Some doctors are dickheads

[overagain]

At antenatal clinic to see the consultant. Technically due to my thyroid but actually to get my c section signed off. I'm 24 weeks. First Dr I saw at 16 weeks could see from my presentation I was terrified, was really understanding and patient and said she could see no reason why I shouldn't have a c section based on my past birth trauma and injury but she was a registrar so couldn't actually sign it off and made me an appointment with the consultant for today. She wrote "birth trauma and injury, for c section" on my notes to make it clear.

Consultant today was called away due to an emergency and I ended up seeing a different registrar who was patronising as fuck, dismissed my birth injuries and my mental health and just told me they don't deal with maternal request c sections until 34 weeks.

The other registrar could see how not knowing my birth method was affecting my mental health and enjoyment of the pregnancy and she really put me at ease which has helped me enormously. Now this one has put be right back. Hating being pregnant, tears and probably anxiety and depression. Honestly. It's like she's knows nothing about birth trauma and mental health. She wouldn't even read the last set of notes. I feel so shit now and wish I'd had the abortion when I found out. I don't know how I'll cope for the next 10 weeks not knowing.

I have an appointment with a consultant, I'll be nearly 30 weeks. I haven't had any appointments prior to this about having a section (other than last midwife appointment where I explained what I wanted and she referred me).

I'm really sorry that this person has made you feel this way. Like you I had a very traumatic birth first time with lots of complications which is my reason for pushing for a section.

I'm yet to meet with them however surely it should be our right? I've heard mixed stories about success but you obviously think this is the best option for you and baby - I don't understand how someone can tell you you're 'wrong'.

I'm assuming you'll be going back to the consultant a bit later? X

I'll get another appointment at around 34 weeks to discuss but I'm worried about how I'm going to cope between now and then. I've had birth trauma counselling after my last birth which was helpful but it's different being pregnant and the thought of it all happening again is knocking me sick. I've been in tears since my appointment. I just don't want to be pregnant anymore.

I'm really sorry you've had this experience  they won't discuss electives generally before about 34 weeks, it's shit but that's just how it is. Does your trust have a consultant midwife? I had an appointment with ours which massively reduced my anxiety. They carry a lot of weight with the surgeons too. Try some mindfulness exercises to reduce your anxiety, just to get through the next few weeks. 

Also, request that next clinic you'll wait and see the consultant, or give their secretary a call and explain your experience and request that you speak the consultant directly at your next appointment.
Sadly you still get patronising fuckers in every area of work.
The registrar at my booking in appt told me I was basically going to die if I didn't agree to a tubal ligation at the same time as my section 

FeralBeryl I think some of my anger is because until I saw the first registrar I was all prepared for a fight, but the fact she said it should be signed off early and should be for medical reasons NOT maternal request made me more relaxed. this registrar didn't read through the previous notes or ask for my reasons and basically had a "why are you here" attitude. She also told me to book another scan as I have a low lying placenta - it had already been booked and written in my notes, she just wasn't paying attention and then wouldn't listen when I said it was booked.

I'll definitely ask to hold out for the consultant next time.

Oh so you were probably lulled into a false sense of security bless you 
Honestly - it will be FINE. Please try not to let this spoil the next part of your pregnancy. You have very valid concerns and are perfectly entitled to pursue an alternative delivery.
Think about the Cons MW for support if you need.
I was exhausted with it all and he was a great help. He essentially took over and told the consultant exactly what would happen. Then I got fecking pre eclampsia and needed one anyway  Try and forget about Dr Knob now and enjoy your weekend