Perfect Prep machines

[esw21]

Baby is due 4th November. I've made it clear to people I don't want to use a perfect prep machine. Firstly I don't think they're 100% safe, not enough research on them. And secondly, they're not needed. But MIL keeps going on about me using one and I really feel pressured into having to use one. She also mentioned of getting one for her house to use anyway. I'm really stressing out and having sleepless nights over this. Got to mention, this is my first child and I've been really struggling mentally during my pregnancy. Please help x

Just don't use one if you don't want to use one

I would recommend growing a thicker skin if this is keeping you up at night, and I mean that with kindness, there are seriously more important things to be worrying about as a parent.

Your baby, your rules (and I used one)
Are you planning on breast or formula feeding? It’s unlikely you’ll be leaving baby with mil or anyone else (bar it’s Dad) anytime soon so just ignore - if she gets one discuss when the time comes (I’d send ready made formula in that case or expressed milk if you bf) - she’ll be the one wasting her money.

Why is your MIL so keen on you getting one? Has she used them before for other grandchildren?

I would politely tell her not to buy one as it would end up being unused and therefore a waste of her money. If she really wants to contribute something towards the feeding aspect she could buy you your baby bottles? Or some formula?

I used a perfect prep for my DS from about 5 months when I started to combi feed but I totally understand if you're not comfortable using one, it's a personal choice.

You could always also say to your MIL your thinking of breastfeeding (even if u aren't) just to stop her from going on about the perfect prep!

She sounds quite interfering but it's probably coming from a good place. Hope you are ok xxx

Is your intention to FF? But if a waste of money for your MIL if you’re hoping to give BF a go.

I hold my hands up as a convert to PP machines- I wouldn’t be without mine. Having said that, I think you have a MIL issue rather than a Perfect Prep problem.

Make it clear to her that it won’t be needed- my PP is great for the house, but when we’re out or when DD stays at my parents we use the pre-made bottles which are much handier and require zero equipment.

How often is baby likely to be up at her house for substantial periods of time? I would be a bit worried about a tub of opened powdered formula sitting for weeks or months as it’s only being used for a bottle or two every week.

I have a close relative exactly like this so I understand how frustrating it is! Why is it so hard for some people to understand that you are the parent not them?!

Anyway, the only thing I could suggest is to explain to her why they're not recommended and also the fact that it's the difference between 2 minutes and 5 minutes which is obviously valuable at night but not so much of a big deal in the day. The thing is, if she's anything like my relative it won't matter what you say because she'll be stubborn and thinks she knows best!

I had a PP machines and loved it for the first 2 months but it sent DS' tummy funny. Nothing to do with it being unclean, it was cleaned regularly. It's because PP machines make the bottle to drinking temperature. Formula needs 1 oz 70 degree (ish) water to every 1oz of formula to sterilise it. The problem with the PP machine is that is doesn't dispense enough 70 degree water to sterilise the amount of formula you're making. That's why midwives aren't allowed to promote them. Say you're making an 8oz bottle, you'd need 8oz hot water to sterilise that formula. The PP machine would only dispense say 4ish oz of hot water to dissolve the full 8oz powder and then the rest is cool to make the bottle to drinking temperature. We found that making them with a kettle and putting them under a running tap to cool only took 5 minutes anyway!

I know a lot of people who have used PP machines and loved them, and their children have never had any issues but it's totally your choice. Try and explain the above to her but just be prepared that if she is stubborn it may not make much difference! Personally I'd just make sure I made all the bottles when at her home and wouldn't let the baby stay over if I thought she was going to go against my wishes! Good luck

To: BigFatCurlyHeadedFuck
I think you're being a bit harsh. There's many things that are keeping me up at night. For example, I'm only 20, have 2 jobs and I'm about to start my 3 year at a very tough University on a really demanding course. I spend a lot of time on my own as partner works away and feel like I don't have much support. So mentally I'm really struggling. Please don't be judgemental on the 'thickness of my skin'

To: brodiee
She is coming from a good place, she thinks it will help me with the night feeds as I won't be waiting around to make the bottles up myself. And it'll save the baby getting restless and screaming waiting for the bottle. But surely I'll get familiar with baby's feeding times so I could set an alarm to get up and make the bottle ready for the feed? Thank you xxx

Im in the same boat!! First baby due october and keep being told how useful they are etc... in mine and the health professionals i have asked opinions' they are unhealthy as are not sterile!! Its like washing dishes in luke warm water, think about all those germs! Yuck.

And anyway how on earth did mothers survive before they were invented! 🙄

I have been so mad about this too i understand!

I don't get why she would need one for her house. We just bring baby equipment with us when we visit family.

@user1906
Thank God I'm not the only one! I don't know why people pressure other people to get on board with EVERYTHING. I'm more than happy to take advice but as parents it should be what works for us. Regardless of what others think x

@SnuggyBuggy
I think she thinks she will be having the baby over night an awful lot. I have a lot of family so no one will get to see the baby as much as they would like too. Not forgetting that it's important that I actually get time to bond with my baby most importantly!;

I didn't have one with my first but did with my second and it's the best thing I bought. If you don't want to use it though that's your decision.

If they’re not safe, they wouldn’t be on sale surely? I ff my first, didn’t have a perfect prep: my sister does, I don’t know why I didn’t just get one. They’re amazing!
If you don’t want one, don’t get one, it’s a non issue really

If she won't listen to you about not getting a PP then let her waste her money. We have a PP as do most of my FF friends. We love ours. But totally your own choice.

I would say that you're unlikely to have set feeding times at night for quite a while if ever -my baby is 3 months old and her waking times are hit and miss - so your alarm idea may not work.

If this issue is genuinely giving you sleepless nights I suggest you speak to your midwife for some help (said kindly) as in the grand scheme of things, this isn't a big deal. You'll have to start laying the law down OP or you'll be walked over when baby arrives.

@Snipples

I have tried kindly telling her I do not want one and it's my decision as I know what will work best for me but she is really overpowering and challenging. There's lots of other reasons why I'm having sleepless nights as I've explained in another post of mine and I am getting help but still struggling with sleep, can't switch off at all!
P.s. my partner also think I'm always being arsy in these situatuons and doesn't always have my back which makes it even more hard to speak up.

Just keep an open mind! I found the PP a complete godsend - I took it up to the bedroom with me at night so when baby woke i could have a bottle ready to go within a minute or two, giving me just enough time to change their nappy. Before we got it I was having to go downstairs, holding a screaming baby, then make up a fresh bottle, which by the time the kettle boiled and then the bottle was cooled to a safe temperature took 15-20 minutes. By that time the baby would be going crazy, would be wide awake due to being in bright lights, and both of us would struggle to get back to sleep again. Once we had the PP I didn’t even need to get out of bed!!

@welshweasel

I'm totally open minded and I'm not stubborn. By this, I mean that I will get one if I find that I need one. I've tried telling her this and she still won't drop the conversation. It's getting really tiring and doing my head in now. X

@welshweasel Did you keep yours in your bedroom!? Genius! I read about someone on here who bought a 2nd one, changed the filter and sterilised it and just kept it upstairs for night feeds. Truly living the dream!

That's what I suspected OP and it's ok to say no. I don't really get the baby sleepover thing. Maybe she should use the money to get one of those realistic dolls.

I plan to BF but was offered a secondhand PP machine for £20 (I’ll spend £7 to change the filter if I do use it). For that money it was worth doing. But I wouldn’t spend £90 on a new one just in case BF doesn’t work out.

If we don’t need / use it then I’ll sell it on secondhand.

OP, could you suggest to your MIL that since you plan to BF, the PP is not likely to be needed but if she really thinks you should have one then secondhand would be ok?

Just let her get on with it and buy one if I were you, then whenever you go round there make the bottles yourself with whatever method you choose it's up to her if she wants to waste her money on something you don't intend to use.

I didn't get a pp machine until ds1 was 4 months old they are nice to have but certainly not a necessity don't let anyone pressure you.

One thing I would say though is, certainly in the early days it won't be easy to judge when baby wants a feed they will act as your alarm clock!

Defo sounds like you have a MIL problem. And maybe a bit of an OH problem if he won't back you. Just keep firm with 'no thank you' then change the subject, no explanation needed. End of the day it's your decision.

Just to back PP tho your idea of setting an alarm may backfire. DS is 11 weeks & a decent sleeper but his one nightly wake up is not spot on every night. I'd struggle to plan ahead for it. Maybe get some ready made for night feeds just in case

I’ve bought one for upstairs and one for downstairs! My best friend had a baby on the 9th August and she can’t rant and rave enough about how good they are when baby is screaming through the night for a bottle,2 minutes and they’re done. If this is keeping you awake at night think you need a reality check 🙈

How do people use them in the bedroom with the flashing & the beeping 😱

I’ve got a normal machine for downstairs and a day/night one for in the nursery no flashing or loud noises. Also gonna have the powder measured ready in the tubs so have to just pour in 👌🏼