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Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

Original poster

Confused

11 replies

icklebutterfly · 17/08/2018 22:25

Hello, I recently posted about some bleeding I was experiencing, I was advised to go to my doctor of which I did, but she wasn’t very helpful and made me feel very judged, I felt like that was because I’ve just turned 18. Let me explain, I went to my doctor’s appointment and explained that I had just found out that I am pregnant and the first thing she replied was ‘I suppose you’re here requesting an abortion’ i said no as that is not what I would like to do. I then told her about my bleeding and she asked if it had stopped and it has, and she said well that’s good then, I was wondering if it had been a miscarriage and she didn’t clear that up, i asked about blood tests and she didn’t seem to think that was necessary? For the past few years I have been on medication for depression and anxiety and I understand that the medication I am on is quite strong so I have already stopped taking it, at the moment I am feeling okay but she then used that as another reason to bring up abortion, saying she would strongly advise it to someone in my situation, I understand that my mental health is important but I also know that many woman who suffer from depression and anxiety have children... she then told me to book in to see the midwife in 2 weeks which I have. I’m confused to why she didn’t think I needed blood tests, especially as I had bleeding? Is it also normal for a doctor to advise an abortion? Im still worried about if I misscarried or not? I have done more pregnancy tests since, some positive some negative but that is the same as before I started bleeding. I don’t want to go to see the midwife and waste their time and block up an appointment for a woman who is 100% pregnant, if I did lose the baby? I really don’t know what to do as now I don’t feel like I can go back to see the doctor, I walked back home crying after my appointment. I really don’t know what to do.

OP posts:
DannyWallace · 17/08/2018 22:32

Oh you poor thing! That doctor sounds just awful!
Is there another doctor at the practice you can see?
Also, your maternity unit may have an early pregnant assessment unit that you can self refer to (when I had an issue I just called them and they told me to come in. Some others you have to be referred through GP, but it's worth a try?)x

GreatestShowWoman · 17/08/2018 22:34

Call your local EPAU as PP said

beccii161016 · 17/08/2018 22:36

Agree with PP your GP sounds awful! Your midwife will be much more helpful and can actually answer your concerns and put your mind at rest about your mental health. I've been on tablets for anxiety which I stopped when I found out I was pregnant and my midwife was very supportive.

Bleeding can be part of a healthy pregnancy but of course it can also mean something is wrong and it is concerning! The general advice is that, the time to worry is if you experience bright red blood, clots or heavy bleeding accompanied by painful cramps.

Your midwife may possibly refer you for an early scan but this depends. You may have urine and blood tested at your check in appointment.

Really hope all is well for you Thanks

SavanahXx · 17/08/2018 22:37

your doctor is 100% a c*nt. your doctors can recommend an abortion, but if its because you'd be high risk in your pregnancy, basically if there's a chance you'd die they would advise one, but they shouldn't advise one any other time, and how far along are you? ring your early pregnancy unit, and they should do 2 sets of bloods a few days apart to see if your hcg has risen, or they could scan you, hope everything is ok Flowers x

Merename · 17/08/2018 22:39

Oh I'm sorry to hear about this experience. No I don't think your doctor should be advising abortion, or bringing it up when you haven't given any indication that's what you want. As you say, many people with depression or anxiety have children and are wonderful parents. I also think she should be giving you clear information about the bleeding or why she isn't taking any course of action. If you want to you could provide written feedback to the surgery and request a different dr next time.

Re the bleeding, there is often little they can do for an early miscarriage, if that's what it was, like I'm not sure what blood tests would tell her. You could have been offered an early scan but depends how early you are. I think you should phone for an appt with a midwife, and ask for it to be asap, explaining about the bleeding.

All the best and - easy to say I know - but try to relax and rest.

cindersrella · 17/08/2018 22:42

I wouldn't be happy with this at all. Can you go back to the docs and ask for a second opinion. You should'nt be treated like this..,, so you have an appt with the midwife and you are unsure if you are pregnant or not.. this terrible.

Can you call the hospital and ask to speak to maternity and see what they advise. This is what I would do.

If you have a local family planning clinic I would also consider going there too for another test.

You really need a blood test if the pregnancy pee tests are not reading properly.

hlr1987 · 17/08/2018 23:00

This sounds like a stressful experience for you. I'm sure the doctor didn't mean to come across quite as she did and may have been confused because most women go straight to midwife appointments and don't see a doctor at all (that may be why she assumed you wanted to terminate). Mine won't do blood tests early as there is little at this point that a blood test would say that a pregnancy test wouldn't. In general in early pregnancy you should only take a pregnancy test first thing in the morning as the less you've had to drink the stronger the hormones will be. If you've drunk a lot in the day it can lead to negative tests in the first two months. A little implantation bleeding is normal.as the egg settles but if it carries on, is heavy bleeding or is accompanied by pain or sickness, you can head to a&e. A pregnancy test won't tell you immediately if you've miscarried though, you have to wait at least a few days. Make a midwife appointment even if you feel silly and explain to the receptionist that you would like to see someone with experience in mental health issues- my sister saw a particular midwife for this.

Original poster
icklebutterfly · 17/08/2018 23:29

Thank you all for your responses, you’re all so lovely. If my EPU needs a GP refferal how should I go about that? I’m also supposed to be 7 weeks today.

OP posts:
Original poster
icklebutterfly · 17/08/2018 23:32

I also wanted to be certain before I told my parents as this isn’t going to go down well. I don’t want to tell them and go through all that stress if I don’t need to. I don’t get along with them very well, I don’t live with either of them and rarely see them which means I can hide it for like longer too

OP posts:
Original poster
icklebutterfly · 17/08/2018 23:48

Sorry for another post, I also just wanted to add, my bleeding lasted for 3 days, I had very miner cramps that lasted for about 30 mins on the first day of it, it didn’t fill a pad and after a couple of wipes after going to the loo (tmi sorry) it was gone until the next time I went to the loo.

OP posts:
SavanahXx · 18/08/2018 00:17

@icklebutterfly you shouldn't need to have a referral from your gp, I know my EPU doesn't do that anyway, you just ring up, explain the problem, and they tell you to come in. Id honestly ring the EPU, they might give you a scan considering your 7 weeks, but if not they should definitely do your bloods, and if your hcg rises, then that's a good sign that the pregnancy is progressing as it should, wishing you all the best, hope all is well SmileFlowers

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