Woops... I’m pregnant again

[Dandelionrarrrr]

Just found out I’m expecting DC3. I am pretty shocked. I have had fertility problems and haven’t been able to conceive without the help of clomid. I must admit It’s kind of my fault as regardless of my fertility issues I should’ve had the coil fitted when DS2 was a year. I just couldn’t find the time, ridiculous now I look back. He is still Bf, too much really for a 15mo and I still haven’t had my period.
I can’t believe I am pregnant again, I feel completely shocked. I didn’t want number3 but feel awful for saying it. I’ve openly said this to anyone who has asked before I found out.
I don’t know how far along I am either so feel guilty for that too. I’ve drunk alcohol.
I had a few cramps and someone at work said oh your not pregnant again are you, then I kept seeing ‘signs’ so I did an old test I had lying around and boom clear red line. Clear blue says 3+. I’m scared!!

I need fertility drugs for our first DC but the second happened when we weren't even trying. My OB/gyn explained that a successful pregnancy often clears up fertility issues. I'm surprised you weren't warned of this so that you could be more careful with your birth control.

If you didn't drink to huge excess don't worry about it. Just focus on having a healthy pregnancy now.

What exactly are you scare of now?

Not the pregnancy itself. It’s having 3 and not really having the space. Will I even be able to fit 3 car seats in my car? I feel like DS2 hasn’t really had a chance at having attention on him and it will be so much harder lugging around a baby. It’s just going to be so many more changes again that I wasn’t ready for. I’m just venting really as I feel awful saying these things in real life because I am happy it’s just a big shock.

I completely understand. I also found myself unexpectedly pregnant (contraception failure) with my third (one of whom is only just 2).

It's been a huge shock for us and I'm still getting used to it. Also not much space and was worried about the car. Also worried about money too.

What helped me was trying not to think about all these things in one go, eg how are we going to afford to send them all on big school trips when they're older. Then I realised that this won't happen until they're older and who knows what circumstances will be like then, but that we have every opportunity to get into a more affordable position. Childcare costs isn't an issue for us either and so that's a weight off now. I guess looking at it one thing at a time helps and trying not to let it overwhelm. We took our car to a car seat centre to work out whether we could fit 3 across and they advised which 3rd seat to get to make it feasible. Two children will need to share a room and we're going to need to get bunk beds and get savvy on storage and yes we might feel claustrophobic, but hopefully in 5 years or so we can move.

I guess what I'm saying is that whilst it's a lot to get your head around, try not to think about all the difficulties at once. If we all did this then we'd never do anything.

As for the small age gap, I'm trying to think what good friends they'll be.

Thanks for such an encouraging response. It’s true we don’t know what’s going to happen in the future. Glad it is working out for you. My 15 mo is so needy at the moment, but like you say it is at the moment, things change. I never really focused on the age gap making them friends, just thought of the problems! I think everyone is going to be expecting a DD after to boys. I hope this isn’t going to bring more anxiety, as I’m sure it will be another DS

*two