Due dates

[AliceRR]

I’m nearly 20 w pregnant and due on 10 Feb with my first baby.

I’m wondering is there a general rule of thumb as to whether first baby is usually born early or late or should I just expect to give birth around 2 week’s before or after my due date (hopefully not much early obviously but I realise babies can come early!)

Just thinking about mat leave etc.

Is end of Jan realistic for mat leave? I don’t know how I will feel when I’m 8 months pregnant and possibly huge! I do have holiday to use so may be able to go mid-Jan and plan to take a full year...

TIA

Early or late it's completely random .

I aimed to go off 2 weeks before the date... as tine got closer and I was massive (it was summer and boiling) I decided to go off 3 weeks before.

After several days of contractions, in and out of hospital dd finally came on her due date.

In reality I didn't "need" the extra week but I was exhausted so was nice to have the time just to sit and read or watch entrie boxsets on Netflix

Yes I think winter is probably a good time time to be heavily pregnant, in some ways, due to the heat etc.

Bad weather could be an issue too (ice / snow) but I would have the option to work from home, which might help.

I don’t know when I will be asked to say but my work will want an indication at some point of when I want to go.

And also, depending on how early I plan to go, this determines how much holiday I take now and book for Christmas etc.

I have about 4 weeks holiday to take...

I started maternity leave officially 3 weeks before DS due date.
But I had 5 weeks holiday saved up and u used all of that before DS was born as I worked in an active role, was knackered and was on crutches with SPD.
I was an elcs so I knew when DS was coming but was glad to have the rest before hand.

I had so much leave due to when I was going off that I did 4 day weeks for about 5 weeks before I went off. I decided not to take any leave over but ask your employer as they may let you tag leave on to the end of your maternity ( if in an office job don't forget to check if you get bank holidays added on as well)

@MsHopey I think I have SPD / pelvic girdle (if that’s what you’re talking about). Haven’t spoke to MW yet but will next time I see her.
If you have any tips about that then these are most welcome! I am worried it will get worse but will just work from home more if need be

@Happygummibear My place allowbyoi to carry over any unused annual leave to the st year and you get bank hol so there is an advantage to going later as I will have more time with baby

But I might take some long weekends now as I do find myself more tired etc even if second trimester

With my first I gave work my due date as my maternity start date. I planned to take 2 weeks leave but took 3 weeks as was too difficult moving and not sleeping well. I was 1 week overdue.

I ended up with a year off.... 3 weeks baby was inside.... but I did have a month of unpaid leave which we factored in to our savings.

For me personally by the time I got to 10 months my lo was walking and I was exhausted from that! I also felt the need to be around adults and get some of my life back.... I went back to work part time on a phased so I haven't had many "full" weeks as I have had to take odd days off

@Happygummibear Well yes I suppose I just don’t know how I’ll feel about going back to work. I might not want to go back (seems likely) or I might be itching to get back to it. Also the finances are a factor that I have to bear in mind as I’d like a year off and I’m trying to work on the budget now but I don’t reallg know how much everything is going to cost and how difficult it would be.

I am due on 12th Feb, so very similar to you. I'm planning to start mat leave on 25th Jan. It's slightly easier for me though, as this is my DC2 and DD arrived 11 days early, so I know there is a chance of this happening again!
I don't get annual leave in my job so I just start mat leave when it starts, but I would consider how long you can afford to have off work. Remember you can always start mat leave earlier than you original said, but not later if you are still feeling well!

@Katinkak8 yes very similar dates! what do u mean? Once I give them a date to go on leave, I can’t go later? I haven’t specified a date yet but they have put in the holiday diary that I will be on mat leave from my due date if that’s what you mean

@AliceRR, sorry if I was unclear. If you've put your due date, then that's fine! But say I was to put down that I was going on mat leave on 12th jan (for example), if I felt really well and thought I could work for another week or two, I wouldn't be allowed to take my mat leave later than the 12th. That's how my work does things anyway! Hope that makes sense!
Have you had your 20 week scan yet? Mine is Tuesday. I'm excited but nervous!

I used a weeks holiday just before Xmas, had the Xmas bank holidays off and then my mat leave officially started after that at 38 weeks. So I was off work from 36.5 weeks ish. Baby was then 8 days overdue and I was so bored doing nothing waiting for him to arrive! I had a wonderful pregnancy but had a 2 hour commute to work each way so that was the only reason I went off earlier, just incase labour started and I had to travel all the way home. If I had a similar pregnancy next time then I personally would finish later.
If you think you already have SPD though, you might find it more painful the later you get so it's a tough one. As PP has said you can always bring it forward if you need to.

@Katinkak8 No need to apologise! To be honest they didn’t actually ask me when I thought I’d go (maybe because it was early) but they just asked my due date and said they’d use that but presumably I’ll have to give them a date at some stage. With my 20 days hol it will probably work out that I don’t go on mat leave before then anyway but need to work it out properly

My 20 week’s scan is Wednesday! I’m so excited but nervous. Been feeling a lot of movement so hopefully bub is ok but I had heart problems and stuff when I was born so just hope everything is ok!

Are u going to find out the sex?

@boodles101 That’s the thing - I worry about going too early as I imagine being bored at home alone, not be able to do much and just waiting for baby to arrive!

But need to see how I’m feeling as you say. I am worried about the PGP / SPV getting worse as I’m only 20 week’s today!

Working from home might be a good option or doing half days (since it will be hol to start with) as I can potentially stay home but keep busy

My 3 weeks before I spent cleaning, preparing ready made meals for the freezer, reading, watching tv and generally relaxing.

To begin with I didn't want to go back to work but around 7 months i missed it, but I am in a job I enjoy.

Working out the finances. Do a list now of your current outgoings for you and anyone else in the house.
Average food shop if done well is around £75 a week. By knowing how much you needto cover you can work out how much you need to save to ensure essential house hold bills are paid for.

Depending on how much your company pays for mat leave, you should be able to do a rough estimate and then when smp comes in you will be able to see how much you will be short by so how much needs to be saved.

Nappies you can generally get a pack for £5. On a good day you will get through average 5 nappies. So you basically need a pack of nappies a week. Work on a pack of wipes a week (maybe 2) so £1-£2 On wipes. If you want to be really eco... buy some flannels but it's a bit of a faff. Don't forget there are loads of vouchers out there and free samples. If you use pampers sign up to the pampers app and scan your receipts to get points.

Also greenjinn app often has cashback for Tesco and Sainsburys on baby products.

Food for baby. Tin of formula is £10 average. I didn't FF but I think it's a tin a week (Someone correct if wrong) if you BF it's another saving.

You don't really need anything else apart from clothes which you can get cheap. Look out for Sainsburys sales when they have the extra 25% off. Or nearly new sales and Facebook are great for second hand things.

If you want any more tips on money saving etc let me know. Due to debts we have been on a shoe string but still been able to do loads and buy all that we need and not go without.

@AliceRR you could probably put your due date down as the start of mat leave if you are using annual leave beforehand, but if baby comes early, your mat leave will automatically start then.
Fingers crossed that your little one is healthy. No, we're not finding out the sex, are you?
Happygummibear has given you some great budgeting tips there. I would also add buying plastic toys second hand. We bought everything brand new when we first had our DD. This time we're saving money wherever we can! Babies grow out of/get bored of stuff so quickly!

@Happygummibear Thanks that’s really helpful!

@Katinkak8 Yes I’m aware mat leave will start early and I don’t know obviously if that will be the case or not. Hope baby is fine and scan shows no issue for you too. I thought I wanted a surprise but now I think I want to find out!

Ha ha, I completely understand! We had surprise last time but this time I'm much more tempted to find out!