My pregnant girlfriend doesn’t have feelings for me anymore and has ended the relationship

[DesperateDad21]

Hi all, I’m new to this site and I really need some advice.
I’ve been with my fiancée (ex) for 8 months and the relationship was amazing we were so happy and had loads planned together. We have recently found out that she was pregnant around 3 weeks ago and found out she was 4 weeks gone and we were both over the moon and couldn’t wait for this amazing blessing, she is now 7 weeks pregnant and last week she started to become very distant with me and would t come anywhere near me... she hates the smell of me and would not let me hug or kiss her, and she moved out back with her mother and since then we hardly spoke and I’ve been wondering where did I go wrong and what have I done?? But she told me I haven’t dont nothing wrong at all Now at the start of the week she has told me she doesn’t feel anything for me anymore and doesn’t want to be with me. She said she still loves me and when I said to her if you don’t want to be with me then why are you still trying to talk to me? She then told me it doesn’t feel right when we’re not talking but when we do talk she replies with either thanks or okay and nothing else. I have told her I am here for her and I will give her the time and space she needs. I am so confused and heartbroken over this situation and I don’t know where to turn I’m completely lost. I love this girl to absolute prices and I can’t imagine life without her. I’ve been told by family and friends that it is to do with the hormones and she will snap out of it but can people really lose all feelings and emotions for someone they love due to hormones? Any advice would be amazing I’m really praying that it is hormones and I get her back soon. Thanks

Hmm... in terms of her not liking your smell that sounds like hormones. But please respect that these feeling are very real to her and hormones are not an excuse to dismiss them (not suggesting you are doing this). Respect her physical space and remember she has a right not to be touched, kissed, hugged whether your relationship is on or off. I advise you stick by your words and respect her space. If you are a good boyfriend I hope she comes back to you. X

Thankyou

She has told me that she loves me but she don’t know if she feels anything for me anymore which I respect her choice regardless. She has told me that when she is back from a family holiday that we can speak and hopefully go from there which is understandable she probably wants family time. But going from telling me that she can’t lose me and loves me so much one day and then a few days later saying all this, I do respect her wanting space and time to think about her feelings, she told me she doesn’t feel herself and has gone off her food and can’t sleep and even when it comes to family sometimes she can’t stand them. No matter what her decision is I respect that and will let her do what she needs to so that she can start feeling herself again. Thankyou for the advice

I don't want to be that bitch. But from my experiences and friends experiences I think she's been dealing with not wanting to be with you for a while. Like you said, you don't one day be madly in love and the next you love somebody but want nothing to do with them?
No amount of hormones could make that happen.
Getting caught up in the excitement of having a child can make people the opposite way (I don't love you, but let's be together for the kid and pretend we're in a perfectly unhappy relationship kind of situation)
If one party of the relationship even has to consider wether they want to be in the relationship, it's not a relationship worth having (in that respect, obviously be there as an amazing father and Co parent) imo.
But I really hope everything turns out how you want it to, I really do.

I'm so sorry that this is happening right now, it must be so so hard for you. I don't know if this will help but something a bit similar has happened with me.

From when I was about 9 weeks pregnant I physically could not stand to be touched by my husband - hugs, kisses, hand holds and even just sitting next to him. I found that I just really craved my personal space and needed to not be touched. My husband found this really hard because it was very much out of character for me. I suffered with and still have really bad morning, noon and night sickness. Quite often it was set off by the smell of his deodorant, the toothpaste he was using, beard oils just all sorts really turned my tummy. He just irritated me to hell as well and I found myself snapping at him all the time. Nothing he could do was right.

I feel really bad writing this about him because I do love him so so much and I'm ashamed of how irrational I was being and how mean. Bless him he has put up with it and gave me space when I needed it and bit his tongue often. He's told me now how much my behaviour upset him and made him wonder what on earth was going on with me. All I can do now is apologise to him now. I'm 16 weeks now, my sickness has started to improve, I'm sleeping a bit more, my anxiety around my pregnancy has started getting better and I feel a lot less down than I have since all the sickness started. I think because of all of this I'm starting to feel and act a lot more like myself and my husband has said he has got me back.

I guess I just wanted you to know that the way your fiancee is behaving may not necessarily mean she doesn't love you and still want to be with you. Give her time but remember to look after yourself too.

Horrible for you. I would back off,let her know you're waiting if she changes her mind but you respect her decision. And maybe tell her mum that too so her mum can reassure her you'll still be there.

Tried to reply to your PM but mumsnet had a problem i can receive your message so go right ahead

Hi OP, you sound like such a great man! Hopefully this is all just hormones and stress about the baby news for her and in a few weeks she'll come around. I'm sure she still loves you and misses you but everything has suddenly changed for her and maybe she just needs some time.

On the other hand, trying not to be the voice of doom- are you 100% sure the baby is yours? X

@adoggymama

I really do hope it’s hormones as before she fell pregnant we were inseparable and lived together and spent everyday with eachother. She has said she still loves me but won’t say it if you get what I mean because of her feelings are everywhere and she don’t know if it’s hormonal or real she doesn’t want to give me false hope.

I am positive I am the father of the child but if there was a slight chance that I wasn’t and she needed someone there to be a father figure I would most definitely stand up and do everything I could to provide for them both

@DesperateDad21 you sound like an amazing father! Hopefully it all works out and you have your little family :) At least you'll always have your child.

It probably is the hormones! I didn’t hate my partner when I was first pregnant but for the first few weeks he smelt like raw onions to me and I couldn’t stand it 😂 (he didn’t smell of onions before I fell pregnant or after my first trimester) I couldn’t kiss him or go too close because the smell made me want to vom!

She’s probably just very emotional, pregnancy does funny things to you! Just give her some space for a few weeks and hopefully it’ll sort itself out!

DesperateDad21 so how is your relationship now with your baby in the family? Are yall back together?

Currently in first trimester!

I can confirm at around 5 weeks I questioned my whole life and whether I even liked my partner... I've questioned so much stuff....

For me 4-6/7weeks was horrific

Nearly 10 weeks now some days I just want him to leave me the f alone and then other days I want to snuggle inseparable.....

My hormones are rife I don't know if I'm coming or going.

Patience is key

Hi guys just after a little advice my girlfriend is now 6 months pregnant and she is constantly putting me down or saying she feels like I should be with her. We are currently in lock down and we do not live together yet she also sufferes with ocd and depression and anxiety, this was before she was pregnant and whilst being pregnant its all just been amplified, I know alot of what she says Is due to hormones and stress, but each day now she is getting quiet nasty with me nothing i say or do is good enough is there anything I could do to make her feel more secure or a way of getting a cross how much she actually means to me, this is our first child... she is 19 and im 25. Any help or advice would be appreciated thank you all.

This has recently happened to me. Me and my ex partner. She broke up with me on the 6th of January. No explanation nothing. She is 23 weeks pregnant and has blocked me on everything and kicked me out. She is now speaking to other boys and craving their attention. While I’m left clueless and heartbroken with no answers. She informed me that contact will be made when my child is here. I just don’t understand how you can plan a child with someone and once it happens they decide to throw you off and go after other boys. No have a single care you broke up

Hy guys please help me I don't know what to do anymore this thing got me a depression my woman is pregnant we were fine all along before pregnancy but now she insult me calling me names swearing at me saying I'm not a man that she wants I have nothing while I'm doing everything for her she never went to bad hungry ilove that women but now ifeel it to much I'm nothing to her anymore please any advice

I’m dealing with this issue right now currently and I am destroyed about it. My now ex girlfriend broke up with she is now 6 months pregnant. Everything was so blissful between us but since she has gotten pregnant she treated me like I’m nothing. I literally did everything for her and surrounded my life around her. It’s like everything I did frustrated her and nothing I could do will ever please her. What hurts even worse is she left and moved back with her ex which isn’t a guy it’s a stud that basically gave me hell behind her ever since she found out we were a thing. I’ve dealt with and put up with so much behind this girl I feel so betrayed and torn about this whole situation and it’s so much that I am leaving out but I don’t know what to do I’m over loosing it.