Should I just tell work?

[Triskaidekaphilia]

I'm 6 weeks tomorrow and been battling mild nausea for a couple of weeks. I was hoping I could keep it a secret until we've told DPs and PILs at Christmas (I have an early scan booked just before), or until 12 week scan if possible. But today I've felt awful since breakfast, was sick at work and got sent home. My work follows the 48 hr rule so can't go back until at least wednesday afternoon. I'm thinking of telling the manager who normally deals with attendance as I believe that stops it being flagged off as an attendance issue, and means I don't automatically have to go home if sick.

But not sure what to do about my colleagues. If I go back in but am sick again they'll work it out and I might as well tell them. If I can manage not to be sick then I can keep the secret, but it may be difficult as I'm on my feet the whole shift, usually 5 hours between meals and difficult to snack full stop let alone do so inconspicuously. Very difficult to be sick without anyone finding out too (even if I hadn't admitted I threw up, someone heard me today!) Has anyone just ended up telling work when you really didn't want to?

Its only really my 3 closest colleagues that would need to know, and while I would feel sad to have to talk about a miscarriage with them, I probably would tell them anyway if it happened. It took us so long to concieve and my mind is constantly swinging between feeling like now I'm finally pregnant it's going to stick, and fear that it doesn't work like that and that we mustn't get our hopes up. I've had some spotting for the first time today and although I'm aware it could be nothing, it's reminded me that there's still a high chance of miscarriage. So I think thats why I'm all over the place at the moment. Sorry, that was a bit of a rant

I'd tell them, I was so ill with my first and had to eat such odd things all the time to keep it at bay that I preferred to tell people than have constant conversations about the uncharacteristic behaviour. And I understand you wouldn't want to tell all and sundry, but my approach to telling people 'early' is whether I'd be ok telling them if something goes wrong. If you would then no harm in telling them, unless you think there are career issues to consider.

In a similar situation, I told my immediate superior and the two people I either with most closely. I asked my boss also to tell HR. I asked for discretion, avd for them not to tell anyone else.

By telling work, they can do you a pregnancy risk assessment. More importantly, pregnancy related sick leave must be recorded seperately to other sick leave and can not be used in disciplinary action against you. But you need to tell them so that they can apply this!

I've told work and it's so much better not having to pretend. I have no energy at the moment & work have been very supportive

Certainly tell your boss. The moment you tell them you are protected by law. Nothing to be list by telling them, but lots to get gained (not having a bad sickness record and having time off for appointments being 2).

As for colleagues, I personally wouldn't, but up to you.

Thanks everyone. As mentioned I am aware that telling my manager will give me better protection against absence, it was more about telling my colleagues. But I don't really feel I have a choice if the sickness continues as it was today. So I'm going to speak to my manager tomorrow and explain the situation, ask if I can come back on Wednesday. I'm going to talk to the doctor tomorrow and see if they can reccomend anything, but I imagine it will be the advice I already know but can't really follow. And then when I go back, I'm going to tell my colleagues I'm still feeling rough, and if I do end up being sick again I'm just going to have to tell them, because they'll work it out anyway when the manager doesn't send me home!