Family/friends visiting once baby born

[Pickles31]

Don’t know if anyone else thinks this but my baby is due in a couple of months nov towards Xmas and was hoping me and hubby could spend time together with baby over November and Xmas with just a few close family n friends but I’ve already been getting people/family who don’t keep in touch much saying they are going to come visit when I’ve had the baby. We have a lot going on at the moment as gettting a new kitchen fitted aswell as other work on the house also so house is a bit up in the air. Is it mean of me to say to people that we would prefer not to have visitors until the new year or not? I just feel like I want me and hubby to bond with the baby before people start bombarding us with visits. Does anyone else feel like that? I also don’t want to have to put people up and wait on them whilst dealing with a new baby as I know this will happen as people just invite themselves over.

If it's not close friends', either of your parents/grandparents and either of your siblings then tell them that while you love to see them that due to ongoing building work and having a newborn, you won't be available until the New Year.

I would also make sure you actually have family and close friends' houses you can escape to if you aren't intending to move out while the building work is going on, as any drilling will drive you mad especially if you are trying to take nap at a random time.

Showing off your gorgeous new born is quite usual /normal you know!!

Don't commit to anything, just tell them you will invite them to come see the baby when you are ready.

I think some people say it just to be polite if they're not close friends.
If they do ask at the time then just say in a few weeks would be good as building work/relatives staying/baby has a cold/busy in lead up to Xmas, you have plenty of excuses to use but it would sound better coming at the time rather than when mentioned in passing before.

We had a bit of this... they are just excited and trying to show it, but it can be overwhelming.
At the same time, don't forget that you will be knackered in the first 6 weeks and you may be glad of someone to hold the baby while you shower, nap, etc.
Personally I'd just tell them you'll let them know when you're ready. And if they do turn up, let them make their own cup of tea!

I found it irritating when relatives I hadn’t seen for years wanted to turn up following DC1’s birth. I let them but low and behold, haven’t seen them since...

Newborn babies are just a novelty to some people. If you aren’t close, don’t bother with the visit.

I'd be irritated by people who I rarely see wanting to visit in the early weeks but I think they are just trying to be polite. You can put them off at the time. Personally, before Christmas, I'd only have those friends and relatives who are close enough that will comfortably help themselves to refreshments (and make yours too), who you won't care if they see your untidy home and you can ask to help out a little (e.g. hold baby while you take a shower/nap/tidy up).

It's actually very normal to not want to have a house full of visitors too.. especially if they arnt close ones!

I'm on my fourth baby and we have a no visitor rule for the first week, we then have close family over.. but at a time of our choosing and a maximum of an hour stay... some people just don't know when to leave.

When iv had the go ahead to visit friends who have had baby's.. I always turn up with food for them ( I normally make a fish pie and take some fresh bread n cheese for quick snack foods)

Your baby, your house... do you, be clear and people normally respond well to directions when given.. and if they don't, sod them. You won't get these moment back so please you not others!