Helppp

[JJR17]

I'm currently 26 weeks pregnant, and I absolutely HATE seeing people ! I just feel so much better when I'm taking it easy with my family and my boyfriend at home. But because I am young, my mum is constantly on at me about not seeing people, and my boyfriend is starting to worry too. They're worried that I won't leave the house once the baby is here. I just feel antisocial while I'm pregnant and don't want to see anyone ! What can I say to them to get off my back? Have tried EVERYTHING !!!!

What do they mean by seeing people? Are they trying to get you out with friends etc in the evenings? Do you see people at work?

I think not going out contributed to my pnd (so maybe they are just coming from a caring place?)

It's hard being heavily pregnant (I am too) no energy to do anything😆

They just mean going out to see friends really. I'm just sooo antisocial right now and have been most of the pregnancy haha&I don't work so I'm in the house all day pretty much:/

I totally understand they're trying to be supportive but it's doing more harm than good now:( it just makes me really stressed and feel like I have to force myself to do something I'm really not comfortable doing just to keep them quiet. It's more my mum than my boyfriend. He's more subtle about it haha

I think they're right tbh. If you aren't working and aren't leaving the house you are going to be very vulnerable to isolation and MH issues post birth.

Is there a reason you aren't working?

If you’re not getting out of the house or seeing people at all then I can see why they’re concerned. It’s not healthy to be inside all day not talking to anyone and I would worry that it could lead to PND.
I’m currently 26 weeks and to be honest socialising is the last thing on my mind at the moment (I’m knackered), and work freelance from home so don’t see people through work but it’s my third child so I see people every day on the school run/at toddler groups, and I volunteer for a charity a couple of times a week, for example.

I didn't have a job before getting pregnant, and couldn't get any work early in the pregnancy as I started showing very early on. And I live with both my parents, so I do see people, and I'm excited about going out every day once the baby is here, I just really want to take this time to relax and do what I want

And I go to my boyfriend's house at least once a week and see people while I'm there too haha

Are you pulling your weight at home in terms of cooking/housework etc?

Just a word of warning, if you’re health is ok, it’s a really good idea to be as active as possible in the run up to the birth. It will help with the birthing and recovery. There are plenty of things you could be doing to keep active that don’t involve socialising eg Long walks, swimming and aqua natal, gardening, housework, food shopping. It’s not a good idea to make yourself housebound for no reason as it could make you less fit for the birth. Activities that get your heart rate up are good for you and baby.

Tbh if you were my DD hanging around the house all day, pregnant and without a job, I would be worried - and possibly annoyed if you weren’t pulling your weight with housework etc.

I get you, im naturally a ‘lone wolf’ who loves chilling by myself or with OH. Always have been. Don’t pressure yourself (or let others) to make you feel like you HAVE to socialize, because for me that stresses me out!

I would say, though, if you ever feel down then stepping out of your comfort zone does sometimes help. Sometimes I dred family parties as Im incredibly awkward and feel exposed, but if I try to force myself to enjoy them then I usually do and come home thinking ‘actually, that was a nice day!’

At the end of the day, youre an adult and soon to be a mum, your health, including mental, is paramount to ensure you are ready to cope with the new arrival. Don’t let anyone force you to do something you don’t want to.

Of course I'm pulling my weight in the house. I do as much as I can to help out, but I am suffering with spd also, and have been told I have a short torso so that is starting to put a lot of strain on my body, as I have a small frame as well. I also walk the dog as much as I can so I'm not just sat around feeling sorry for myself. I just don't feel like socialising

Thank you:)

Well all you can do then is keep telling them you’re as happy as you are. Try and keep as active as possible as it really will help with labour.

Thank you everyone I will do x

Sounds like you’re being helpful and as active as possible- so just keep on doing what you’re doing and tell them you don’t feel like socialising at the moment. Good luck with the birth and enjoy the rest of your pregnancy

Thank you so much:) I appreciate it a lot x