Who can i talk to? Still birth.

[LBNM19]

This probably sounds really awful, but i can't take much more of these thoughts every morning I wake up thinking my baby is dead, urging him to move. I'm obsessed with his movements, always thinking they a reduced then he will start moving. I'm just terrified he is going to be still born. The last couple of weeks it's got worse and worse.

I'm 34 weeks and my last pregnancy ended at 28 weeks I had an emergency section due to infection and my son was born very unwell and this has made me feel worried through this whole pregnancy. I thought I would feel better at this stage but things have got worse.

I just feel so stressed and i don't no who to talk to, I don't even see a midwife untill 36 weeks now.

That sound horrid OP poor you. Can you ring the midwife and tell her how you're feeling? She should know of people she can refer you to for help and most places will fast track pregnant women.
All the best for the rest of the preg and

Does your antenatal clinic have a counsellor? You could ask to speak to them too 

There are mental health midwives, although you may struggle to be seen in time.
Does your work place offer councillors? We have a number we can ring.
Would a count the kicks wristband help? It helps you keep track.
Your anxiety is completely understandable, it’s a tough time, but you will get through it.
Some anxiety medications are safe in pregnancy- maybe gp would be a good start?

I don't have a specific midwife, I've been consultant led through this pregnancy. My c section was booked at my appointment last week for the 12th of nov and it was all very matter of fact, MRSA swabs, consent forms etc she didn't even measure my stomach, i didn't feel like i could talk to her.

I will call the antenatal reception and ask tomorrow if i can see someone then.

Thankyou for replying, writing it down actually made me realise how intrusive these thoughts have become.

I was under the mental health team during my 2nd pregnancy, i also carry a genetic condtion and my oldest son is severely disabled which made my 2nd pregnancy very hard. The GP weren't helpful last time and it did take a while to be reffered to the specialist mental health midwife and prenatal psychiatrist so I don't hold out much hope in speaking to them. Will check through my notes as I'm sure my previous mental health issues we're spoken about at booking but because of my son was born at 28 weeks this has been my focus this time round and I hadn't realised how anxious I've become.

You are doing really well to recognise it. I’m sure the midwives will talk to you, and hopefully help you find some strategies.
Maybe a mindfulness app to talk you through some calming strategies in mean time, although I appreciate you may not have time for it- it sounds like you have your hands full!!
Take time to look after yourself.