Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

Flip

Original poster

Christmas! To tell or not?

19 replies

christmascrazyalways · 06/12/2018 08:24

Hi everyone

I will be 10 weeks the Friday before Xmas and I’m wondering what everyone else is doing in terms of telling family over the Xmas period?

It is our first so I was tempted to keep quiet until 12 weeks but we got to see our little dot yesterday after a subchronic hematoma caused a small bleed and all looks well!

It will be tough hiding the no drinking but could be done on the day!

We are only spending the day with parents and younger siblings so the other half of me is tempted to tell!

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

Whoopsies · 06/12/2018 08:30

It's totally up to you and how you feel. I'll be 8 weeks when I see my family over Christmas and I will tell my mum and sister, but I would tell them if things didn't work out anyway. I won't be saying anything to my ds or me nieces and nephews though.

MadameJosephine · 06/12/2018 08:33

I wouldn’t tell all and sundry that early on but close family, why not? I told my parents and sibling when I was 6+1 and had seen a heartbeat on early scan. I’d had 2 previous losses and had needed their support then so whichever way it turned out they needed to know

Congratulations

ILOVEautumnleaves · 06/12/2018 08:35

Congratulations! How lovely to have had a Sneak Peek.

Telling or not telling for me depends on who I’d want to tell if I miscarried. Best friend yes (from peeing on the stick), SIL (she’s a twat) no, Mum no (would fuss too much and drive me mad).

I think if you’d tell your family if you had a mc (even if you hadn’t ptold them you were pregnant), then Christmas would be a lovely time to tell them.

Jackshouse · 06/12/2018 08:59

I have booked a private early scan for the week before Christmas as I have a history of miscarriage. After a heartbeat has been seen the risk of miscarriage reduces.

I’m not sure if I will say anything or not but as a rule of thumb I would tell people who would tell if you do have a miscarriage.

MustStopSnacking28 · 06/12/2018 09:38

I told my mum very early, around 6 weeks, so I think if you want to tell close family then why not do it at Christmas ☺️ I actually think the 12 week thing is really lonely and you need some support as it can be hard feeling rough! Hopefully you won’t feel too bad and won’t need the support in which case it’s just a nice thing to share. Congrats!

Bettyhop · 06/12/2018 10:18

A firm yes here. Something made me tell a very close family member on his birthday when I was only 8 weeks pregnant. He died suddenly and unexpectedly 5 days later and I am so glad that we got to tell him and have that conversation. Like you I had seen the heartbeat on scan due to history of miscarriage and that significantly reduces the chance of miscarriage in its self even before 12 weeks. Everyone's circumstances are different but for us it was the best thing we did. Congratulations. Xxx

carly2803 · 06/12/2018 10:29

yes.

we told our families (both sides) and i told a few close friends before i even hit 12 weeks - but if i had to tell them bad news then those are the same people i could have,,,,
so as long as you work by that principle ^^ tell them.

fwiw we ended up having an emergancy scan for a bleed...so thought you know what - tell them. (everything was fine..my body was just being daft!)
they were delighted :)

MakeAWhish · 06/12/2018 10:33

I would, but I can't hold my own water. I'm 6w4d and we've told both sets of parents, siblings, and a few close friends. It's my third pregnancy and I did the same with the other two. It's a very personal thing. Do what feels right to you! And congrats! Xx

SenoraSurf · 06/12/2018 18:29

I will be 8 weeks at Christmas and we are planning to tell our families then. We don't want an early scan so won't have seen heartbeat or anything but still going to share our news then. Good luck whatever you do!

mortifiedmama · 06/12/2018 18:50

Personally I wouldn't, but I also wouldn't tell them if I had a miscarriage.

I only tell people pre scan if I'd tell them if I lost the baby.

GabbyGal · 06/12/2018 20:25

I’m in the same boat only wondering whether to tell friends next weekend. I’m having a Christmas night out with my best friends and want to tell them because they will 100% suspect anyway when I’m not drinking and I’d rather announce it myself than have people speculating. I’ll be 10+3 then. I booked a scan for Tuesday so we’ll at least know if everything is looking ok at that stage before we tell anyone. We’re planning to tell our parents after the scan, and then I might tell my best friends on the Saturday, I still haven’t decided. We won’t be telling anyone else until the new year. I’ll be 12 weeks over Christmas so won’t have my “12 week scan” until I’m 13+2.

Lymphy · 06/12/2018 20:46

This was me last year, I really wanted to tell my parents, we had the dating scan booked on the 28th Dec so we got a private one the week before just to check all ok and get a pic really, we put it in a cracker, a bit cheesy yes , but it was lovely for my DS to pull the cracker with my mum after dinner

Triskaidekaphilia · 06/12/2018 21:00

I've got an early scan just before Christmas so if all is well we will be telling family on Christmas day, I'll be 9 weeks.

PBobs · 07/12/2018 04:09

We're Skyping my parents this weekend. I wanted to do something more creative but I also want to tell friends in the country I live in and friends we're visiting over Christmas and I don't feel happy doing that until my parents know. I'll be 13+6.

jq28 · 07/12/2018 06:27

We have booked a private scan on the 22nd Dec and will tell family at Christmas. Will be 10 weeks then.

Original poster

christmascrazyalways · 07/12/2018 13:07

Thanks everyone!

I was so expecting the scan to be bad news, the sonographer was so subdued and she told me 'I'm just having a good look and then I'll explain all' - so after this i'm sooo excited!

I think maybe something cheesy would go down well with our families, I am deffo feeling the sickness today so googling christmas annoucments is taking my mind off it....

have a fab weekend x

OP posts:

chardonm · 07/12/2018 15:23

If you lost the baby would your family be supportive and nice; or would they ask you every month after that if you're pregnant and are you trying again etc?

That would inform my decision more than whether or not it would be hard to hide.

KinCat · 07/12/2018 16:04

We're telling families around Christmas when I'll be 10 weeks. I've got my first scan at 8+4 and then we've booked another one for 9+5. If everything is ok at both scans I'd feel comfortable telling immediate family and close friends.

Bunnybaubles · 09/12/2018 21:30

I suppose I'll tell my parents before Xmas day. I didn't want to as my mum kept offering reasons (her reasons) why I shouldn't have another baby.

I'm roughly 8 weeks just now, known for a month but not told the doctors yet either.
I actually feel guilty having known for so long and not told mum.

My SIL is also pregnant and will be at my mum's, I won't be letting anyone else know till after she has her baby. I'm really excited for me tho 😁
I think it all comes down to individual circumstances and what your relationship with your family is like. I announced my last pregnancy to all my family on Xmas day as we sat down to dinner which was really nice. Just seems circumstances have changed this time and has made it more awkward x

Flip

Swipe left for the next trending thread