it’s impossible to say. It depends on your perception of risk I guess! I went to a wedding in London at 38.5 weeks pregnant (lived in the south west) and stayed overnight. It was fine, I had a great time.
However some people obviously go into labour early etc. I was happy to take my notes with me and take the risk of giving birth elsewhere, but not everyone would be!

I felt fine at 36 weeks but would agree with PP who suggested a car journey if possible and a hotel that can be cancelled at the last minute. Take your notes and take it very easy!

Yes. Obviously you could give birth at 36 weeks or you could labour so quickly you won’t make it back to your own hospital- but it’s much more likely you won’t.

Go but take your notes with you just in case. Your social life is curtailed when baby comes along, no need to do it even earlier than necessary!

Will you still be working? If so, losing a weekend’s worth of rest will be hard.

That's a good point. I'm not planning to leave work until the 15th.

Driving isn't an option unfortunately.

I think I'm leaning towards not going...

Unless you can leave it closer to the time I’d say probably not now.
You might feel fine or you could feel worn out have bad back by then and train journey too wouldn’t help.

I had terrible restless leg syndrome in my last trimester. I don't think it would do you any harm but it might be exhausting and uncomfortable.

Oh and I’m currently 38 weeks with my third and would be fine to go now too.

I’m 37 weeks. I’ve been finding long journeys uncomfortable for a few weeks, I need the car seat practically horizontal for it to be bearable and wouldn’t attempt a long train ride. The actual party would be no problem, I’m still going on nights out locally and am in no rush to go home!

I wouldn't personally. I went to a friend's 30th at 36 weeks and really regretted it. It was just a meal but in a different city and I was exhausted after. I was still working at that stage but found being out socialising in the evening draining.

I had DD at 34 weeks 🙈 so in future pregnancies will be very cautious booking anything much past 30 weeks, but that was our experience! I was booked to be at my now SIL hen do at 36 weeks 😂 if it isn’t a lot of money then I’d say go for it and see how you feel. If it’s crazy expensive and you can’t wait and see, personally I would decline.