Terrified of labour

[Kimmyx]

Hello can anyone please give me some reassurance of a positive birth story?!! I’ve just come across a YouTube video of someone discussing their labour and it’s actually traumatised me. It was a woman discussing having an episiotomy without any pain relief because it had all worn off and she felt everything.

Any good tips or positive words of advise? I plan to do it naturally. I’m 31 weeks! Only 9 weeks to go (fuck...)

Step away from the Google!
My first was lovely. Got to hospital two and a half hours before my water birth. Bit of gas and air and there he was.
Second one was fast!!! Still fine.
People tend to share the horrid stories and not the straightforward and simple ones.
Good luck.

Hi op!
I had my first when I was 21 - she's now 7 - I would 100% have another.

I had a very quick labour - 11 minutes of actual pushing and she was out - I had back labour so had major back ache. I didn't have any pain relief and only grazed inside - no stitches.

I was dreading it & one born ever minute made it worse lol - people are quick to tell you their horror stories ... my only advise is to try and keep moving if possible during labour and listen to the midwives - they're amazing :-)
Xx

2 lovely labours here, both were water births, just gas and air. Honestly, it really wasn't that bad, I'm in no way traumatized by either birth, in fact I remember them as a really happy magical time. I didn't tear and didn't need any intervention, so no episiotomies, and Ds is a massive 9lb8.

I would highly recommend hypnobirthing, it's all about positive thinking and helped me so much.

You need the Positive Birth movement. And Tell Me a Good Birth Story. Look it up on Facebook. Honestly, we need more stories of “it’s fine”. My labour wasn’t horrific, it wasn’t euphoric, it was just fine.
Please speak to your midwife and ask them for some resources as well but stay the hell away from YouTube.

... and to some extent programmes like One Born Every Minute. Some MNs

Not going to share my story but something that I think may help (I hope). Do a birth plan of course but don't set your heart on a certain type of labour/birth. Be as open minded as you can. Birth plans are great for feeling more in control but labour is unpredictable and I think it can cause a lot of distress to some women when things don't don't go the way they had planned. If you're open minded and trust that no matter what happens, baby will be here and fine at the end of it, hopefully that will help make for a calmer and less panicked experience. You will be absolutely fine!

Also, not tried it myself but have heard very positive things about hypnobirthing techniques for staying calm during labour.

Agh posted too soon.
Some mns love OBEM but I think it paints a bit of an unrealistic view of childbirth.

Definitely look into hypnobirthing if you’re feeling anxious. It teaches you a lot about avoiding fear and how to cope with whatever may come and also has a huge emphasis on positivity and avoiding anything negative! I feel really anxious too(I’m overdue and awaiting induction) but positive affirmations are really helpful

I love Labour they aren't that scary at all. Yes it's painful but I've had two babies on gas and air and didn't suffer no tearing or grazing.
as soon as that baby is out the pain stops i was up in the shower both times 15 minutes after delivery putting new pjs on. I'm not saying everyone's isn't bad because some people do find it painful but it just wasn't for me and it might not be for you either. What I would say is step away from the birth videos and learn some breathing techniques etc x

I did hypnobirthing and it definitely helped with anxiety.

However, make your birth plan. Figure out what you prefer but go in with an open mind

I had a list of birth preferences ready for when i gave birth last week. 90% of them couldn't/didn't happen. Id still call my birth a positive experience.

Oh and fwiw, I had an episiotomy. It was fine. Still healing a week later but its totally manageable.

Two induced labours here. Both calm, relatively easy, joyful births. Best bits of advice I can give are make sure you cannot possibly be constipated beforehand, have no expectations, ask for diamorphine just before you think you can't do any more and down below is really not the worst place to be stitched. The only reason I'm sad about not having another one is not getting to do labour again. I would happily do it if it didn't result in a newborn to look after. Look towards the first six weeks. Worse than labour every time (but that's just me).

Some women seem to sneeze and their babies come out, some have awful labours.

Please don't panic over something that you have no control over

I had gas and air only too and she was back to back. It hurt yes but manageable and not a horror story at all. Hope all goes well for you

Also very quick for a first birth- started at half seven and delivered at half twelve and only in hospital from 9.30 and pushed for what felt like minutes

I had three days of contractions, followed by pethadine and an epidural, and then delivered my baby at 4am, having been in the hospital from 7.30 the previous morning. It was the most exhausting, exhilarating emotional experience of my life. The people who cared for us were fantastic, and the epidural was brilliant. I'd do it again in a second, even with the three days of contractions.

I've had more painful periods to be honest. Just had two paracetamol and no gas and air. Really wasn't bad at all and it only took 2 hours.

I was induced which I didn’t really want but baby got here safely thanks to the wonderful doctors and mws who delivered her. Her birth was a bit scary (heart rate kept dropping etc) but it was still very calm. For me, the most amazing feeling is when they hand over your baby for the first time. Makes me tear up thinking about it (dd is 4 months so very fresh for me).

Definitely look in to hypnobirthing. It all made so much sense and I had a great labour. Things can go differently than expected but just trust your body to do it's thing. I was in the pool for most of it, took some gas and air and it was actually lovely. I stayed at home as long as i could on the birthing ball watching disney films and I was 7cm by the time I went to maternity ward. You can do it!

I had my baby at 11.30 last night and it was a very good experience. Laboured at home til 8cm, into the pool at the hospital and baby born half an hour after that. It was painful but I was in control of my thoughts which made all the difference. With dd1 my mind raced away and I thought I might die. This time I changed how I thought about what my body was doing and it all fell into place. Still fucking sore, but in no way traumatic. I would happily have had an epidural if I'd not been coping as well, there's no right way.

I was worried about having an episitomy when I was pregnant, but in reality (from my experience) it's okay. After over an hour of active pushing the midwife suggested doing one, which she did and one or two pushes later my daughter was out :) I really don't remember any pain associated with it at all. Definitely a good move.

Epidural. Best. Thing. Ever.