Pregnant again after two consecutive TFMRs

[BeccaAnnJones]

Hi there

I’m not sure if anyone’s been through this but wanted to reach out just in case.

In November 2017, at 21 weeks gestation, I had an induced termination due to spina bifida on the back of the skull, preventing the brain from forming normally. Our beautiful baby girl came into the world on Nov 9.

Two months later, I fell pregnant again. Then at 21 weeks again we had our second induced termination as our little boy had a severely enlarged kidney and severely enlarged ventricles on the brain. We had a post mortem which confirmed this but also confirmed that our baby had a small chin and a slightly curved palette but no cleft palette. The post mortem confirmed that they didn’t see it as being chromosomal.

Although our consultant said it wasn’t necessary, we requested genetic testing. However, after one period I have since fallen pregnant again and I’m now 11 weeks pregnant. So genetic testing might not be possible.

My 12 week scan is next week and I’m absolutely terrified.

I keep having outbursts of uncontrollable tears and anxiety

This pregnancy wasn’t planned and DH basically did the deed without realising eventhough I told him not to. I’m so scared that I’ve fallen pregnant so quickly after a tfmr again.

I’m so scared that history will repeat itself for a third time. All I want is a healthy baby. I don’t have any living children and it’s what I want more than anything else in the world.

Has anyone else had consecutive tfmrs and have gone on to have a healthy baby?

Thanks

Bec x

I have no experience, I just wanted to say that I’m so sorry for your losses 💐

I hope this baby is perfect for you xx

Do they think your previous losses were caused by a genetic problem or were they simply terrible luck? Could they still do genetic testing despite your pregnancy?

I'm so sorry for what you've experienced and I hope this baby is perfect in every way

Actually, just reread your post. If your consultant didn't deem genetic testing necessary, they must think that your losses weren't caused by a genetic problem? I hope this gives you some hope, although I totally understand your worry.

This pregnancy wasn’t planned and DH basically did the deed without realising eventhough I told him not to

What do you mean by this, what happened? It sounds worrying

@Hopelessly, I thought that too.

Thanks for your words.

Sorry what I meant to say was (apologies for being really graphic here...but you are asking)

I told my husband that I felt like I might be ovulating the morning before we had sex in the evening and I told him that morning that he shouldn’t ejaculate inside me if we were to have sex. We ended up having sex that night (passion got the best of us 😣)and afterwards I asked him if he came and he said yes, to which I replied WHERE?! Then he had a melt down and panicked (as did I! I Sat on the toilet for 15mins hoping everything would come out of me). He’s always been forgetful but I was so annoyed, as was he with himself! Guess for the last 17 months he’s not needed to think about that as we’ve either been pregnant or actively trying. I know it sounds like a stupid contraception but it worked for 7 months last year, when I went off the pill (to prepare my body for trying to conceive) but didn’t want to get pregnant yet!

He’s not a malicious person so there’s no need to be worried by that comment 😊

Regardless, that’s not the basis of my concern to be honest. What I’m concerned about is having the same issues again. My bereavement midwife has asked my consultant if genetic testing can go ahead (4 weeks ago) but has not had a response. It’s times like this I wish I could afford to go private.

I have no experience with this but couldn’t read and run! Good luck OP hopefully this will be your happy ending 💐

Thank you @thetimehascometo 😊

I'm so sorry for your losses. Not consecutive but I had a tmfr due to ventriculomegaly last year at 26 weeks. 6 weeks later I fell pregnant again by accident. I'm now sat here looking at my 5 week old baby. There is hope x

Our oldest child has a very rare genetic condtion that has a 1 in 4 chance in each pregnancy. It cannot be detected on ultrasounds. Before he was diagnosed but we knew something was wrong with him I fell pregnant but decided not to continue incase the pregnancy was affected.

I'm now pregnant with my 4th baby and my other 3 children are all unaffected we had a cvs test at 11 weeks.

Would a cvs/harmony test be an option for you? I no you can't look for anything specific. I would suggest getting in contact with the person that suggested genetic testing as they maybe able to fast track you now your pregnant. I really hope you get good news this time round. Xx

@iamloading @lbnm19 thank you so much for sharing your experiences with me ❤️. I’m parying that things turn out as well as what you’ve experienced in the end xxxx

I'm so sorry for what you've been through. I had a tfmr due to a lethal skeletal dysplasia. My baby was born in Oct 2016. Despite being referred for genetic testing on the nhs it never happened so in sept 2017 we went private. In between having the tests and getting the results I fell pregnant again. Fortunately they eventually came back clear and our DD was born 3 months ago. Very anxious pregnancy as I'm sure you can imagine.

Given how long the genetic testing took from having them done to getting results, a cvs might be a better option if you/the medics feel you need it. Perhaps have a chat with your midwife?

I was deemed 'high risk' and so was consultant led and had scans every 4 weeks. This was reassuring but I grew to hate scans at the same time. The nervousness that something would go wrong didn't leave me. My hospital were very sympathetic to what we'd been through. Hope you find the same x

@welshmammy123 thank you so much for sharing your experiences and so sorry you had to go through that.

It’s really lovely that you have your DD now

Unfortunately, during my last pregnancy the hospital said that there was no need for a scan in between 12-20 weeks eventhough I’d asked and asked.

Really disappointing, given the outcome.

I’m going to refuse to leave the hospital until I get a second scan booked in at 15 weeks as it’s making me too anxious.

Thanks again

Bec x