Midwife appointments

[anxiousannie111]

I had a really bad experiences with most midwives in my last pregnancy and this time around I'm reluctant to involve them until I am 12 weeks. I am 8 weeks now and don't plan on informing my GP or midwife until I'm 12 weeks. Am I stupid?

You’re not stupid but it’s a really good idea to involve them. They need to book the scans, etc. Can you request you not have the same midwife?

Sorry, same midwives*

As they’re the only ones I believe who can book scans I’d get in touch just so you can have your 12 wk scan and ensure bubba is ok. You don’t need to tell your GP at all (I didn’t with my second).
Midwives change a lot on rotation so I doubt you’d have the same community midwife as before (depending on how long ago your last pregnancy was) but I’m sure you’d be able to request another if needed.

I never saw the same midwives last time apart from one who I saw twice who was absolutely shocking and I reported her. I'm going to ask if I can go to a different health centre as I have moved now but from start to finish I can't believe these people are in the job they are in! Not one nice experience and I felt they don't really do much before your 12 weeks anyway.

@Teasavedmylife my daughter is only 6 months old and with the experience I had I'm sure they will remember me. I refused to see one woman because she was running late then insisted on standing outside the health centre finishing her cigarette then called me in absolutely stinking of smoke

That's such a shame you've had bad experiences; my midwife and health Visitor were both great (3 years ago) and I'm hoping that I get the same ones again this time round.

It's right tho about rotation- they spend time in Hospital and in the community so maybe not always at the same gp surgeries etc.....

That's awful tho finishing her cigarette and then stinking!!! I'd be making a huge complaint at that!

@Bellabutterfly2016 I sent my health visitor packing aswell she never turned up when she was supposed to and would often just show up one or two days later and bang on the door and wake baby she really irritated me so told her I don't need her help anymore and I will be in touch if I need anything.

Maybe I'm just a cow 🤣

You need to have your bloods/urine check at your booking in appointment, and then the midwife will book your dating scan from there. It’s feally important to ge booked in promptly as there can be a wait for scans, and you only have a set amount of time they can do the tests for downs and trisomies.

So in short yes, stupid to not want to get all the relevant checks in as soon as you can. Even if the midwife is horrible you’ll only see her for an hour max, and you can always complain if you feel the need.

You will need to have your booking in appointment before 12 weeks so you can have your 12 week dating scan booked in.

Why not do that first appointment and see if it's as bad as you think it's going to be? If it is, you can decide what to do. If there are different midwives on rotation now, you'll know its fine for the rest of the time. Its not lile doing one appointment is going to kill you.

Definitely not overreacting! I’d be the same if that happened to me! Not sure what the solution is though! You’re right they don’t do anything other than you’re booking in before 12 weeks... in fact this time I realised the midwife doesn’t do much until 16 weeks when they listen for the first heartbeat.
Maybe phone the local midwife number and ask if you can do the booking in over the phone?

@Teasavedmylife yeah that's what I'm thinking I had quite a few bleeds last time in early pregnancy something to do with my cervix and I was just dismissed all the time. I understand it's common but iv had 4 miscarriages and my only reaction was to panic. I felt they didn't take me seriously until I was 23 weeks. I ended up having my baby on the living room floor on my own. I went to my hospital when I was in labour was told I'm not in labour they didn't feel the need to check me and sent me home bare in mind it was snowing and I lived 20 mins away. I had group b strep aswell so should have been at least checked and given antibiotics through IV. I just think should I ring them when I'm 10 weeks have the initial checks done and go from there

Oh my gosh that’s terrible I’m so sorry you went through that!
I also had bleeding at the start of this pregnancy and was worried about the same due to previous miscarriages, I was lucky enough to have a good midwife who sent me for an early
scan and checks.
It’s terrible that the care system seems so much to depend on the area you’re in!
Do you have an option of going to a different hospital this time?

I'm hoping to have this baby at home.....but planned this time x