Husband wants me to have an abortion.

[Becca2018]

Im almost 37 with a 10 year old and 2 step kids 16 and 18years old. My husband works away and after taking 2 plan b pills last month I found out last week that I’m pregnant.
Problem is I can’t decide whether to have an abortion or keep my baby. I’ve been crying every day since and only have 5 days left to decide before the abortion appointment.
My husband is so upset and won’t talk to me says hes too old(46) for more kids, and will leave if I have the baby. Our relationship has been aweful lately I was close to leaving him last month until he convinced me to stay and we were suppose to start marriage counselling next week.
The other issue is that I’m a stay at home mother and wouldnt have the income to comfortably support 2 kids on own without my husband.
I had an abortion already 8 years ago when I first got together with my husband, and it feels so wrong and selfish to have another one. I’ve always wanted one more but my husband never did. I don’t necessarily want a baby at this age but it wouldn’t be the end of the world for me like it is for my husband. I also worry that when I die my 10 year old will be left alone In this world without a blood sibling as his real father isn’t involved is his life.
I feel like I’m in such a big mess right now and either choice is a lose lose situation and have no idea what to do. Any opinions would be greatly appreciated.

If he’s acting like this your marriage is over in all but mane anyway.

You are going to be a single parent eventually as this relationship is doomed.

Your choice is to whether you’ll be a single parent of one or two.

I had my first baby at 37 ... went on to have 2 more.

If you want the baby, have your baby.

Tell him he can have 50% custody as it will allow you to work and be more independent and better off financially.
He’ll be horrified at having to go part time himself!
As you say it will be nice for your 10 yr old to have a sibling and if you want the baby the 3 of you should manage just fine without your h.

Hi all. So 5 weeks ago I found out I was pregnant. I’m 39 and have a 16 year old. My boyfriend has children of 17 and 9. Since finding out he’s threatened to leave if I kept the baby and been very abusive. But on the other hand refused to speak face to face. Even involving his ex wife. He lied to people that I’ve cheated and demanded DNA. he lied about money because he’s a drug user and has left me penniless. Long story short I was booked for a termination and didn’t attend. I’m now almost 11 weeks and have decided to proceed alone. I think he cheated with my best friend. I sit alone day in day out debating if he has despite them both denying it. I kicked him out when he became abusive two weeks ago and he’s moved round the corner. I feel so alone and I am scared that the stress could make bad things happen. He’s been in my life 13 years we we’re work colleagues and had a relationship ten years ago but it didn’t work out and I had a termination then. Now this is my main reason for not wanting one. He can’t see why I would want this baby and he is truely awful to me. Even taking the tv subscription from my house. He’s ruthless. I can’t belive he would turn on me so dramatically and I’m struggling to cope emotionally. I am scared having a new baby 2 weeks before I turn 40! Has anyone else has this and the person changed back or coped easily. Money is always a struggle even though I earn quite well. I would just like someone to tell me I’m not crazy. My mum can’t offer the support she did with my daughter as she is mid 60’s and I’m scared. I wish I could run away and hide. Just get away for a while but I can’t. I feel trapped, used and incredibly let down as well as hurt. I’m better off without his behaviour but I am devastated and would just like someone to tell me I’m doing the right thing. Thanks for reading.

What I don't understand is how people say you'll manage financially when you're a SAHM, how?

my partner wanted me to have an abortion, he was awful about it, made me feel like i was ruining his life if i didn't have one, but i stood my ground and kept the baby because i didn't think i could cope or go through with the alternative, i didn't think i could afford it or do it, but the truth is that if you want the bubba you make it work, i now have my own house, my little girl, i'm skint but its all worth it for her, please don't let this decision be his, this needs to be a decision on your accounts, if you want the baby or feel like you couldn't cope with another abortion don't have one, let him leave x

@Morgan02 It would be better to start your own thread.

The baby is gone :( regretting every minute

OP - I think you need counselling - I think you also need to seriously consider leaving and filing for divorce.

@becca2018 I hope you are as ok as you possibly can be. I am so desperately sorry you had to go through this x

So sorry @becca2018.

It is your decision at the end of the day and unfortunately no matter what you decide it is not going to go the way you want. But it is your decision, if he leaves, he leaves and you will find a way to make it work for you and your two children.

But you also need to ensure it is what you want and that you will not blame the baby in the long run for the end of your marriage. As for how would you cope, how were you going to cope when you were thinking of leaving him a month ago?!

Whatever choice you make it needs to be the right one for you as you will need to be emotionally and mentally strong to cope with a pregnancy on your own. Many women have done it so it is not something that can not be accomplished.

So sorry op . Did you terminate or miscarry ?