How to stop catastrophising?

[camberskank]

I'm 25 weeks pregnant, have had a very complicated pregnancy, lots of bleeding, abnormalities on the 20 week scan which now look to be ok (still lingering in the back of my mind as a 'what if'), suspected pre-eclampsia which seems to have not materialised (yet), hyperemesis which I am medicated for... just lots of things going wrong and all after 3 miscarriage.

I'm finding I'm not enjoying my pregnancy as much because I'm convinced my baby will be sick/won't make it/will have something wrong with him/her etc.

I lay and watch the little kicks every night and just want to cry with happiness as it's the most incredible feeling, but I soon find myself catastrophising and convincing myself that all is not ok...

How do I move past this and enjoy the mech 3ish months of my pregnancy?

*next not mech, doh!

Couldn't read and run. I know exactly how you feel.

I suffered a miscarriage in April and am now seven weeks pregnant again. I'm SO anxious and am going through every dire scenario in my head. I had a reassurance scan today which was absolutely fine (bean measuring right for dates and with a strong heartbeat) but I'm STILL worrying!

It's tough, but I'm considering getting counselling to help deal with my anxiety in a healthier way. Perhaps you should consider doing the same? Good luck and congratulations on your pregnancy!

@CobaltRose big congratulations. I want to tell you not to worry and to enjoy pregnancy but understand how hypocritical that sounds. If only I could take my own advice.

So sorry you went through this. It's heartbreaking, especially when the pregnancy is so welcome. I think you are wise in getting counselling and may consider this myself if possible.

Best of luck to you also. If anything, it does make you appreciate the little things maybe just that tiny bit more than before (even if the fear is overbearing!)

All the best

Hey, I could have written your post which makes my heart break for you. I too have had a complicated pregnancy and then now I am dealing with a tick bite which I feel may have given me lyme disease. At no point of this have I been able to envisage ending up with a healthy baby. The beautiful kicks I feel make me so happy then really sad and I am so jealous of all my pregnant friends who feel ok. I have no advice....other than talk to your doctor about how you are feeling. I think some CBT could really help you change the way your brain reacts to situations. Hang in there, what you are doing is a wonderful thing and it's ok to find it hard. Just take one day at a time xx

Gosh that sounds very tough. I can't help directly but remember your baby now has a chance if he/she is born tomorrow and as every day goes past the chances of a healthy baby gets higher.

Mindfulness.

Honestly it’s so beneficial. The book is inexpensive on Amazon and comes with a CD you listen to twice a day.

here

It's completely understandable, particularly after a loss or complications. The one time when mental health services seem to work in a coordinated way is pregnancy so i would speak to your midwife who can refer you to the right service.

I hope things get better for you

I had a very tricky high risk pregnancy and am prone to catastrophising. I’m not entirely sure how I got through it looking back but I did spend a lot to time talking to my bump almost reassuring myself and reassuring her that it would be ok, she just needed to hang in there etc.
I also reminded myself continually that if born she would be “viable”, there is a lot of medical help for early babies and she would be ok. As the weeks went on this got easier as the chances of all being ok if she was born increased with each week. I also had complete trust in my medical professionals that if at any point she wasn’t safe they would bring her out early.

Thanks everyone. Really struggling to see things in a positive light. It's on of those 'good things happen to other people' type scenarios, as so much has 'gone wrong' so far. I just can't imaging myself having a happy, healthy baby at the end of this...