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Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

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Original poster

What are your thoughts on Dummies?

64 replies

Rooroo1012 · 24/09/2018 13:25

I'm 35 weeks pregnant with DS2 and I'm wondering whether to bother with a dummy.
DS1 never really liked using a dummy so by the time he was 2.5months old, he stopped using one. Even getting him to use one was difficult as he would constantly spit it out.

Do babies really need them?
Anyone out there that is planning on NOT using one?

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dreamyflower · 24/09/2018 20:49

Couldn't have done without them. My DS was sucking his thumb in hospital and so we thought a dummy would be better as we could take it away when he's older. He took to it straight away. He's 16 months and still has it now. It's been soothing during teething. He doesn't have it during the day anymore- only at naps and bed. He only liked the tommee tippee orthopaedic ones. £5 for two but so worth it.

dinosaurkisses · 24/09/2018 20:58

Wasn’t intending on using one but MIL bought us a packet anyway, with me thinking “Pft, what a waste.”. They were ripped open in desperation when dd was a week old and just couldn’t settle one night.

Original poster

Rooroo1012 · 25/09/2018 10:38

Thanks, everyone.
I will have one on standby and go along with the baby to see what he wants.
I didn't bf with my first due to complications but am planning to try again the second time around. Interesting to read different views on bf and the use of dummies. So is it safe to do both or should I try an establish bf before introducing a dummy?

OP posts:

Nat6999 · 25/09/2018 10:50

If you use bottles, get the dummies that match the tests you use. Don't feel guilty about using them, my son had a dummy from birth up to being nearly 4, other than when he went to pre school he had it whenever he wanted, he had no speech problems, started talking at 11 months & by about 13 months was using short sentences. He used to have his dummy in the car to & from preschool but as I was parking up to drop him off he used to give me his dummy & as soon as he got back in the car afterwards asked me for his dummy, he was at pre school from 2.5, we never had any problem getting him to give his dummy up, he decided when he didn't need it any more.

Chocolatecoffeeaddict · 25/09/2018 10:56

Baby decides whether they want a dummy or not. My eldest loved his and had one for sleeps till he turned 4 and a half. My other three children I tried with a dummy but they refused. I did want them to have one because I've found they settle more easily and sleep better but I suppose they then find other ways to self settle. My girls are thumb suckers and and my youngest loves the blanket slightly over his face.

sabrinathethirtysomethingwitch · 25/09/2018 10:59

I was adamant DS wouldn't have a dummy. Caved at 3 weeks . He is such a sucky baby and was using me as a dummy.

The advice re: not using a dummy when breastfeeding for 6 weeks is because sucking releases a hormone that tells baby he/she is full. Therefore can interfere with cluster feeding to build up mums milk supply. I did give DS a dummy but I was careful to watch out for hunger cues.

BlaaBlaaBlaa · 25/09/2018 11:00

Lifesaver!!

sabrinathethirtysomethingwitch · 25/09/2018 11:00

ps I had a dummy until I was 4

dinosaurkisses · 25/09/2018 12:32

One more thing I’d say in their defence is that it’s a massive comfort during teething as well.

When dd gets a bit manky when she’s cutting a new tooth, 9 times out of 10 giving her her dummy for ten mins will sort it. It’s v rare that I’d need to break out the big guns ie Calpol

beefchowmein · 25/09/2018 12:34

Mine didn’t have them (were more interested in using bf for comfort) but I really don’t see the problem with them at all for babies? There is only downsides once babies/toddlers are a bit older and have teeth and talk. There is even some evidence that they may help prevent SIDs

NewNameDueToMyIdiocy · 25/09/2018 13:50

I was "anti-dummy" when I was pregnant (naive first time mum alert) and then when DC1 was born and was a comfort sucker I desperately tried to offer a dummy, but it just got spat out in favour of my nipples.

After six months of DC1 only napping on me I tried again with the dummy and it was well received and I got respite from constantly having to hold a sleeping baby. Independent naps during the day - hurrah!

Of course DC1 is now two and still has a dummy, which isn't ideal - but strictly only for naps and bedtime - never during the day. I figure we will wean off of it soonish, but waiting until the concept can be understood.

I had a dummy for a LONG time as a child (I can actually remember it, I think I was at primary school ) and it didn't do me any harm so I'm not beating myself up too much about it. We do what we need to do at the time!

So basically a long-winded way of saying "be open minded". I am pregnant again and will see how it goes, I won't offer this one a dummy unless there is a need to.

LordOfTheFleas · 25/09/2018 14:18

I'm not really keen and didn't use them but don't judge those who do, each to their own. Every baby and parent is different, do what suits you.

Jackiebrambles · 25/09/2018 14:26

I was never planning to give one - was a bit judgy if i'm honest. I had one given to me in a pack of other newborn essentials and my son refused it when he was around 10-12 weeks old. Then during the 4 month sleep regression and me and DH were beside ourselves with tiredness he said 'have we still got that dummy?' we found it and he fell asleep INSTANTLY.

My god it was a game changer.

He then had it for sleeps only until just after he turned 3. We did exactly the same with his sister and she's just given hers up (also at just turned 3).

With my DD I made sure breastfeeding was well established, so I didn't give the dummy until she was around 7 weeks ish.

SpikyCactus · 25/09/2018 14:28

DNephew has a dummy and he is virtually mute because he couldn’t learn to talk with a plastic plug in his mouth 24/7. Unsurprisingly I chose not to give a dummy to my DC.

slippermaiden · 25/09/2018 14:33

I work in a special care baby unit, they are invaluable. They help babies cope with pain as they find sucking soothing. People don't like them because they are misused, every day you will see toddlers with them, and they are known to change the position of children's teeth.
They are proven to help prevent cot death, so I say use them. But remove them before they are toddlers.

dinosaurkisses · 25/09/2018 14:34

There’s a huge difference between a child using a dummy 24/7 and another using it just for self settling and night or for naps.

BlaaBlaaBlaa · 25/09/2018 14:35

@spiky my DS had a dummy until he was 3 and is the world's loudest chatterbox and has been since he could talk. Hi language skills have always exceed age appropriate milestones. I suspect it's not the dummy causing this issue.

darceybussell · 25/09/2018 14:42

I wish DS would take one, we've tried three different brands and he gives them all a token suck and then spits them out! Bit fed up of him using me as a dummy so every so often we have another go, but he doesn't seem to be able to get the hang of it!

Strokethefurrywall · 25/09/2018 14:45

DS1 took a pacifier from about 4 weeks when he had bad wind (god bless my mum for persevering with keeping it in his mouth!)

DS2 had a pacifier in his mouth from the evening he was born - he was the world's suckiest baby and I had overactive let down approximately 16 hours after he was born, he was that efficient at nursing.

DS1 had his until 1 year old (he favored nighttime bottles until he was about 2.5), DS2 had his "soo-soo" until he was nearing 3 years.

Absolute lifesavers!

DieAntword · 25/09/2018 14:46

We use in bed but not out of bed because I don’t want it interfering with vocalisations but it is a big help at night.

MeadowHay · 25/09/2018 14:52

I love all the naive pregnant ladies saying how they don't want their baby to have a dummy, especially the one who said that they don't like the way babies faces look when they're sucking on a dummy . Wait til your baby is born and then decide. You might find that when your baby won't sleep without sucking and the only alternative is permanently breastfeeding for most of every single day or listening to baby scream, you may change your mind . I think DH and I lasted about 2 weeks and I don't even know how we managed that long tbh . It didn't interfere with breastfeeding at all either.

Roomba · 25/09/2018 15:00

Never thought about them much when pregnant with DS1. Then my mother bought some for us in advance, and my ex went apeshit - he had very strong feelings about them even though he wasn't the one doing the feeding and soothing! Luckily DS1 never needed one.

When DS2 arrived he had awful reflux and would have latched onto me literally 24/7 as he wicked to soothe the reflux. It was awful and a dummy helped both of us enormously. My ex complained and I told him exactly where he could shove the dummy if he didn't like it! DS gradually stopped wanting it any more by the time he was six months. I'd never have been able to drive, cook, wash or sleep without constant screaming without them.

Roomba · 25/09/2018 15:01

Wicked = sucked! ^^

Nelliee · 25/09/2018 15:07

I tried and failed to introduce one. My little one loves his thumb too much. I think it's always worth trying to help with settling.

LondonJax · 25/09/2018 15:09

We didn't buy any for DS - our only child. Then he had to have an emergency procedure on his heart and the consultant told me to run to the Friends shop and buy a couple of dummies. As someone said above, it helps to comfort when there's painful or worrying procedures involved.

DS kept his dummy until he was seven months old. Loved it, couldn't sleep without it. Then we went on holiday and one night he literally threw it out of his cot. Wouldn't take it back so I left it. And that was 'bye bye dummy' time....

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