Elective c-section, seeing the consultant, what to expect...

[Paraketamol]

Due to a variety of reasons - my anxiety, fear of loss of control, a recent traumatic event and other reasons I want to request a c-section. This is my first child. I’m about 10
weeks.

My midwife has been supportive, she believes it’s my choice.

I think I struggled to explain myself to her, but she has referred me to the consultant - I got my letter this morning.

Can anyone tell me what to expect from the consultant - I suppose I am anticipating having a massive battle on my hands.

I am currently not sleeping with worry about it and yesterday admitted to my DH that without a c-section I don’t know if I can do this.

I’d appreciate anyone’s experiences. Thanks.

Hi, I requested an elective for my second baby (born 10 weeks ago) and had no problems at all when I met with the consultant. He told me that long gone are the days when they could try and deter you and make you jump through hoops. Said if that’s what I wanted then that was fine. Met him at 20 weeks but it got confirmed at 35 weeks and my c sec was booked then for 39+4 days. I was exactly like you. Worried for weeks and lost sleep. Thought I’d be basically on trial to prove why I was worthy of one but it really wasn’t like that. Try not to worry. I’m pretty sure the NICE guidelines state that everyone has the right to a c sec if they choose. They give you all the facts about the risks and warn you about recovery but they certainly don’t refuse you or they didn’t in my case.

I had my appointment with the consultant yesterday (30wks) & they simply explain the pros & cons of a caesarean & natural birth & give u further info to make ur final decision and advise this should be made between 34-36 wks
It is ur choice there is no fighting to get it

I had no trouble, they just gave me a leaflet with pros and cons and that was that. Didn't need to fight or justify anything. This was with my first and second babies, and within last 4 years in West Yorkshire.

I'm sure NICE guidlines state it is up to you what you want and although they have to try speak to you about it and help you make the best decision they actually cannot refuse to give you a section. I had no problems getting the consultant to agree to a section this time. I have previously had a c section though for first baby who was breech so that may have swayed it a bit. The consultant just said it is my choice and they will do what i wish.

Thanks all; I’m a wee bit more reassured; still feeling like I need to be armed with my justification though as it’s my first!
My mental health is suffering whilst I stress over the whole pregnancy/Labour/parenting ability if I’m honest and combined with the exhaustion and sickness, it’s sucking the joy from life a bit!

I'm in the same position as you Paraketamol, and have my 16 week appointment tomorrow with a consultant to discuss the possibility of an elective.

I found my GP awful when I mentioned an elective in my very first appointment, she responded that "Anxiety isn't a good enough reason". Thanks GP, that's really helpful, you clearly have no understanding of severe anxiety. That comment is exactly what I was afraid of and features in my nightmares of being forced into a vaginal birth.

Fortunately my midwife was a lot more understanding of me stuttering through my wish for an elective (afraid of the same reaction) and referred me to a consultant with no issue. Fingers crossed my appointment tomorrow will be with someone more like my midwife, and less like my GP.

Will be thinking of you tomorrow Knuckles - I’d be interested in hearing how it goes if you feel like sharing; the first midwife I saw was horrid. Pretty much said I was being selfish and my child would have the worst start - I was taken aback as both myself and DH plus are siblings are all c-section babies, due to our DMs having complications - we’re all formula fed too and no issues!

Fortunately my GP and my apparently actual midwife are both pro-choice; which has been reassuring - my appointment is in 3 weeks, so I feel my midwife is at least taking me seriously.

Just got back from my appointment Paraketamol, I'm afraid to say it went exactly as I expected it would! The consultant gave me lip service about understanding my anxiety and fears, then proceeded to tell me all about the risks of c-sections when I asked for the positives and negatives of both delivery options. From the sounds of it, you'd think women sailed through vaginal deliveries.

His response to my mentioning feeling out of control was "You're in control of everything, and you'll have pain relief like gas and air which you control", which isn't really the type of out of control that I mean. Also, "If you're at risk of tearing then we will cut a section instead so that you don't tear", which is clearly so much better? I didn't feel like it was a very objective conversation at all and left feeling a bit deflated.

Ultimately, he reluctantly told me it is my decision (not in so many words though) and I have until 36 weeks to decide. I will continue to do my own research and let them know my decision at my next consultant appointment at 30 weeks as I don't trust them to give me an objective response.

Good luck for your appointment in 3 weeks though, it seems to be luck of the draw who you speak to so I hope your appointment is with someone understanding. I'll be taking away from this appointment that although I feel deflated, they still agree it is ultimately my decision.

I’m now 32 weeks and am also having an elective caesarean (I have had previous pelvic bone surgery, hypermobility issues etc).

My midwife referred me to consultant and we went through the pros and cons of vaginal vs c-section etc. She was impressed at level of research I’d done and was happy to recommend me to have elective as she felt I had a good understanding and had made a sound decision based on evidence and my own personal circumstances. Supports me fully.

New guidelines mean pregnant women can request one for a reason that isn’t necessarily ‘medical’ (their words!) as well such as fear of birth according to NHS website.

If you’re at all fretting then I’d say do some research, show you’ve looked into it and will make you feel more confident in explaining why you want one if nothing else. You don’t need to but it may help calm your nerves about the appointment.

Oh Knuckles, I’m really sorry to hear that - the positive is that it is your decision - don’t be rail roaded- not that I think you would; we know are own minds and bodies better than the consultants.

Lynz - I’m glad to hear you’re having he elective you wanted; can you point me in the direction of any information you’ve found useful? I keep being told that the nhs site is the one that’s best but don’t fins it all that informative!

Hi OP just to say that I believe it’s your choice and it’s a matter of being assertive and firm about it, and making it clear that you fully understand the pros and cons of each. I was induced with my DS, and ended up having an assisted delivery in theatre after a 4 day labour. I am not pg at the moment but if I got pg tomorrow I would be asking for an elective cs. For me it’s also about control. I was so high on all the drugs by the time they were telling me I was going to have an episiotomy I was at the stage where I truly didn’t care, I remember a weird feeling of detachment. It made it hard to accept that my DS was here in those early days. Do what you need to do and congrats on your pregnancy.

I am a science geek so a lot of the studies I looked at are unreachable (I have a scientific journal subscription!), hardest was finding recent info as a lot are old. I have put two links below you might find helpful?

Speaking to friends who have recently given birth is also an important part of your own research into personal experiences. I’ve had friends who have had 4th degree tears, piles which show no sign of leaving months after, emergency sections after 48hr labour, horrendous infections after c-section surgery etc. but I’ve also got friends who said they managed with gas and air for vaginal, found it really intimate and special (although mentioned the ring of fire!), and others felt being able to know what was happening and when for planned sections then had quick problem free recoveries from c-sections etc. so some found both options really well supported. I think your support network and medical team make a huge difference to your experience.

Being realistic and your consultant seeing you understand that neither option is without risk goes a long way to them seeing you are making informed choices.

www.google.co.uk/amp/s/amp.livescience.com/45681-vaginal-birth-vs-c-section.html

bmcpregnancychildbirth.biomedcentral.com/articles/10.1186/s12884-015-0655-4

It might depend on your health board - I'm in Scotland and had no problems asking for a c section whatsoever. The consultant just made sure I knew the risks involved and that I didn't think of it as the 'easier option'. Best of luck OP!

Thanks for those links Lynz, they were interesting to read.

I was chatting to a doctor friend recently who is also expecting. Yes, the choice is yours. But some teams try to steer away from C-section because they cost more money (standard vaginal delivery - £500, standard elective c-section £1,500). She said to do your research and be firm with what you want.

I had a very easy reasoned discussion with the consultant at 16 weeks, C-section agreed. Then at 36 weeks I saw a vile consultant who couldn't understand why "an intelligent woman would want a c-section over a vaginal delivery". I told him I had discussed it with the first consultant and I had not changed my mind nor was I going to discuss it again with him. He reluctantly booked me in, I thought it had been too easy at 16 weeks, perhaps we are all destined to a difficult consultant at some point! Hope your latter appointment goes much better and do just stick to your guns!

Hi everyone first time posting here so hang on in there 😁👍🏼

I’m currently 25 weeks pregnant with my 3rd I’m having a little girl. I have a 3 year old son and a 2 year old daughter soooo yes my hands are going to be extremely full! I have suffered with severe anxiety and depression for years and I am only 25. They have recently upped my medication too 150 mg of sertraline a day too help with my crippling anxiety. I would like too be sterilised after having this child. In an ideal world I’d like to have an elective c section and be sterilised at the same time.... I just have no idea who I need too contact first and wether they would actually do this for me? Any guidance tips or advice would be greatly appreciated! Many thanks!!