Am I wrong to want to choose the middle name?!?

[bowgumdrop2018]

So me and the baby's father haven't seen eye to eye on many things including the baby's first name but we agreed on a name eventually and it wasent my first choice at all and it was a name I wanted to use since I was a little girl ...he didn't have any name in mind so that's why it was frustrating but I respected him and went with what he liked and the name has had to grow on me ... but I've found a middle name I really want and like and he I saying we need to talk about it ect... I know a lot of you will say he's right and it should be an agreement but surely if I couldn't have the first name i wanted I can have the middle name... I personally feel going through the pregnancy and the labour ect I deserve to have that🤷🏻‍♀️ Again I know many of you will attack me for this but that's okay I just want to know if anyone still went with what they wanted regardless

Are you in a relationship with him, itreads like you’re not... in which case, I’d consider his opinion... but only a bit.

If you’re with him, then it’s a bit more of a give and take situation, but I still consider the main decision to be the mothers.

I’m assuming the baby will have his surname? That’s good enough surely?

First name picked together.

I picked one middle name. Hubbie picked a second.

If you aren't in a relationship I would just pick both the names and give the baby my surname. I think I am getting old and tetchy but if you're not in a relationship you need clear boundaries and not to be pushed around in the name of compromise.

With my first two kids, I really wish I’d given them my surname. I was going to... buy everyone around me said I was being really out of order, I was engaged to be married so we’d all have the same name soon, etc. So I gave in and they had his name.

We were together nine years, never married and I got so sick of schools and other places phoning and asking for ‘Mrs P’ rather than ‘Miss C***’ that my kids ate now ‘known as’ my surname.

Still irks that legally we don’t share a name, but at least on a day to day basis we do.

My partner picked the first name for our boy and I picked the middle name. If we have a girl I'd pick the first name. That's just how we made it easier :) hope you both sort it

If you aren't married then you don't have to agreed to his suggestion as it is you who registers the birth. You can't easily change forenames, but I suggest you think long and hard about giving the baby his lastname or only his lastname as he can block you from changing the baby's lastname by getting parental responsibility which is very easy to get.

If you are married then clearly you have to agree.

Btw we have both agreed on firstname after looking a lists of names and meanings. I rejected lots of names to ensure they weren't the same as family members of the same generation or friends' children. I choose the middle names afterwards avoiding what my OH didn't like. The lastnames will be both our lastnames as mine is rare and his is very common.

Me and DP are together but not married and DS has his surname. I 100% wish I’d insisted on giving DS my surname, so please consider it!

You should get the final say (provided he doesn’t hate the name of course)

My OH was being pretty pushy with names but I’ve put my foot down. The baby will get his surname and we’ve agreed on a first name so I wasn’t willing to compromise on middle names.

Besides I’m doing all the hard work here!

So no don’t compromise if you don’t want to