AIBU?? friend overstaying welcome

[Spooples]

Hi ladies, I wanna know if I'm being unreasonable here...

I'm currently 8+3 and in the peak of fatigue and nausea. About 2 weeks ago, a friend of mine from uni (who lives abroad) contacted me to say she was planning to visit the UK and ask if I was "free to meet up" this weekend. Having not seen her in a while and thinking she meant like for dinner or coffee I said sure. 2 days later i get a text from her saying she's booked her flights and will be staying with us from Friday to Sunday!

This is NOT what I had in mind as I'm so exhausted, have a tiny 1 bed flat, and need my weekends to recharge because I'm working 45 hour weeks and am struggling with the fatigue.

I didn't want to kick up a fuss, so low and behold, she's now here. Because I've been struggling though, I let her know in advance that I'm pregnant. She earns about double what I do, and could very easily get a hotel room for the weekend, but has decided that no, she'd rather sleep in my living room.

She's spent all day wanting to walk around "doing London" so I'm exhausted. I've suggested maybe she go out later on her own if she wants to do something as I need to rest, but she won't do anything without me then acts like she's missing out. I'm starting to feel very put out and frustrated. To make it worse, she talks continuously and I'm at my wits end! I just need peace!

If gets worse though. She apparently also did this to another friend whos now said she can't put her up next week, so she's decided she's now staying with me till Monday. I can't face going to work on Monday morning exhausted because she's been here all weekend! Thing is, we never invited her or offered to put her up. She just decided she was staying with us. I'm scared Monday will now turn into Tuesday and so on. Shes spending 3 weeks in the UK and I'm just scared this is going to continue.

AIBU? I can't tell if it's the pregnancy hormones or if it really is totally inappropriate to enforce yourself on a tired, pregnant woman. I can cope with the original plan of tomorrow, but I don't want her staying any longer 😭

Good for you

Spooples - am so glad you told here. hope she's packed and gone as I write this. Rest up my lovely.

Yay! Great news :)

Fab. Well done OP . It can't have been easy , but your friendship will last much longer & maybe a lifetime, if you have your boundaries in place of what suits you as well as friend. XXX

Friends without children don't always get the stuff you go through when pg or later on around DCs needs, so you have to be clear. It's same as if you don't have (or do, even!) kids but have a health condition/ or even unwell/new dogs. Good friends might miss it by not knowing so they don't think about practicalities, but if you spell it out and set boundaries, those good friends listen. X
(Same as you would for them! )