Am I the only one who doesn't want to spill the beans?

[dellie84]

I am currently 14w + 2 d with much wanted dc2 and not inclined to tell anyone. My DH obviously knows, and the medical prpfessionals.

I just have an urget to keep it to myself as long as possible.

I had a mmc at 12 weeks in November, but had two scans this time and all looks good.

I want to delay telling dc1 for as long as possible as 40 weeks is a long time - plus can't be sure dc won't tell the world.

I find it a bit odd I feel like - I also work for a small company so it will be a bit of a big deal when it comes out work wise. (Plus I just asked for a payrise, and I don't feel bad as I deserve it whilst working!)

Has anyone else felt like this? How long could you keep it to yourself and did people e.g. PIL or friends get annoyed?

Hi op

I felt exactly like this, most especially with my first which followed a loss. I don't think it's at all unreasonable or unusual. I told absolutely no-one until after the results of the tests at the 12 week scan were back. Kept it from work until after the 20 week scan showed all ok. Did not enjoy sharing the news and felt awkward about the questions. Was not quite so severe second time around, due to timing around Christmas, private scan that had shown all fine at around 11 weeks and, I suppose, having had a successful pregnancy.

I don't think anyone was 'annoyed' as such. People generally understand keeping things quiet at the beginning. However, I also feel the same way about the end, and told no-one I was in labour. First they heard of it was that a healthy baby had arrived in the night, which was a surprise to those who had expected some updates. Am currently 40+1, trying to decide if contractions have started and will be doing the same this time around as far as is possible with arrangements to be made for my DD1.

At the end of the day, it's your body, your pregnancy and 100% your choice. Don't let anyone make you feel otherwise.

My parents knew from very early on as did a couple of good friends; people who had supported me through a MMC at 11 weeks.

I didn't announce my pregnancy to anyone else until after the 20 week scan and I was 25 weeks when I told my colleagues!

This is your decision. Do what feels right for you!

I didn't tell my parents until 16 weeks but that's because I wanted to see them in person and hadn't seen them! I told my closest friends as and when I saw them after my 12 week scan but tried to keep it quiet at work outside my department until the 20 week scan.

Thanks all - interetsing to hear your stories!
I'm not gushy so think its quite nice to keep it to yourself.
I agree about telling people in person too and I'm not sure when I see my parents face to face next.
A close friend did ask and I lied... I felt I should say when I am ready - she did know about mmc and I was moaning about enormous boobs!
We didn't tell my lovely PIL about the mmc, as we have always said we only wanted one so didn't want them asking questions etc and being expectant plus MIL has said one is plenty, odd as she does have two herself! So they might find it odd I kept it to ourselves - I'll just say because of DC (who doesn't want a sibling - although did ask for one the day of mmc- irony!)