Worried about telling my boss

[starlightmagic]

My boss has always said pregnant women are a pain in the backside, he won’t hire people with young children. His method is to push and push until someone can’t take any more and walks. I’m (all being well) 12 weeks Friday, scan on Tuesday. I’m so scared to tell him, I can’t afford to lose my job!
I’ve struggled for years with my temper in a work environment and I’ve done so well to keep this job for nearly 2 years, I don’t want to walk!
Any tips to help me be brave?

If you haven't already, please join a union before you say anything! He can't force you out x

He sounds a complete joy!

Don’t worry OP, there are laws in place to protect you from this sort of discrimination. Good luck and congrats on your pregnancy

When will you have been there 2 years? If it's very soon (a few weeks) hold off telling him, if you can. Once you've worked at a company more than 2 years you have a lot more rights than when you've been employed less than 2 years.

Not til October so not possible :(

When in October? You don't need to tell work until 24 (?) weeks - would that put you into the 2 year zone?

I didn't tell work until 22 weeks for various reasons - and obviously did too good a job of hiding it as they nearly died of shock!

When in October? You don't need to tell work until you're 25 weeks....although from your description of him I wouldn't go down that route. However, you don't really 'need' the extra 2 year rights as employers cannot discriminate anyone for being pregnant. Although many try to find other reasons.

This is what I would do:

• Join a union (if your workplace don't have one you can still join one)
• Start keeping records of all positive praise/comments/emails/appraisals etc
• Use regular review meetings to clarify that he was happy with your work and make notes after the meeting what was discussed
• Tell him as late as possible and consider starting maternity leave slightly earlier if he gives you a hard time (possibly tag on annual leave to the start) - although some would argue that as soon as work know then you have maternity protection. Only you can decide what is best for you.
• Know your rights. At the hint of any problems Maternity Action are very helpful and imo can be better than ACAS

I've worked for a difficult boss in pregnancy. She tried to performance manage me (she was a new boss and wasn't aware that I'd been given an award for outstanding performance a couple of months before she started) and made my life hard. Honestly in the end I went on sick leave and then annual leave before starting maternity leave. Then I never went back because I knew she'd make my life a misery and I wasn't up for a fight.

Just found out I’ve had a MMC so it doesn’t really matter now

So sorry.

Oh goodness, that’s devastating. I’m so sorry . Your boss sounds abominable. I hope you get pregnant again as soon as you feel ready to and cause him the most inconvenience possible.

So sorry Starlight

I find this shocking! Pregnancy and maternity is a protected characteristic under s4 of the equality act. Put simply, he cannot discriminate on the basis of your pregnancy. He must also adopt ACAS for any procedures. Keep a record of everything and also have a chat with Citizens Advice. Excuse my language but he sounds like a complete arsehole! I hope it all works out for you.

@starlightmagic

I'm so sorry I've only just seen your last post. So sorry X

Sorry to hear this

Thanks for messages, feel a bit numb :( don’t think it’s sunk in yet

Oh OP I'm so sorry. What awful news.