Teacher . . Mat leave . . 33 weeks . . Advice

[Ceryss]

Hi, I’m currently 33 weeks and have 2 full working weeks left at school. Totally stressed with an impossible workload dropped on me at the last minute including writing a very detailed report for a project group on Friday - only told about it at the end of last week despite head knowing about it for 5 weeks (everyone is stressed not just me). To top it all off, had to stay late yesterday for a school disco (8.30pm), head caught me and asked me to complete a task and get it to him by Friday morning! This is on top of all assessment, pupil progress notes, lesson observations and handing over class to NQT. I was honest and said I’m at breaking point but he still expects it to be done. I’m really worried that this amount of stress is affecting baby - what do I do?

Go to your gp and get signed off for the last two weeks?
Or write down everything you have to do, present it to your head and explain that you wont be able to do it all so what should you prioritise?

Others might disagree but I think you should go to the doctor and get signed off with stress. I'm a teacher and the stress is actually making me physically ill. I'm a middle manager and my senior line manager has been off long term so I am covering her workload, plus I am also covering the workload of another teacher who is also off long term. Many teachers are bring asked to work in a way that is mentally qns physically damaging as it's just not possible I had been ttc but stopped until I can get things sorted with work. Get signed off and focus on you and your baby. It won't reflect badly on you but it will highlight the problems that are happening within your school, which I don't think would be a bad thing.

Ask them what you won't be doing because of this extra work. I second the writing a list.

Get signed off if you are feeling unwell.

Ceryss, just echoing previous advice. It just isn't worth sticking around, getting anxious about. School will chew you up and spit you back out again without a word of thanks. If you get signed off, nobody will remember anyway, and you are less likely to feel resentful when the whole thing starts up again when you return to work. Go and enjoy the last trimester in peace, and congratulations!
Anatol, just had to say that I was you, actually putting off trying for a family of my own for years, as there was always 'the next tricky phase' at school, and I felt I was indispensable (in a bad way), and that it had to be me to steer things up and man the decks. Luckily, we took part in a 'heads exchange' where local heads got to shadow each other for a few days to get 'fresh eyes' blah blah blah. The head who visited us overheard me in the staff room, explaining to a nosy colleague that yes, I would be trying for a family but I couldn't yet, because school x, y and z. Later in the corridor, he asked to speak to me, and said how sad he felt on my behalf, and that if I were his member of staff, he would have made it easier for me to plan for a family, not made it feel impossible. I felt like an angel had spoken to me, honestly, it was like I could see how closed my thinking had become in an instant. I think I started TTC pretty much straight away. And the sky didn't fall in. I even wrote a card to thank him while on maternity leave. Don't let the artificial and manufactured urgency of school hold you back from going for your dream of a family. I wish you the best of luck.

School will chew you up and spit you back out again without a word of thanks. If you get signed off, nobody will remember anyway, and you are less likely to feel resentful when the whole thing starts up again when you return to work. Go and enjoy the last trimester in peace, and congratulations!

Agree. Go to the GP today.

Hi @Ceryss I'm 34 weeks today & a teacher who is finishing up in 2 weeks time too! Thank god!

That sounds unsustainable tbh! Your SMT shouldn't be putting these extra demands on you right now but understand it's sometimes not as easy as to speak up & refuse to do things when asked! I'm very fortunate to be in a supportive school whereby I'm leaving more earlier than normal at the back of 3 & tying up loose ends in class when the kids are busy working.

Try & jst work smart to get the essentials done when you are in school don't try & do the impossible as you really won't get any more thanks for it! Christmas mindfulness colouring sheets? Make a Christmas word search for a friend? Or even research Christmas in another country & make a ppt about it? All time fillers that the kids will enjoy & could buy you some time!

Good luck & roll on Friday 21st!!

Just another echoing that you should go to your gp and get signed off with stress. It may be affecting baby, it did for me.

I work in social work and seemed to have ever increasing amounts of work to get everything done before I left on mat leave. I suggested bringing my leave forward but was dissuaded by my boss because of course I'd want to spend as much time as possible with baby. All was fine until 32 weeks when baby wasn't growing properly. This was put down to stress and my high blood pressure. It was only picked up because I had a placenta issue and needed an extra scan. I immediately left work and DD started growing properly again. I'm not trying to scare you, it's just people will always tell you that they were pregnant in 10ft of snow, walking 100miles a day whilst battling lions (my MIL was like this) and it made me feel that I should be able to cope when I clearly couldn't.

Go to the Dr and get signed off.

I say this as somebody who is usually of the “put on a brave face and get on with it” mentality, whether pregnant or not. With DC1 I was hugely dressed with work. She was born with IUGR as the placenta failed and I was later advised by a consultant that stress is the biggest threat to placenta function.

With DC2 I started to have similar issues with the placenta failing and her measuring small. I then went on mat leave at 34w and fortunately when I stopped running round so much she had a growth spurt and was born without any issues.

I’m not trying to scare you, but don’t feel you have to be a hero and save the world. It’s not worth it. You head sounds like an @*$! and isn’t deserving of your commitment and loyalty!

All the best to you. Put you and your baby first.

Go off sick there is no other way