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Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

8 week old baby just won't stop crying

22 replies

bowgumdrop2018 · 10/09/2018 17:06

I'm at my edge of sanity I really am my baby was very quiet and peaceful the first month of her life and now all she does is cry which then turns into a never ending scream which will then trigger her acid reflux which caused even more crying then once that stops hiccups come along and start the scream again ...I just don't know what to do anymore I am finding myself crying all day and feel lifeless, she sleeps well at night but will not sleep at all during the day or if so it's a 15 minute nap then that's it for 4 or so hours then maybe get another 15 min nap or so .... I have learnt the difference between a normal winge then the painful cry and vast majority of the day it's just the usual scream and it's all day 😪 I'm struggling so much to stay strong I really am she is not happy laying down alone or in her bouncer and will only be happy if in someone's arms and even then she still crys 60% of the time ..does anyone have any suggestions on how to cope with this or how to improve her moods 😔 And please no it's all worth it and it will pass comments ( I understand that but right now it doesn't feel believable) I feel as if I'm doing this all wrong and she hates me

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Funnyface1 · 10/09/2018 17:15

If it's pain then it's not because she hates you and there's nothing you can do to improve her mood.

I was where you are 2 years ago so I get it. Is she on anything for the reflux yet?

Prembabymum · 10/09/2018 17:17

Could it be a dairy allergy? My lo had reflux and it was caused by an allergy to dairy and soy. The crying was one of our first clues. You will be prescribed dpecial formula if you're bottle feeding (although they come in stages with neocate being the most effective amd they will likely try you on a cheaper one first) if you are breast feeding cut dairy and soy out of your diet. It will take about 2 weeks for the dairy and soy to come out of their system so won't work straight away. Very common to be allergic to both. Good luck!

BertrandRussell · 10/09/2018 17:19

What happens if you offer her more milk?

barneymcgroo · 10/09/2018 17:23

You're not doing it wrong, and she doesn't hate you. You are her world.

Mine didn't like to be put down at all, so I had them in a sling from the very early weeks. (He's 7 months now, and in it right now). I ended up getting one that didn't need a huge kerfuffle getting in and out of, which made a huge difference.

I hope it all gets better soon - at the time, it feels so all-encompassing, so look after yourself too.

user1468348545 · 10/09/2018 17:28

Please don't feel bad! My son developed acid reflux later than that, around a year old and it was horrendous. It sounds like baby is just incredibly uncomfortable. Try switching milk brands, and if all else fails a trip to your gp and they will try baby gaviscon etc until they find something that helps if that is the cause.
Keep strong. I know it's hard but you are doing everything you can!!

Fatted · 10/09/2018 17:29

I have been where you are now with my eldest. It really wasn't a pleasant time!

Is she getting any treatment for her reflux? Take her back to the GP and keep going back until she gets something to help.

Use a dummy. It helped my DS so much.

Avoid laying her flat as much as physically possible. Hold her for naps. Accept that house work and everything else will just have to wait. It is not easy, but honestly my DS was happier when he'd had some sleep and holding him for naps was the only way of doing it.

Put white noise on repeat to stop the crying. My DS stopped crying with white noise and music. I spent many evenings listening to the same song on repeat because it stopped him crying!

I took DS out for a walk in the car seat on the pushchair every morning. It kept him quiet and he would usually nap then too.

It wasn't a good time back in those early days. But we got through it. It did ge better with medication and weaning early. Stay strong!

Tilliebean · 10/09/2018 17:30

I second a sling. DD was never a great sleeper and only wanted held. She would only do 15-20 minute naps. In a sling she would easily do an hour to 90 minutes. It sucked as I couldn’t really sit down but the quiet was bliss!!

pastabest · 10/09/2018 17:36

Sounds like colic.

Try a sling.

There's a growth spurt at around 8 weeks as well so you might find you have to offer milk more regularly for a little bit.

I always work through the list:

Are they hungry- offer milk see if that works
If they aren't hungry do they have wind- leap around the house trying to wind the baby
If they aren't hungry and they don't seem to be windy are they tired? Furiously attempt to rock baby to sleep or sway aimlessly with them in the sling
Baby still clawing at me and screaming, perhaps they are bored? puts Cbeebies on, baby cheers up immediately and I rock in a corner sobbing and eating a twix

You won't believe me now but after having two babies that did this from 6 weeks through to about 12 weeks I promise things do usually start to improve drastically between 10-12 weeks. stares at 12 week old and dares them not to prove me wrong

bowgumdrop2018 · 10/09/2018 18:28

My baby is on infant gaviscon but only prescribed late last week so maybe it's not had time to work .. and baby feeds every 3 hours and has 5 ounces each feed but some feeds she only takes 3 or 4 ... I wind on every ounce and half and get around 1-2 burps so I believe she also holds back wind which catches up on her hours later as the reflux episodes is never directly after a feed ... I elevate her always she is never flat on her back and I've been doing it this way for weeks now ..I just want my baby to be happy and content 😔 I hate feeling as if I'm failing at being her mum when a few weeks ago she was a happy content baby and now she crys/ screams all day ... I will look into getting a sling and this at I may feel a little more at ease ..I'm finding myself very anxious to the point whenever she crys i am shaking and close to crying and my heart races 😔 I don't get a chance to eat andblucky to get a 5 minute shower ...I think we are both just having a really tough time at the moment and I am desperate for her to just be happy that's all ...

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barneymcgroo · 10/09/2018 18:32

If you've got a local baby buy swap sell Facebook site, someone is bound to have a sling they will lend you. My baby napped like a champ in a sling, and just might give you a bit of breathing space.

MustStopSnacking28 · 10/09/2018 18:53

Sounds like you’re having a tough time Sad really hope it gets better for you soon. I can’t claim to be an expert but my baby is 16 weeks old and I would try the following if he does the same:

  • sling which he cries harder in to start with but then falls asleep so don’t give up too soon!
  • switched to pushchair part of pram which I know you aren’t sposed to do til 6 months but ds hated the carrycot so swapped him to pushchair at 14 weeks and he loves it. Will sleep in that usually. I put him in the kitchen with the extractor fan on!!
  • white noise machine you can get them on amazon pretty cheap. I haven’t tried the toys as the machine works constantly so I think that’s better personally
  • usual stuff like check if hungry, burp etc although it sounds to me like you have already got that sort of stuff covered.

You’re doing a great job! Really hope one of the suggestions from someone works xx

Prembabymum · 10/09/2018 19:01

Op gaviscon usually doesnt help; ask for ranitadine; it makes a huge difference as long as you correct the dose in line with their weight.
Also important to remember that reflux is a symptom so it's important to find the cause; sometimes that's as simple as a weak valve which will strengthen with age but usually its an allergy. Strongly advise joining reflux support groups on fb.
It's such a hard time. My lo came 10 weeks early so all these things were spotted quickly for us as he was having so many appointments but for most they don't get answers so you need to push for them; it's not normal for babies to cry all the time and it's so hard for parents when they do. It will get easier I promise but you need to get the right medication and the right healthcare. Xxx

Pebblesandfriends · 10/09/2018 19:05

Hi to your Gp to rule out allergies. Several of my friends had babies with dairy intolerance/ allergies and it sounds similar. All improved dramatically so don't worry. You sound worn out Brew

ohnothanks · 10/09/2018 19:15

Definitely spunds a lot like allergy to milk protein. The screaming, the delayed vomiting/discomfort...

It is horrific and unless you've been there it is very hard to understand.

If the doc is content there is nothing major medically wrong then you can try a hudrolysed milk formula. Boots or any chemist can order it in -no prescriptiom.required but ££ is as it is expensive. Brands include Atamil Pepti (which is still too milky for some babies with CMPA but is the most palatable by miles), Nutramigen right through to Nutramigen AA and Neocate which both taste vile but are completely.milk free. Goats' milk and soy are not (usually) suitable for young babies with CMPA. Nor is lactose-free milk because lactose isn't the problem. Comfort milks are not suitable either as they still usually have unmodified milk protein.

A sympathetic doctor may prescribe it on a trial basis but you may just want to crack on and get evidence/ do something.

Gaviscon can cause problems the other wnd with constipation.

ohnothanks · 10/09/2018 19:18

CMPI is commoner in families with a history of atopic reactions by the way - allergic asthma, hayfever, eczema etc...

Angelmiracle · 10/09/2018 19:21

My DS started this when he was 2 weeks old and when he was 6 weeks old he had fell below his birth weight as I was EBF and my supply had dropped at some point too. He had silent reflux and also was hungry! We got gaviscon which done nothing but constipated him. We landed up to A&E luckily he kicked off and we were took straight to children's ward. 2 paediatricians couldn't believe how bad he was screaming took bloods and gave him paracetamol in a panic. Finally put him on ranitidine (zantac) and my supply had dropped so started mix feeding and added the milk thickener Carobel (got on prescription) to his formula. He was a new baby then. He stayed on both of these until 1 year old. I would go back to GP and insist gaviscon is not working and you've a baby in a lot of pain.

fairylightseverywhere · 10/09/2018 19:23

If you can get to a sling library, I'd really recommend getting a decent one that you and baby are comfortable in, some are very inexpensive especially second hand and they really can be an absolute life saver. My son spent huge chunks of the day in our sling for the first few months of his life, he had almost all his naps in there and he was so happy and content being close to me. I was much more relaxed because he hardly ever cried. I really hope you find something that helps.

Funnyface1 · 10/09/2018 19:23

Gaviscon can and often does constipate babies. It can also be a bit ineffective against the reflux if it's severe. Then you've got 2 problems and your baby really will scream.

When my dd was 6 weeks old we ended up in a&e because she choked while having a reflux episode and stopped breathing. While we were there she screamed the place down and passed some hard yellow rocks in her nappy. They agreed that it wasn't ok and gave us ranitidine for the reflux.

It worked pretty instantly and changed everything for us. What I'm saying is, don't plough on with the gaviscon if it's not helping. Go back and get something stronger prescribed. And watch her poo's. Good luck.

december212 · 10/09/2018 19:27

Gaviscon didn't work for my daughter with aptimal, changed to hipp and it worked great. Trial and error isn't fun tho and wouldn't recommend it. As pp said, definitely keep going back to the doctor. Heard of a few babies with similar symptoms to those you describe who have been diagnosed as dairy intolerant, have been prescribed milk and are now content.

BlueKittens · 10/09/2018 19:41

There could be many reasons and you might not get to the bottom of it but worth trying to. From people I know who’ve gone through this reasons include dairy intolerance (or something else if breastfeeding), hunger so not getting enough breast milk, wind and colic, problems with digestion (eg small passage).

We experienced the colic nightmare and found Dentinox helped settle her. It went around 12 weeks. We also had to do a lot of winding. Sleeping position can be adapted if baby has reflux but I didn’t have this issue.

For your sanity I suggest earplugs and listening to music through earphones just to take the edge off the crying (do not feel guilty about doing this!). Mother and baby groups where it is socially acceptable to be with a crying baby. Walking around the park - ignore anyone seemingly looking at you ‘not attending to your crying baby’ - wear sunglasses if you need to block people out. Nap when baby naps. Most importantly- arrange for a break with the father or family member. Somewhere you can’t hear the cries or ask for them to take the baby for a walk.

It is awful when you are in the midst of it. You’ve got to look after yourself too so don’t feel guilty for attending to your needs too. Your baby does not hate you, it will not affect your bonding and they will not remember this time. Take one day at a time and breathe deeply when you are overwhelmed. Talking to people helps no end as well (the right people though - someone sympathetic and not dissmisive).

Good luck x

BlueKittens · 10/09/2018 19:48

Just remembered- Dummies worked for mine to soothe when starting to cry ... helped stop it getting worse. I went through many brands but the Mam 0+ months were the best for her little mouth. I held it for a minute until she got a good latch

www.waitrose.com/ecom/products/mam-0month-night-soother-pack-of-2-assorted/820387-234141-234142?gclid=EAIaIQobChMIyuuDyYyx3QIVh7TtCh34og1vEAQYASABEgLA__D_BwE&gclsrc=aw.ds&dclid=CM2i8cyMsd0CFcg8Gwod1q4N9w

RosemaryLemonxx · 10/09/2018 20:02

When my son had the gaviscon , I was told it should work straight away. He also was prescribed ranitidine, that didn't help either. He was lactose intolerant. Could be colic though. It's always worth asking the health visitor for some advice if you are struggling. I'm does get extremely hard when you just don't know what is wrong! You obviously know your baby, so ask for some advice or go back to the docs x

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